I realize this is long but I'm at a desktop computer not on my phone which makes it easy to type lol so here I go!
I am trying very hard to find a way to encourage you because I hate seeing someone who so desperately wants to be a nurse but can't get there. I did a bit of Googling and found that some states do have unlimited numbers of attempts at NCLEX and so you must be in one of them. But I also found that the longer someone is out of school, and the more attempts that are made, the less likely it is that they will pass the exam. That isn't opinion that is just what the statistics are. I know it isn't what you want and I'm sorry to be saying it but if you don't know that now you should.
Believing you should keep on trying until you succeed is admirable in most things, it's a great trait. In some things though it just becomes a futile (dare I say foolish) endeavor. I tried Googling to see how many times is the most times anyone has ever failed the exam, and also if anyone has passed after this many fails. Throughout my search it was your User ID that kept popping up with links to this site over the years. It looks as if you might hold the record for number of failed attempts or if not no one is sharing that on the internet.
I'm so sorry sianee but the flaw in the thinking that you should never give up is that there is a chance you could pass. It's frighteningly optimistic to say the least. Are you ok with spending another year testing? Or another two or five, and more thousands of dollars? Have you set for yourself a true end game, a point at which you would consider stopping? What do your friends and family say about all of this?