Hi, I'm currently a 3rd year nursing student doing a BScN, so a 4 year degree at a university in Canada. I have one more year left to go until I graduate.
I've wanted to be a nurse ever since 9th grade. I saw nurses working at the hospitals and I felt like thats what I really wanted to do. I had my career already figured out since 9th grade... I've stuck along with it and had an interest in it in 10th, 11th and 12th grade. I'm not gonna lie I did not do enough research into what nurses do exactly, thats when I first started nursing school and realized there were so many things I didn't like about nursing. We did foundation courses (anatomy, physiology, microbiology, and etc) in our first year of first semester and I found them to be okay. But in second semester we started taking "nursing" classes, like health assessments, nursing theory, and labs like hand washing, vital signs, bed baths and feeding. This was the moment I realized I started to not like nursing... the stuff was extremely boring. I was thinking of changing degrees during this time but clinicals started second year.. so I gave it the benefit of doubt but even then I didn't like it. In our first clinical we were in a long-term care setting and we did lots of personal care like changing clothes, bathing, feeding and I didn't like it. I went along with it until 3rd year, because thats when we start doing acute care (called med-surg in US), and thats the stuff I was into. I finished my 3rd year this year and I don't like what I'm learning... I find the material really boring and I have no interest in studying at all because some of the stuff is common sense. In clinicals, at the end of shift we always do post-conference and I never contribute or reflect on my day because I have nothing to say. Everyone in nursing seems to really like what they're doing and the people in my clinical group have so much to say and so much insight to share from their experience, but I have literally nothing to share. I feel like I don't have a "nurse" personality too. Like I don't fit the role with my personality. A nurse is very outgoing and has a lot of empathy and compassion for patients. And I'm shy, and I feel like I do care about patients and have empathy but like its not enough to showing that I really truly care if you know what I mean.
Should I change my degree or stick with nursing? Throughout high school I found that I really liked math, calculus, physics and chem. And theres none of that in nursing and I feel like thats why I'm so bored and have no motivation. I liked bio too, but in nursing the biology material we learn is very general, it doesn't go into depth. I find my memorization skills on the weak side.. I'm better at solving math equations. The math in nursing is extremely easy. We have to pass a medication administration exam before entering clinicals at the beginning of every semester and I haven't studied for any of them every since my very first clinical and I'm able to get 100% on it every time and do it within 8 minutes.
I'm thinking of changing my degree and doing engineering because I really enjoy math. But here is the problem, I'm already 3 years deep into this degree and have one more year left to go and my student loans only lets u borrow 60k for one bachelor's degree. I took out 15k first year, 12k second year and 10k my third year. If I were to start a new degree to scratch I wouldn't be able to afford it. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted to love nursing and I tried so hard to like it but I just don't. After 3 years I finally realized it doesn't fit my personality and the skills that are needed in nursing school don't match any of my strengths. I think Ishould of switched out in my first year so I wouldn't be having this life crisis right now