JVRB4

VM85 you did not offend me and I hope I didn't sound as though you did. No my friend is not very active in the church. She does attend on most of the Sundays she is not working and she is in the choir and attends the womens mission group meetings (forgot to include that I am also a member and hold an office in that). She is not very active in the group other than to attend a mtng once a month and donate something to the mission projects. For her church is last on the list its something she does when it fits into her schedule. I had hoped to get a PRN (per diem) position but I was told they only hire experienced nurses for that also. At this point I am just going to answer the questions as honestly as I can and pray that if I am meant to have this job then that door will open for me. There is no need in pushing for something that isn't right for me in the first place. If I don't get a part time position then I may check into a flu clinic.

I should have been more clear to start. A friend from church is an LPN on this unit and I asked if they had any part time positions. I explained to her that I was only interested in part time. She said she would check. Later she came to me and said they had a nurse turn in her resignation and that she was full time but to apply anyway. I filled out an application stating part time only and included my resume. This was not for any specific job posting as the new opening has not been posted yet. I received a call from my friend saying that the director had tried to contact me and wanted to schedule an interview. When I called her she asked what I was looking for and I told her part time. I never presented myself as being interested in anything more in hopes of changing her mind later. I know this may sound dumb to many and it certainly isn't a popular feeling in todays society or the current job market but for me my priorities are in order God first, family second and then job. Don't get me wrong when I am working I am 100% there and I will work over and come in on unscheduled shifts to help out if I can. I simply don't see the point in presenting myself as if the job is going to be #1 in my life and then my family and church wherever I can fit it in when I know my beliefs won't alow me to do that. I will become stressed and no one will get the effort they deserve from me. Yes I know this may be the very thing that will keep me from getting hired. How does it help to get hired to a job that a few months from now I will hate. That was part of the problem with the last job. I felt completely overwhelmed by the work load along with my other responsibilities. I don't want to find myself in the same place all over again.

Sorry in advance for being so long but Im freaking out. After my earlier thread "Lost, Afraid...." I finally had the courage to apply for a position at the local hospital. I have an interview scheduled for 10:00 in the morning. I have a couple of questions I am hoping you all will be able to help me with. 1) I want to work part time (16-20hrs/wk) not that I mind working more on occassion but I don't want to be required to work more every wk. I have an elderly grandmother that I am responsible to carry to all Dr. appts, purchase groc for, pick up meds, and anything else she needs. I also have a daughter with localized linear scleroderma which requires her to see a rheumatologist, eye specialist, specialized orthodontist, and from time to time a cranial/facial surgical specialist. I also am very active in my church such as member of church counsel, choir member, youth director, CIA director and fellowship committee. I also have a 14yo son. With all of these responsibilities I know I can't handle working full time. I want to work to keep my skills from school and I need the additional income but I don't need the income from a full time position. When I spoke to the Med/Surg Director to schedule the interview she seemed to push full time saying "Don't you know in advance when the appts are, we do self scheduling so you can work around them". How do I word it to make her understand that I can't work full time and give 100% to the job I do, but I do want a job? 2) What would be the best way to explain why I haven't worked since I left my 1st job after only 2.5 months and that was 9 months ago. Part of it was fear and not wanting the stress if I didn't have to and part is the poor job market. 3) What would be a good answer to the "Where do you see yourself in 5 yrs" question. I don't see myself going back to school. My family is my priority and taking care of them. If I didn't need the money I would stay at home now. If I do anything at all different from the original part time position short of not working at all it would be to work on some sort of committee to plan community events. I really enjoy planning events (I planned and organized a harvest festival and a Christmas pageant for my church and my brothers upcoming wedding). I love things that are creative far more than scientific but I don't know of a way to use my education in nursing while doing what I love. 4) I also have alot scheduled right now that I can't get out of. My brothers rehersal dinner & wedding Oct 2-3rd (I am also responsible for making the wedding cake, the brides bouquet, and decorating the church and reception). Two youth events Oct 17th and 24th (non refundable tickets and I'm the director). Nov 13th Gaithers concert, Nov 16th daughters Dr appt (specialist). How do I start off having to have so much time off and not look like a flake? Should I be upfront and tell her about all of this in the interview, when offered a position (if Im offered), or what? This is a prime example of why I can only work part time. Any help anyone can give would be great. Thank you in advance!

Thank you so much to everyone. You have all been a major source of encouragement. I just printed an application for the hospital near me and I spoke with a friend who works there this wk end and apparently someone just turned in their resignation. She was full time but I am hoping they will consider splitting the time between me and someone else as I need to only work part time to allow me time for the care of my grandmother, kids, church resp. etc. I am so glad that I posted this thread. I have felt like such a failure, idiot and fraud for months now. Everyone else in my class has moved ahead in their careers with no apparent difficulty and here I sit stagnant. Your wonderful, encouraging and honest responses have given me a new sense of strength and courage to move forward. I certainly hope my future co-workers will be as wonderful as all of you have been (assuming I get hired). Thank you again!!!!

"The other new nurses (who only have about 2 weeks of experience on me), seem so confident and do the job with ease, while I feel like I'm struggling just to get all my meds passed in a timely manner! Then, they hired another new nurse two weeks after me, and I think she's already up to the same patient load as me! (again, making me feel like a total idiot). At the end of the day, the preceptors I work with say "Great job today", but I wonder how much of that is just a line that they say to everyone. I just don't know. Some days I think I'm doing ok, other days I can't even get my assessment charted until after my shift is over. " This is exactly how I felt before I quit. There was one other RN who was hired about 2wks before me but she had not taken boards yet. She was very confident and calm. She worked night shift and I worked days but we saw each other at shift change and sometimes she would work days. She did charge about a wk after passing boards (about 1 month after she started) and she was fine with it. Her extreme confidence made me feel even more like an idiot. I know everyone learns at a different pace but it is NO fun being the last one.

Where I was working there was only 1 RN on each shift. While I was in orientation my preceptor told me that because she was the only RN (I didn't count due to orientation) she could go to caf and get lunch but had to return to the floor to eat. This meant that I also returned to the floor to eat. We had to clock out however we had to be on the floor and if their was a ph call for RN we had to take it, if there was a pt needing a narc IV push or PCA we had to go give it etc. After I came off orientation I generally worked thru lunch but I did not clock out and I would write on the form we had that I did not get lunch. Most of the time I would get paid for that time but sometimes I didn't depending on if "they" felt it was reasonably necessary for me to need to work thru to get things done.

Over the past few wks I have spent a lot of time on this site reading all kinds of posts from new grads that are afraid, feel like they didn't learn anything in school or have forgotten every thing already etc. As I have read these I have also spent time thinking about my first job and how I gave up on myself after only a few wks and really taking a hard look at myself. I am still scared to death of trying again and failing. I know there is alot I have forgotten since its been 8 months since I have doon anything in the field but I think I am going to give it a try. I may not even get an interview but its worth a try I think. I pulled out a book a purchased in school called "How to Get Straight A's in Med/Surg" and some other reference materials I have and started reviewing the info. I thought if I atleast read over the material it will help to refresh my mind on the basic patho, diseases and the nursing care for them and I thought I would begin reviewing my pharmacology book from nursing school. Right now my plan is to spend the next couple of wks reviewing and trying to get back in "nurse" mode and making sure my resume is straight. I think I will apply for a position on the med/surg/peds/telem unit at the hosp that is 10 min from home. I am hoping I can get a part time position working 16-24hrs/wk. I think part time will be better because I have to spend so much time in other responsibilities such as my kids, church, taking my grandmother to appts and running all of her errands not to mention my husband travels a fair amt for his job. I am hoping working fewer hrs and not spending so much time commuting will help to take some of the pressure off. As I have reviewed the events of the first job I realized a portion of the problem was getting up @ 5am to be at work by 6:30 and even when I worked 8hr shift I had to wait for my husband to get off @5pm and sometimes as late as 7pm to pick me up and then the 1hr drive home and this was 4x/wk. Having said all of that I have a few questions... 1) Would it be better to try for a night shift position? I have heard things usually slow down around 11pm leaving the rest of the shift calmer to review p&p manual and talk with other nurses about how they do things etc and to get charting done without the phone ringing 50million times etc. 2) If asked in interview about my previous job, reason for leaving, and why I have been out of work since then how should I respond? Especially since I technically did not give any notice. I simply spoke to the NM at the end of my shift and explained how I felt. She said she thought it was coming and understood but hated to see me go. I offered to come back on Sat which was my last scheduled day for that pay period but she said there was no need that she had overstaffed for that day anyway and she would have had to call someone off anyway. I know it was stupid but I did not give a written notice nor did I come back after that day. I had worked approx. 70 days total. Should I explain during interview or say as little as possible and hope they don't call for a ref from that hospital or that they won't say I just left? Thank you all for listening and for the advice.:confused: 3) What would be some good questions to ask them in interview? 4) Does anyone have any other suggestion for me to prepare after being out of work for so long?

Sounds great! I live in a rural community and though the local hospital is a little lager than what you describe the perks are not as good. I wish you the best of luck in your new career!

You described almost exactly how I felt/feel. I graduated in May '08 went to work in Sept '08 and felt like an idiot. Take everything you described and add to that not remembering alot of medications (what they were for, side effects etc) and not knowing some basic administration techniques such as how to draw up phenergan (how to dilute in syringe etc) and when do you add med to a mini saline bag and piggy back it vs drawing it up in a syringe and pushing it and what do you do when your pt has 3 IV piggy's ordered for the same time. I was so embarrassed by my lack of knowledge and self-confidence. I felt like everyone else was smarter than me. This along with the environment I was in was more than I could take and I quit. Looking back I shouldn't have quit, now that I am reading post on this site I can see that alot of this is very normal and everyone seems to experience it. I quit in Dec '08 just after my orientation ended and I have been afraid to try again. I am trying to get the courage up to apply for a med/surg position in another hospital but now its been so long I am even less sure of my knowledge. Just my opinion but from someone who gave up on herself very early in her career I would suggest trying to hang in there. If the environment is good and the staff is helpful then stay and give yourself a chance. If the current job doesn't seem to fit or the staff is not receptive to you as a new grad and willing to help you and be supportive then try to find another job before you quit this one. Just keep at it and I think you will get it with time. Good luck!

Thank you Celia214 for your prayers. I hope you enjoy Psych and hopefully you will find exactly what you are looking for. Lucky for me my husband makes enough to keep us afloat so I don't have to work right now. I say that's lucky, it is in a way because it helps to relieve some of the stress but at the same time it also alows me a way out of facing my fears and weaknesses. I am continuing to search my soul for what I truly feel I am supposed to be doing. Good luck in your future as a nurse!

I am generally very shy and quiet. Don't trust my own judgement in most nursing situations either so I know what it is like to feel intimidated. I am trying to work on my self confidence and my ability to stand up for myself. Amazing how difficult that can be for some of us. It has been my experience that their are some seasoned nurses who do seem to "eat their young". Maybe it's there way of getting rid of the weak ones and making the rest stronger so they can handle themselves against the not so nice Dr's, pts, and familiy members. Seems like maybe they could come up with a better way. I think some who have the ability to become GREAT nurses once they become comfortable in that skin are scared out of the field before they have the chance to become more confident. What a shame and waste of talent and compassion. "I had one girl who thought "nice" equaled "weak" -- and she tried to intimidate me. I got right in her face and told her if she wanted an intellectual fight about the subject, she was missing a weapon". TOO FUNNY, I love this one I hope I remember this one.

In nursing just like every other field there are people who are good and people who are not good at what they do. In nursing some are great with the technical aspects and the knowledge but not so great with bed side manner. Some show compassion in different ways. It should never be ok to tell a pt you don't care regardless of the situation. When I was working I tried to remember 2 things when dealing with pts 1) How would I treat or speak to this person if they were my family and 2) How would I treat or speak to this person if they had a family member in the room with them, then do so accordingly. Maybe this pt was tx poorly, maybe she wasn't no one really knows but the person she is speaking of and herself (assuming she is of sound mind). We are all responsible for our own actions and yes some pts will manipulate but even so that doesn't mean we just ignore a pts report of poor tx. Kids sometimes lie too but that doesn't mean if a child reports being abused it should just assume it is another lie. We investigate or tell the approp person so they can. Never assume anything because there are nurses who do tx pts poorly and there are pts who will lie/manipulate for attention or whatever. Compassion is an important part of nursing. No its not a requirement to provide competent care which of course is a must but it can make the difference between just meeting the mark of competent and surpassing that mark and really making a difference for that pt. As a family member of a dying lung ca pt, a nursing student and a newbie I have seen all kinds of nurses. Some who just met the mark of competancy and some who appeared as though I was an inconvenience in their day. Then there have been those who as a family member they have brought me coffee, cried with me because it touched them deeply to see the pts pain and have taken time to support me as I watched a loved one die. As a student and newbie there have been those that answered all questions (no matter how dumb) and took the time to explain actions and decisions rather than the somewhat typical "because that's how it's done" or "because Ive done it that way for xx years". As newbies we may not ask the right way but we ask because we don't know. We have been shown another way or told differently and we are trying to figure out who is right and who we should follow. Nursing is an every changing field that is why we do ce's so just because a nurse has done something a certain way for xx years doesn't mean she is right all the time and just because the newbie is inexperienced doesn't mean she is wrong. In the end we all need to be more compassionate and respectful towards others regardless of the situation and/or environment. To the seasoned nurses- please be pt with us newbies though we are all different ages as nurses we are children and just as you have to be pt with a young child learning to walk, talk etc we need you to be pt with us because we are just learning to "walk" as nurses. I guess we may even go through the "know it all" teen years lol. So just be pt with us we will eventually catch on and then maybe one day we will be intelligent, competent, compassionate and experienced and able to care for our "more seasoned" colleagues when they are the pts.

No it doesn't mean you failed. I took mine last year in June in VA. I don't remember what day of the wk or anything (I posted on here though so you could find out). Anyway I just knew I had failed because I wasn't sure of any of my answers and I kept getting very similar questions then the computer turned off at 75 questions. I cried all the way home (an hour and 1/2). When I called the next day it was not there nor was it on the website. I became histerical because some of my classmates had taken it and had their results the next morning. Long story short I finally got my results (via the BON website license lookup) and I had passed. I never was able to get it over the phone. Be calm, try to relax, find something else to do maybe something you wanted to do while in school and never had time for. Good luck!

Jen the RN2009 thank you for your response, kindness and compassion are things we can give for free yet we often have such a difficult time giving it to others. Crazy! Leslie :-D thank you also for your reply, you are right. I don't know anyones hx and where their views are coming from. I know there are many who have had far worst lives than mine and we all have our own way in dealing with them. I do hope that we all (myself included) put our issues aside when talking with pts and their families. After all nursing is supposed to include compassion, caring and respect. I hope I have not offended anyone and if I have I do appologize. The original thread was not meant to hurt, offend or in any way cause a negative response.

Never said I didn't have the ability to get angry or to express it on occassion. However that was not anger. Simply stating facts so there is no misinterpretation. As far as this having been asked so many times before, I am sorry to inconvenience anyone with a question that has already been asked. I didn't realize it had been such a topic for debate or whatever. It was not meant to irritate, put down, stir the pot or whatever I just wondered. So much for being a safe place to come to for answers/support. Of course just because someone asks the question doesn't mean you have to respond in anyway or even read the question for that matter. I guess there is something about the topic that does draw people in even if they don't want it to.