Background: I did adult med-surg for one year (mostly ortho). Jumped to NICU where I spent a little over a year, now am in my third month of PICU.
I have two preceptors, one who has been there for going on seven years, is a great nurse, but very particular about little things (like how the IV pumps are facing and where things are laid out on the unicell). I'd been told that she was tough and hard to work with, but I've found we actually get along decently well. She told me up front that she would let me know if I'm not doing well or not progressing as I should be, and she so far has said that I'm doing well and adjusting well, that she thinks I just need to get comfortable with pediatric diagnoses. She mostly lets me do my own thing unless it's something I haven't seen or done before, then she will explain it and have me do it and she watches.
My other preceptor, well, has only been there about 13 months and I'm her first orientee. I'm with her less than half of the time I'm on orientation, but she is difficult to work with. The communication...is pretty awful. For example, one night we were getting ready to take a patient to MRI. The patient was still awake and my preceptor told me to draw up a dose of rocuronium because the fellow wanted her to have some, to which I asked if she also wanted fentanyl prior to the roc because this patient was still awake. She raised her voice and said "Just draw up the roc." I drew up the roc, brought it over to the bed and had her double check it. She then says "What are you doing. I already drew up the roc. But okay just give it." Just to clarify (because I was being given conflicting information) I asked "Okay, so they want the roc now, correct?" and she goes "Okay, no, don't give it. She's still awake just WAIT." At this point I was so frustrated and annoyed that I just stepped back and got her transport monitor hooked up. The fellow comes in and asks if we gave the roc, and my preceptor asks me "Well did you give it or not?" and I said I was waiting to give it, like she told me to. And she goes "Oh my god Okay I'll just give it since you forgot to." I was SO CONFUSED. Even some of the nurses in the room helping told her afterwards that she wasn't making any sense. Every shift that I've been with her, she has been doing these kinds of things and making me feel like an idiot.
When I leave my shifts with my night shift preceptor, I feel like an absolute idiot, and I feel like a new grad again. I'm trying to tell myself it's not me, but it's really not making my transition any easier. My question is, does it seem like maybe they gave her an orientee prematurely and she wasn't ready for one? And should I go to my educator about it? I'm only with her for two more weeks then I'm with my main preceptor for the last 5 weeks, but I am having trouble dealing with these issues every time I work with her.