Hi there. This is my first thread I'm sharing. I'm new to nursing and new to the site. I had a rough day at work and I want to share my experience in hopes of learning from others.
My day started with a violent patient whom I had to call back up for. It really shook me up and it seems as though I never recovered from it for the whole 8 hours of my shift. He had dementia and had gotten upset/agitated and began to yell obscenities and come towards me. Other nurses came and it got de-escalated.
Later on, I went about my day, going through the motions. I work on a medicine floor and just got hired at my first hospital job about 3-4 months ago. It was brought to my attention that I wasn't communicating properly with other staff and they thought about reporting it to the manager. I felt targeted and bullied, coming from senior staff.
I confided in one of the nurses, the charge nurse, and asked, "What could I have done better today? This day was really rough." She had a good talk with me about how I was helped immensely for my other patients and not once had I asked if she and another nurse needed help. I felt dumbstruck, as this didn't sound like me. After my incident in the morning, I wasn't myself. I shut myself down and didn't communicate properly with my team. Their patients were borderline unstable and I was presumably in la-la land not yet recovered from a confused and violent patient.
I haven't ever cried at a job more than I've cried in nursing. I remember asking another nurse, "Is it normal to cry so much when you first start nursing?" I apologized to the nurses in question and said thank you for their help. They're all there to work as a team and help me along the way. Some days I wonder if I'm even a good nurse.
I was heavily relied upon because I was one of two RN's working on the floor and it seemed like I wasn't present. The thought that comes up often for me is the part about being a new nurse and a new hire. Some days I feel incompetent and that others question my care and knowledge. Some days are bad (like today) that I question it to! Maybe I didn't received sufficient orientation? Or that some things come with time and experience....