redheadrn86

Bare below the elbow. And 30degrees here. X

I'm an RN with a well controlled metal illness. Have worked in ICU/ED before taking 6months off to look after my mental heath when my Dad died. I've returned to an outpatient unit with nicer shifts, less stress etc to keep my mental health stable. In my new unit the staff don't know me or my history, I haven't had time to prove myself yet. I have some fairly visible OLD self harm scars, and short of covering them with tattoos there's not much I can do about them but regret younger me's choices. I've never had an issue with staff or patients commenting but suddenly I am. What's your opinion on an RN with selfharm scars? I'm not ashamed of my past if anything I appreciate the insight it gives me on the struggles my patients deal with. Do I cover them? Do I open up to the staff who ask questions? Do I just refuse to answer my colleague's questions?

Although I wholeheartedly agree with some of your earlier comments about choosing happiness, the end of this post completely floors me. You have a very interesting perspective.

It's not that I disagree, I just disliked how the assumption is that a young new nurse having issues fitting in must be a 'jerk'. We get enough crap from patients/management in this job without eating our own. I've recently moved areas- I've gone from control to chaos and while the nursing is my comfort, socially it's a shock to the system. My new colleagues are louder, harsher, crueler, and more judgemental than I'm used to but I'm also sure they'd the be ones I'd want in my corner if I needed back up (but they'd have to believe I needed/deserved it first). If I was 23 and just out of training I'd be kacking it to. She needs support not an attack on her personality. And Red'll do just fine :)

I stopped reading the comments here after the first page of "this must be your problem not theirs" when they've got so little evidence to go on- what a poor example of non-judgement. Actually this entire thread looks like an example of the crap that goes on between nursing staff. I'm really sorry you've found yourself in this kind of environment. Nurses have attitude in general and it helps with the job- I've gone from soft and nerdy to weird and vocal very quickly, but I think a lot of the stress of the job and the need to fit in make it similar socially to highschool with the cliques etc. If you're new and you stick up for yourself, particularly if you're conscientious and speak up for everyone when the status quo has been to just not rock the boat for example, you might find yourself in the firing line. Keep a record of incidents and your reactions to them- see if there's any link/triggers, speak with other newbies, is it something you can fix by changing your own behaviour (note not reducing your standards) or do you need to find a new job/speak to seniors? Whatever you do don't put up and shut up and definitely don't join in to fit in.

This is perhaps the most trivial issue I've had these past few weeks but its the one that's bugging me most- perhaps because I can't decide whether I'm justified in being annoyed or whether I'm feeling guilty for having an issue with it but here goes, fancy being my sounding board? I work on what is usually a very busy large general ICU, but has lately, bafflingly, been an overstaffed overflow of the step-down unit. I was covering a break for another nurse when he gave me a job for while he was gone. Infusion running out? Turn due? IVABX? Nope- phosphate enema prescribed 4 hours previously. I actually thought he was joking, and said as much but no he was deadly serious and he walked away. Just a little gobsmacked the female student he had working at this bedside with him and I got on with it. When he came back we politely (read: passive aggressively) discussed my issue, we didn't come to an agreement. His view- his patient was female. He is male. I wasn't busy, therefore I should do his enema. My view- all nursing care in the ICU is intimate, would he have another nurse do his checks and washes, catheter care and enemas for every female patient? He had a female student working with him, he could have used that as a teaching opportunity. It is a 'crap job' and handing it over is impolite, just not what you do if you give a rats about your colleagues. Should I ask a male nurse to do every enema on my male patients? And I'd have probably responded to the whole thing much better if he'd have asked me would I mind, or could you please rather than "I have a job for you..". I don't know whether I'd have reacted differently if another nurse had asked me to do this- one I know to be conscientious and respect. I wonder if my opinion on this nurse in general is colouring my opinion. I asked two very good nurse friends one male one female their opinions and got two completely opposite responses. Is this a gender issue I've never considered before? Am I just tired and in need of a good meal, good sleep and an interesting level 3 patient?