Published Jan 27, 2009
You are reading page 3 of Politely Refusing to Share Grades
I don't have a problem with sharing grades either. I'm not going to run around bragging that I got 100% because that might make someone who failed feel bad, but if someone asks me I don't weird out about it. Pretty much everyone in my class shares grades with each other. We figure if the majority of the class did terrible then there must be something wrong with the test itself or the way the teacher instructed the topic, and then we find a diplomatic way to talk to her about it. Or, if we all did really good, then it is kind of like a celebration in the hallway with lots of "Great job!" or "Good for you!" and pats of the back. It kind of helps build a sense of comradery. We are all in this together.
I don't get the vicious competition and secrecy amongst y'all. I can understand prior to nursing school when you had to be cutthroat about your grades in order to get accepted into the program, but that I don't feel that should be an issue anymore. We should be encouraging one another, pass or fail, without any of this highschool drama. And besides, if people think you are stuck-up because you got a good grade and they didn't, I imagine that they would dislike you even more if you sniff your nose at them with a haughty attitude and refuse to be part of the group.
My nursing school friends and I share our grades with eachother all the time. And people outside of our little group dont ask, and dont care! My friends and I share so we can support eachother. We usually have differeing weaknesses and strenghts, so when we figure those out we can get together and study.
I always ask how everyone did! I am just looking for an "I did well, ok, or not so good". I am not looking to see if I did better than they did. If someone did well and I didn't I ask them about certain areas and vice versa. (I normally do very well). Since this seems to be a touchy subject I may quit this practice.
p.s. I have a friend who normally gets the only A in the class and she doesn't want anyone to know. If someone asks she gives a vague answer. She is very smart and works VERY hard, she deserves her A.
I still don't say anything (2nd semester, still). I learned during the course of my first degree that it does not help ANYONE and it can really promote bitterness in those susceptible (not me and its not my problem though).
I just say "I did well, thanks for asking." Or I say "So glad its done! What did you think of such-and-such question?" I do offer to help if its a friend and I do keep quiet about my own grades. Otherwise others think you are bragging (which is classless if you tell a struggling student how well you did).
I do tell my mom, dad, husband and son.
Always try to help each other...you never know who is going to be a nurse at a place where you want a job someday...plus you'll feel good inside.
I always ask how everyone did! I am just looking for an "I did well, ok, or not so good". I am not looking to see if I did better than they did. If someone did well and I didn't I ask them about certain areas and vice versa. (I normally do very well). Since this seems to be a touchy subject I may quit this practice. quote]I think its a matter of finding a group of people that you can ask that won't get grouchy over it. My original point was that in a hyper-competitive environment people sometimes publicize grades to play head games with other students.
I think its a matter of finding a group of people that you can ask that won't get grouchy over it.
My original point was that in a hyper-competitive environment people sometimes publicize grades to play head games with other students.
I totally agree with you! I met someone in one of my pre-req's and became friends with her pretty quick. We shared grades right away and it became competitive almost immediately. We work together now but no longer speak. It's really uncomfortable.
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