Please help

[Hayz22]

Hi all,

I'm absolutely desperate for answers.

Up until I was 16 years of age (29 now) I was a fairly normal kid. Nothing out of the ordinary. One day when I was 16 I went ten pin bowling with a friend and as I went up to bowl I went extremely faint. Couldn't hear anyone and had to hold on to the wall to get to a seat. The feeling passed and I walked home and thought nothing of it. Just thought it was a one off.

The next morning I woke up and my world had changed completely. Everything felt like a dream. I went to get out of bed and could not walk, I was so dizzy. my parents called an ambulance as they suspected meningitis as I kept telling them to turn the lights off.

Ambulance came, said i was fine and left.

The next few years have been absolutely hell. I've gone from doctor to doctor to plead with them how unwell I felt. I was 16years of age and all I kept saying was 'it feels like a dream'. I was terrified. I was told I had anxiety and depression. I was shocked. I didn't feel anxious or depressed but you have to believe the doctors and so I was put on anti depressants. I didn't leave the house for 2 years.

Slowly I began to accept the fact that I was different. I googled and found the word depersonalisation. It suddenly clicked. That was exactly how I felt. Finally an answer but not an answer I was happy with. I have depersonalisation 24/7. Literally from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep. It's the most awful feeling in the world.

As a then 17 year old girl I used all my savings to have a full medical and a MRI of the brain. Of course it all came back normal. I was so frustrated. I cried and cried a lot of the time through fear.

Over time i learnt to accept that maybe it wasn't physical and that it was part of me. I slowly got a part time job but had to leave because I couldn't cope. Over the last 2 years I found my vocation in life. I became a carer for adults with learning disability's and I absolutely love it. I coped with the depersonalisation and threw myself into my work. I was so proud of myself for working all the hours of the day and making money and appearing 'normal'.

Sometimes I'd be working and this completely faint feeling would come over me, just like at the bowling alley.

I took annual leave for a few days a month ago and haven't been back to work since. On my last day of annual leave something came over me. I felt incredibly weak. I'd lost my appetite completely and food didn't taste good. Even the smallest tasks were hard for me and I'd feel completely worn out after doing them.

Now it's been a month and I don't feel any better. I'm on new anti depressants because the doctors and my family all believe it's the tablets. I paid for another MRI this week and all came back normal.

My doctor mentioned I should have an eeg as I was having strange 'seizure' type things. I would go completely blank, head heavy, eyes closed but still talking. This is a new thing for me.

I've always had involuntary movements in my body since I was young. Not massive but family have noticed. It's like my body cannot stay 100% still - something has to twitch. I also randomly get these internal shakes through out my whole body and my hands shake so much and fingers move involuntarily.

I'm positive i've got some sort of nerougical problem - ive never been seen by a specialst - doctors just keep saying it's anxiety. I feel like this 24/7. As soon as I wake up and when I've got nothing to be worrying about.

There was a thread posted by helloonurses a few years back and it was about exactly how i feel. And it happened at the bowling alley approach line. I've googled and googled for someone else like me and that was all I could find.

I've had all the usual blood tests that the GP's ordered. I'm praying that I will get enough posts to be able to message helloonurses and find out if her friends husband ever got answers.

Thank you for your time.

.

Any help or advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you.

[Nurse SMS, MSN, RN]

No advice unfortunately. We cannot give medical advice or conjecture as per the terms of service. Your medical providers will be able to answer your questions better than strangers on the Internet. I wish you well.

[A&Ox6, MSN, RN]

Absence seizures? I'm not giving medical advice, but that sounds similar to my symptoms that were eventually diagnosed as migraines and Chiari malformation.

Don't know how to link my article, but check it out. From Living to Dying and Back. Feel free to PM me

[Silverdragon102, BSN]

As per the Terms of Service of the site we can not offer medical advice. I strongly advise you to go back to your PCP and ask for help or another opinion