Online Support Groups = Trash on Nurses

Specialties Private Duty

Published

I joined a couple of closed support groups for families of PDN clients- some specialty groups like for trach/vent families, certain diagnoses that I work with, etc. I joined with the hope I could get some perspective from the parents, and learn more. Well... they call it a support group but more than half the time they just complain about their nurses. And holy moly, do these people nit pick over everything. They complain about negligent nurses, then the next post is a complaint about nurses who are too conscientious. Nurses that leave them high and dry when there's a foot of snow coming down. Nurses that have the nerve to go on missions to Africa for a month every two years. Nurses that call out sick. Nurses that come in sick. Nurses that don't know everything about their child right away and bug them with questions. And although some of these complaints/vents are valid, then the comments that follow are just a huge barrage of everybody talking about how stupid and clueless and irresponsible their own nurses are. Wow, I just can't believe they can't cough up something nice about their nurses once in a while.

Many of these families don't understand our need to follow the care plan to the letter. Tonight for example, a mom was mad b/c the child was desating and had to be bagged. The MAR states that protocol for that scenario was to call 911. The child was stabilized, but the nurse called 911 anyway. Mom was livid because the stupid nurse just couldn't understand that the child was doing better now and it was no longer necessary. Some of the advice she got was to call the doctor on Monday and change the MAR to state that in the presence of a parent, the parent makes the decision if emergency services are necessary. A lot of the responses just said that the nurse is too nervous, or a spaz, or just plain crazy. It makes me mad because these people have no idea the child's dx, the doctor might have that order in place because maybe he knows the mom is too blase or the child's condition isn't stable. In any event, they had no trouble disrespecting the nurse and her role. I spoke up and stated that if the care plan states that she had to call 911 and there's no concessions to the parents' say, then she has to do it. If she allowed the mom to bully her into not calling, and the child dies, would you be ready to stand up and take responsibility for your decision and not blame her and take her to court? I also recommended that she change the order officially with the doctor's written blessing, this will help the nurse help her. I pointed out that if I were in need of nursing for my child, and I couldn't get a perfect nurse, I'd feel better with a nurse who was too conscientious rather than a negligent one.

Specializes in Peds(PICU, NICU float), PDN, ICU.

If the agencies would give these families realistic expectations, it would help both sides. But they all promise the world to these families and then even the office staff doesn't want to deal with the monsters they created.

I would like to add a thank you to the parents that treat us well and work with us...if you happen to be reading this.

Specializes in Pediatric.
If the agencies would give these families realistic expectations, it would help both sides. But they all promise the world to these families and then even the office staff doesn't want to deal with the monsters they created.

I would like to add a thank you to the parents that treat us well and work with us...if you happen to be reading this.

Expectation management would go a long way in helping these situations.

Sent from my iPhone using allnurses.com

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