attending wakes/funerals

ozzie sue · Mar 15, 2003

I am a palliative care nurse but also relieve oncol. at times. I also find attending funerals of pts that i have known an extended time and developed a strong rapport, as a way of closure and puts my career in some sort of prospective. Families also feel special with my presence as we all become an extended family really. sue

FutureNurse2005 · Apr 17, 2003

I am not yet a nurse, but I know myself, and I can guarantee that I would do my best to attend, and if I could not attend, then a card would be sent at the very least.

The only exception would be if I did not have much time with the pt.

If there is a closeness with a pt, then by all means!

Hugs

rreed · Apr 17, 2003

I have never went to a funeral of a patients.

but something that really touched me

my bother's child (nephew) had cancer, found it at age 14 months, died at age 16 months old.

I was so impressed with the childrens hospital with the teaching of injections, taking care of the hickman, when they were teaching my brother and his wife how to put on gloves and keep them sterile, I just know this was a disaster getting ready to happen, but some how the educators did it.

day of funeral, I was sitting at funeral home and looked up and say one of the social workers, then another and a nurse, then was shocked to see his oncologist there and they all went to the grave yard which is way out in the country.

What really shocked me was that they all came and my brother and his wife are not rich people, they didn't even have any insurance or half way decent jobs when all this happened.

just thinking of this now I want to break out in tears to think how much they cared to actually make the drive 1 hr away from the hospital to show up.

renerian, BSN, RN · Apr 17, 2003

I went to alot of my patients funerals when I worked hem/onc. I had to in order to let go. The families liked us being there. It was very very taxing on me. I cried right with them.

renerian

LaVorneRN · Apr 21, 2003

I have never attended a funeral but when I was an aide and my first onc. pt. passed (about 7 yrs. go) after being with us for months, it blew me away. He had lung Ca and I watched him gasp for air till the end. He was so sweet(about 70) and always called his wife "his bride." I wrote a letter to his wife and children about my memories of him and how funny he was and never complained. Also I lost an uncle recently to cancer (he was like my dad) and I could imagine their pain of losing such an awesome man. Later she came to visit and left a gift for me and a note stating she read my letter at the funeral. Since then I have prayed with patients and families, comforted them, listened to them and my attitude toward death has changed. I want to be an oncology nurse and hopefully be a source of strength for those I care for.

renerian, BSN, RN · Apr 21, 2003

Lavorne that is a very nice story..........makes it worth it doesn't it?

renerian

LaVorneRN · Apr 21, 2003

It certainly does. Since then I have lost too many loved ones to one form of cancer or another. I worked on a hem/onc. unit for 7 yrs. and those nurses and docs are a special breed. They are the ones who encouraged me to go to nursing school along with my husband. I look forward to getting started.