OK really leave me alone already!!!

charebec65 · Feb 23, 2007

There's a girl in one of my classes who is failing miserably. I don't think that she's incapable, I think she's just a minimalist who really doesn't care to even do the minimum to scrape by. She doesn't do her study guides and she rarely comes to class or lab. She's not negative at all though....she's actually very friendly. However, I'm not sure I'd ever want her as my own nurse as I'm not sure I'd want a nurse with such a minimalist attitude who wasn't willing to even try to do what it takes to pass.

SummerGarden, BSN, MSN, RN · Feb 23, 2007

I agree with the others about not letting these people get to you! Their biggest problems are their attitude and their lack of respect for themselves and their peers. If they are sitting back and making fun of the rest of you, then they are spending WAY too much time paying attention to drama rather then trying to make sure that they know the material. :lol2:

I do not know if anyone in my class has repeated and I do not care! I need to learn the information and I need to be able to apply it to nursing, so I spend my time learning. However, I do understand what you are going through.

There are a few people who are negative and try to rub me the wrong way by making snide remarks or snickering when I mess up. I think it is because they think they know-it-all (most are CNAs, MAs, Medics, EMTs etc.) and do not like the fact that I can care less. They also probably resent the fact that I am doing better then most of them and as well as the rest despite my lack of experience.

In any case, I am not rude to them. On the other hand, I do not spend any time with them in school or after hours. A few of them I might say one or two words to per week because I have no choice. Others I have to work with in lab and so I use them as a resource despite my distaste for them as human beings.

Basically, I act professional at all times and I kill with kindness by staying positive and counteracting their comments with positive remarks (it usually makes them look like immature children). If I have to work with any of them in the future, I plan to continue to keep them at a professional distance because they are not trust worthy! Most of the ones I am talking about are egocentric and are not team players. Good luck.

shellsgogreen · Feb 23, 2007

i wouldn't pay too much attention to these students - nursing school is tough enough as it is without allowing negative energy to pervade your psyche.

we've had repeaters here and there - some grateful for another chance and very meek in class, others just plain angry and you know what, even they ran out of steam pretty quick.

try not to let this hinder your experience. best of luck to you

:beer:

Chantilly · Feb 24, 2007

I feel better knowing I am not the only one going throught this. I am trying my best to ingore them and keep my mouth shut...which is hard for me because I am usually the first one to open my mouth and tell people what I think of them or what they are doing. But I am trying not to draw that kind of attention to me...I don't need the instructors having a negative opinion of me. I'm just going to try to lay low but if this continues I'm going to have to do something about it..not sure what but I'm sure I will come up with something good. :devil: :devil:

Trauma_Queen · Feb 25, 2007

Yeah. To be honest with you, I never listened to advice, lectures etc. from the repeaters.
I don't know where they came up with the know-it-all attitude. Maybe it comes from insecurity but still ... it was kind of ridiculous.
I mean ... for crying out loud, they failed. If they really were so smart then they wouldn't have had to repeat.
So, IMO, they had no business pontificating to others about what they should and should not do.
:typing

Ok..I'm going to put my two cents in..

First off, the statement about having to repeat because they weren't smart enough to get through it the first time is really harsh and uncalled for..

I am a repeater...But it doesn't mean I'm not smart because I failed..I tried to do too much, I was working 40 hours a week plus going to school and thought I was strong enough to make it through..People fail for all sorts of reasons..Even a couple of my instructors have admitted to failing their first time in nursing school and they think I'm a strong person for repeating..And look at them, they are brilliant instructors...

You have to understand what these people that repeat are going through mentally...and no one will ever to be able to understand it until it happens to you..Failing crushes your entire world, especially when it happens in the final semester and you fail by tenths of a point..

I'm not completely justifying their negativity because at some point you have to learn to suck it up if you want to be successful. I'll be the first to admit that I was angry, bitter, and upset when I started back this past year..But I learned to accept the fact that I failed and I've continued..I am nice and respectful to all of my current classmates, but I feel annoyed at times because everyone knows I'm repeating. I'm all for good karma and helping someone when I can, so I give advice when I'm asked..But at times it seems I've become other classmates crutch to lean on JUST because I'm repeating..I've had numerous students approach me to ask me what's on the tests because I've taken all of them before so that they can get the best possible grade at my expense..I didn't have someone there before giving me all the test "ins and outs", so why should I help you and give you an upper hand..In my mind, that's almost along the lines of cheating..I've even had students ask me for care plans and various other assignments just to make their lives easier..I've never given any of them any assignments because that is cheating..So IMO, my being nice to my classmates has brought unnecessary drama because I'm the repeater that's seen everything, so surely "she must know everything to do"...

I have never acted like a know-it-all going through the second time and I don't act like I'm better than anyone else, because we're all in this together at the same time..But sometimes just stop and think what the repeaters in your class must be going through in their minds when you think they are being negative..It doesn't give them an excuse to treat you like crap and say unnecessary things to you, but this can give you a better understanding as to why they're acting negative..Like I said, it crushes your entire world when you fail...It took me several months to recover mentally...And I'm making higher grades than I ever have this semester because I have the will and determination to make it through this time..

Sheri257 · Feb 25, 2007

Ok..I'm going to put my two cents in..
First off, the statement about having to repeat because they weren't smart enough to get through it the first time is really harsh and uncalled for..

I see your point. Remember that the context of my remarks was about repeaters with a know-it-all attitude, which is what this thread is about.

I realize that all repeaters aren't like that and should have said so.

The word "smart" means different things to different people. I wasn't just referring to intellect.

I am not referring to you personally but, the fact is, some of the repeaters were just plain dumb in the sense that they didn't take nursing school seriously from the get go. They put everything off until the last minute, didn't get their assignments in on time, they went out partying all of the time and tried to scrape by with minimal effort.

To me, at least, that's just not very smart ... especially when it takes so long to get into the program. Every semester's delay is thousands of dollars of lost income. I just didn't think it was very smart of them not to take it seriously.

So ... I hope that explains the context of my remarks.

:typing

rpbear · Feb 26, 2007

I don't remember any repeaters with know it all attitiudes, but we had a bridge program with LPN's that joined us durring the second semester. SOME of these LPN's had an attitude of well I am allready a nurse, this should be easy. They were great at clinical and at skills lab, however, they soon found out that the tests were a different story. They soon started to join study groups and pair up with other students. The attitudes eventually faded.

It is very hard to bite your lip, but it is very important to decide what you want out of nursing school, if you want to be all wrapped up in the drama that happens that is easy. If you want to go to school, learn, and bcome a better person, then bite your lip, do you own work, worry about your own life and studies and graduate and become a great nurse. Please don't get all caught up in the drama, do waht you need to do and get out of there. Unfortunately this situation will come back to you when you get a job as an RN because there are people lke this everywhere, and then you will have to make the same choices again.

charebec65 · Feb 26, 2007

I certainly hope would hope that I won't give the know it all impression once I start the LPN to RN transition. I don't see that happening though. I took a 1 day class about CVA's designed as a portfolio class for the nursing students and RN's on Saturday. I quickly realized that we'd not gotten that far in depth in PN school. I did however learn some pretty decent critical thinking skills and that helped immensely.

dodgerla · Feb 27, 2007

I totally understand how you feel. The one in my class isn't a 2nd timer, but she works in a hospital and apparently that qualifies her to be an RN without the schooling that the rest of us have to go through, or so she thinks. I finally just had to ignore her, and you know basically she's not there to me anymore. I know its hard, because I have a very aggressive personality and only wanted to tell her to shut her gynormous mouth, but I couldn't. Just turn them off, and know that you're practicing and are going to make it through the 1st time and be happy that you know that you will not be one of them someday!!!

dodgerla · Feb 27, 2007

I totally understand how you feel. The one in my class isn't a 2nd timer, but she works in a hospital and apparently that qualifies her to be an RN without the schooling that the rest of us have to go through, or so she thinks. I finally just had to ignore her, and you know basically she's not there to me anymore. I know its hard, because I have a very aggressive personality and only wanted to tell her to shut her gynormous mouth, but I couldn't. Just turn them off, and know that you're practicing and are going to make it through the 1st time and be happy that you know that you will not be one of them someday!!!

luvmyguys · Feb 27, 2007

ok-so this may not be exactly the same situation-but I feel just like you do!!! My hubby has a friend who flunked out of a bsn program-well I am working on an ADN, she says that the reason why she flunked is bc her program was harder because it is a bsn program and "EVERONE" (her words) knows that thats harder. This situation has put a rift between our two families. Just the other day I was at her house and one of her church friends was there-who happens to be a nurse....well, after I left the room-for a split second, still in hearing distance-she says "she's only in an associates program.." I was pissed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :angryfire I left before ripping her head off-but I told my husband that that was the LAST LAST LAST comment I was going to take from her (he hates it too). I just try to be the better person and do my best because in the end, I will have my RN :nurse: and will have earned it!!!

Sheri257 · Feb 27, 2007

ok-so this may not be exactly the same situation-but I feel just like you do!!! My hubby has a friend who flunked out of a bsn program-well I am working on an ADN, she says that the reason why she flunked is bc her program was harder because it is a bsn program and "EVERONE" (her words) knows that thats harder. This situation has put a rift between our two families. Just the other day I was at her house and one of her church friends was there-who happens to be a nurse....well, after I left the room-for a split second, still in hearing distance-she says "she's only in an associates program.." I was pissed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :angryfire I left before ripping her head off-but I told my husband that that was the LAST LAST LAST comment I was going to take from her (he hates it too). I just try to be the better person and do my best because in the end, I will have my RN and will have earned it!!!

You raise a very good point and I've seen a lot of it at school and on this board as well. If some people fail or don't do well at something, it seems like some of them feel the need to tear other people down to make themselves feel better.

How many times have I heard that if you make good grades in school, that means you totally suck at clinical and won't make a good nurse. That only "C" students make the best nurses. Too many to count.

Or ... if you pass the NCLEX the first time then ... you're merely a good test taker who won't necessarily make a good nurse. You know ... maybe I just studied my butt off and did what I needed to do to meet the standards of my profession.

The funny thing is: if those of us who did do well said the same kind of things to those who'd failed ... and suggested that they'd make lousy nurses ... we'd be blasted all to hell for not being supportive.

I'm sure that failing is a crushing blow that's very difficult to deal with and I certainly understand that.

But, I don't think it should become an excuse to put other people's accomplishments down either. And it seems to happen all too often.

:typing