Human Resource Lingo

Nurses Humor

Published

Specializes in Everything except surgery.

"COMPETITIVE SALARY"

We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"

We have no time to train you.

"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"

We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.

"MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED"

You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED"

Some time each night and some time each weekend.

"DUTIES WILL VARY"

Anyone in the office can boss you around.

"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL"

We have no quality control.

"CAREER-MINDED"

Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

"APPLY IN PERSON"

If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE"

We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE"

You'll need it to replace three people who just left.

"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST"

You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS"

You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS"

Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.

:chuckle :roll

Having just recently interviewed for a job, this really hit home!

One of the favourite requirements in our company's advertisements. Now I know what they mean!!!!

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS"

Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.

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Specializes in OB, Telephone Triage, Chart Review/Code.

EXACTLY!!!!

Specializes in Everything except surgery.

I see these two a lot, and now I understand what they mean:chuckle!

"DUTIES WILL VARY"

Anyone in the office can boss you around. "PROBLEM-SOLVING

SKILLS A MUST"

You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

LOL Very true LOL

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