Nurses with depression

[grandmawrinkle]

Are you one of them?

What is your story?

Me: dysthymic disorder, likely depressive sx from the age of 10-12. Major depressive episodes: 2. Other psychiatric comorbidities: anorexia nervosa (currently, in longstanding remission.) Hospitalizations: none. Medications: on and off since 2001...tried just about everything. Currently just restarted a single antidepressant. Therapists I've been through: too many to count.

I honestly think I went into nursing, in part, because I didn't think I could do any better and I couldn't fathom working in a role where I would actually have to be a boss or make important decisions. I viewed nursing as very subservient and I was totally OK with spending my life in the background and taking orders (that is what I thought nursing was, at the time.) This was over 10 years ago now and I don't see nursing that way anymore, and I do think I have grown into the role to some degree, and I'm not as fearful as I once was.

It is taking me way longer to complete my graduate education than it should because I struggle with maintaining work/family/life balance. It is incredibly frustrating to know that you are really smart (I'm not going to go into that because you all are probably going to either think I'm A. inflating my intelligence or B. a pompous a#$hole) but you cannot manage to accomplish what you think you should be able to, given a normal mood. I'm not even going to talk about my undergraduate education....lets just say I took more incompletes, part-time semesters, etc. than any human being should. I would have graduated when I was 40 had I not had PSEO credits. Fortunately at work, I have not struggled....I think the nature of shift work allows me to be able to put on a happy face for 8-12 hours.

I hesitate to post this because I'm sure there are plenty of people out there that aren't sympathetic and don't believe that depression is a real, legitimate problem. I just feel like such a failure right now because I went to the doctor today and got back on Wellbutrin .

:crying2::crying2:

[modnini1]

There is a form I have to fill out of all the meds, rx or otc, I've taken in the last 30 days. It is listed as part of the preemployment physical. I suppose that counts as asking. Thank you very much for your advice.

[Rene829]

i am currently a school nurse for a special needs school and this is my first job working as an rn. i was diagnosed with panic disorder (according to dsm) about 3 months ago. in the beginning when it started (could have been caused by a combination of things) i did not know what was going on or what was causing me to feel like this.

i took off of work to get my bloodwork done and i made an appt. with the gyno to see if its hormone related. i figured i would make all these med appt's while i wait for a psychologist!

in the meantime i was prescribed buspar 20mg qd...lexapro 5mg qd...then told to try some bc from my gyno. i felt like an experiment. at times the physical symptoms would subside but then i would think of morbid stuff. so yea i still had general anxiety which i still experience on a daily basis.

anxiety/depression/ocd are def all interrelated from my own experience at least. once i started taking the ssri i was getting just plain disturbing repetitive thoughts that i could not escape, mostly death-related. i believe talk-therapy is very beneficial and i made the decision to start weaning off the lexapro. those of you that are thrown the anti-depressant/ssri just make sure you are seeing an experienced therapist. my family physician was so quick to prescribe me the ssri and it just did not sit well with me. anxiety/panic disorder stems from somewhere and solely taking an anti-depressant to "feel good" will not help in the long run. you have to get to the bottom of it and talk it out.

i understand what every one here is going through and my heart goes out to you:redbeathe every day is a struggle for me but i still have to function as a nurse and be productive everyday:nurse:

....the thoughts come and go and i wish it would just stop but its so hard:mad:

aside from some deep breathing when your getting an anxiety attack just remember and say to yourself...

"it's only my anxiety, it cannot harm me, and it always passes"

i look forward to responding back to every nurse out there going through this.:)

[ms_orion]

Renee ... RELAX! If a medication is prescribed for you by your physician and you do not experience any side-effects that may compromise your or a patients safety...THERE IS NO PROBLEM. NO. You do not give this information to Human Resources (or anybody else for that matter). The Employee Health Nurse will interview you. THAT IS THE ONLY PERSON YOU NEED TO TELL. I was concerned as well, when I applied at my first hospital job. I was taking anxiety medication, and Hydrocodone (I had been taking for about 3 years due to spinal injury). It is confidential..it goes into a seperate record with the Employee Health Nurse. NOW: I was worried. I asked the Nurse if taking these medications were going to disqualify me for the job. She smiled at me and said, "Honey, if taking (prescribed) medications were an issue WE WOULD NOT HAVE ANY EMPLOYEES HERE". It is okay. Relax. My advice is do not discuss any of your personal health issues with anybody except the Employee Health Nurse. Nobody else has the right to know. Some of the (many) gossipers will just take information you provided to them, just in general conversation and the whole unit will know. Then, if you are not in the "clique"..just like Jr High School ... they will try and use the information against you at somepoint. (I also am diagnosed with OCD, PANIC DISORDER, DEPRESSION, and SPINAL STENOSIS). Relax. WE (caregivers) ARE HUMAN TOO. I hope this helps you.

If you are indeed depressed or have a diagnosis of any psychiatric issue (anxiety, whatever...taking the medication is IN NO WAY a "HAPPY PILL" like some people believe). The problem stems from lowered Serotonine levels. If you are not depressed...you will not feel any difference. Sort of like taking an aspirin...if you have a headache, it may work...if not....no detrimental effects to your health. My advice to you: Take the medication...get any counseling you need. If the medications somehow make you have unpleasant side-effects, discuss this with your physician. (I have been there too- - A LOT of us have been there). Take care of YOU first...ALWAYS! I had the tendency to work to provide for others and neglect myself and right now, I am on leave...physical and mental exhaustion. So, take care of YOU...then you will be able to take care of everybody else and enjoy doing it. Okay? Good Luck!

[subee, MSN, CRNA]

There's a big difference between taking anti-anxiety drugs (actually they help you think more CLEARLY) and taking narcotics while on the job. Maybe you're only using it at night? If a nurse has such major pain issues that narcotics can be detected on a drug screen while at work, you should find another job in nursing that doesn't aggravate your pain. You can lose you license. Just because a narcotic is prescribed, doesn't mean that you are "covered" to use it on the job.

[nola1202]

everyone should remember that subee is addressing the OP, who has a dx of dythemia, not major depression.

in that case subee's obs are pretty much on target. and the big girl panties remark, i presumed was aimed at the unwillingness to continue meds.....

and your point is?

[Wishinonastar, BSN]

There's a big difference between taking anti-anxiety drugs (actually they help you think more CLEARLY) and taking narcotics while on the job. Maybe you're only using it at night? If a nurse has such major pain issues that narcotics can be detected on a drug screen while at work, you should find another job in nursing that doesn't aggravate your pain. You can lose you license. Just because a narcotic is prescribed, doesn't mean that you are "covered" to use it on the job.

If that were so, which it is not, the anti-anxiety drugs would not be primary drugs of abuse. They are depressants like alcohol, and they certainly do NOT make you think more clearly. If you make a mistake at work while you are on them you will be drawn and quartered, and hung out to dry. Prescribed or not. I understand lots of people need them, but they are supposed to be short-term until you get therapy or some other way of controlling your anxiety.

Yes, I have suffered from anxiety my whole life. It stinks and I wish I could go around in a anti-anxiety fog too, but I can't because I have to have a life. Not a muted existence. Try calcium with magnesium. Try exercise. Try therapy- talk to someone about your maladaptive coping. Try homeopathic remedies. Drugging yourself up at work is risky for you and your patients.

Narcotics when used for chronic pain lose the effect of the "high" feeling over time. If you need them to function for physical pain I think that you should be able to take them and work. Understand though, that I sympathize more with physical pain than mental pain which is often self-induced from torturing ourselves with self-doubt and insecurity. Both are equally disturbing, but with mental pain you have options on how to handle it. Sometimes it means changing jobs.

Antidepressants are an absolute necessity for many people. I have tried them with absolutely no relief from anxiety so I know they do not help me. If they help you then stay on them by all means. When people go off of them I have seen some bizarre reactions. And don't go around telling everyone about it! People never treat you the same after they know about your issues.