No confidence...Please help!!!!

mochamonster · Mar 15, 2010

First of all, you went to nursing school, not medical school. When people come to you with medical problems, you should not feel bad about not knowing what is going on with them. They really need to see a doctor (or perhaps an NP).

Secondly, there is a reason there are so many specialties in nursing. No one could know everything about everything related to nursing. An OB nurse is not going to know what an ED nurse would. It's apples and oranges. Don't let this undermine your confidence, you will get the hang of it. We are all learning, even the seasoned nurses. Keep your chin up!

SummerGarden, BSN, MSN, RN · Mar 15, 2010

i agree with the above. why do you think as a nurse you should have an answer to every question???? what ever happened to i-don't know-i-have-to-look-that-up or what-did-your-doctor-say? patients will ask you questions all the time and the right answer is not always the direct one. you will need to know how to assess your patients properly, look up the correct answer, and answer them in such a way that it fits their situation and their ability to learn. fyi, if you tell a patient or family member something that causes them harm, you can be sued and/or lose your license. thus, for now stop answering people's questions until you get a better sense of your scope of practice, become comfortable with your skill set, and are able to find a job where you can grow as a nurse. gl!

cherrybreeze, ADN, RN · Mar 15, 2010

Agree with the other posters, you went to nursing school, not medical school!! If you don't have the correct answers to the health/medical questions posed by friends/family members, that isn't a reflection on your nursing abilities....they need to take those questions to their physicians. Straight up. I get questions from my family frequently, sometimes I am able to answer them and guide them, sometimes not (esp my sister's questions...she'll ask about her kids, and about things like rashes....I don't do peds, and skin problems can be so vague/varied!). She doesn't usually take my advice anyway (example: my nephew twisted his ankle on the playground. She wonders if she should take him to the ER. After hearing all of the details, I told her that IMO, he had a sprain/strain rather than a break, and suggested RICE for a day or two. She took him to the ER anyway, and guess who was right? :rolleyes: ). On the other hand, I work on a med/surg floor, so when my mom had gallbladder problems, that was pretty obvious to me. Her doc wasn't testing her for that but rather treating her for GERD, but I suggested things she could do at home, meds, elevating the head of her bed, etc., to ease her symptoms. Once she finally had her gallbladder out, I was able to answer questions about her post op course, since I literally take care of lap chole patients every shift I work, dang near. But, there's plenty that I DON'T know, and if I don't, I simply tell them that. I don't have an MD behind my name to diagnose problems, and neither do you. Don't sweat it.

cherrybreeze, ADN, RN · Mar 15, 2010

i really hate this because i made all a's and one b in nursing school but i realize that either i do not have much common sense or it is just my bad memory because right when i passed the nclex and became a nurse all my friends and family ask me medical questions when they are sick or having problems and it is really hard for me to answer correctly. i'm just no good at it and it makes people wonder what i learned or how i made it through nursing school. this really hurts my confidence. the funny thing is i never even had a slight problem in nursing classes or clinicals. i am trying to not be so hard on myself because i have never had a nurse job before and i am still looking for one. is this going to get any better with experience or was i just not meant to be a nurse? this makes me feel bad. i'm wondering whether i should consider going into another field. please tell me honestly what you think!!! thanks so much for any advice!!!

as far as this statement......do they say this to you, or do you assume that's what they're thinking? if they're flat out saying it, tell them where to go. stand up for yourself, as their expectations of you are completely out of line.

constantlylearning · Mar 15, 2010

I have felt this way also. Unfortunately, when some people see a person with low self confidence or low nursing confidence they go for the JUGULAR! I have personally up to this point of my life haven't been able to tell them where to go or to leave me the hell alone. We will get there ....one day! I wish this for you.

LeaRNed · Mar 15, 2010

Sometimes it is hard to articulate what you know. I have that happen to me sometimes where I know the answer but have problems explaining it. I think it will get better over time as you start having to explain things more.

marty6001, EdD, EMT-P, APRN · Mar 15, 2010

What horrible responses?? Medical school does not make one have all the answers, nor does nursing school.. People ask you questions because they trust your education and your title. That alone should give you confidence. If nursing school taught you anything, and hopefully it has, it has taught you it is ok not to have all the answers, just that you know where to find them, and more importantly when to say "I don't know"... As an APRN there are plenty of times I just don't know... And that is fine.

Pick your head up. Realize that as a new nurse you are expected to know how to do a physical assessment, vital signs, chart, and to learn the skills needed to improve your critical thinking skills every day. If your frustrated, read up on topics you don't know. If you don't know the answer to a question someone is asking, have the confidence to say I don't know, but I'll try to find out for you.

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN · Mar 15, 2010

As the others have stated, you did not go to medical school. Even physicians don't know the answer to every medical question. They frequently look things up in reference books.

Don't put so much pressure on yourself to know everything. You can't. And, as others have mentioned, it is perfectly okay to say "I don't know."

Johnnyonthespot · Mar 15, 2010

First of all if you have yet to find a nursing job you are a graduate nurse, aka a student nurse with a license that is safe enough to practice. Therefore, your relatives and friends need to chill. secondly (and you'll find this to be true once you get a job) you have to believe in yourself and what you are saying before someone else will believe you. This is what confidence is all about where I work (ER) and it is much needed. It gives patients the satisfaction and relief that "all the bases are covered and I can go home and sleep tonight." I've seen dr's, rn's, and np's that speak to pts w/out confidence all the while speaking up to date, correct and useful information and the patients don't believe it or feel comfortable. Just believe in what you say, because if you believe it then it will come off in a confident manner. Good luck Ive been there.

Johnnyonthespot · Mar 15, 2010

and for the people that ask "how did you make it through nursing school?" they can shove it because you made it. You have the title, now its time to polish it.