New RN grad... hired for an amazing job, but need advice!

[brs72007]

I have discussed my situation with friends and family, but would like an honest opinon from fellow nurses. I just graduated in May, passed my boards and have been hired at an amazing hospital with the job I wanted. I'm suppose to start orientation next week. Now i'm having huge doubts on whether i can fulfill my obligations... Here's my situation (sorry if this may be long and confusing) I have a 5 year old son who will start kindergarten this fall, my 3 1/2 cannot get into preschool because our area's state funds are next to nothing and only taking 4 year olds and 3 year olds if they are really behind. I'm due with our 3rd child (unplanned) in september. I was very suprised that i was even hired b/c of my pregnancy and the fact that i will be just barely getting done with orientation before going on maternity leave and technically will have to be re-hired when i come back to work 6 weeks post-partum. I haven't had a job since pg with my son 5 years ago and have never had to go back to work/school that early from having a baby. Fortunately I have a great husband who supports what ever i do, but also works long hours and is not home very much. That leaves either me with my children or sending them to daycare (which we pay an obsurd amount for!) Thankfully we have been able to make it on just one income, but it's been tight so adding another income was going to help out a lot!

1. I'm super nervous about starting my job! (is this a normal feeling?)

2. I'm extremely tired all the time b/c i can't sleep due to being uncomfortable from the pg... i can barely make it through the day just running after my kids let alone working fulltime as a nurse in a busy high accuity hospital

3. Daycare while i'm at work... 3/4 of my income will be going to just that

4. My son is going to need a lot of support and help adjusting to kindergarten

5. My husband and I don't want our 3rd baby going to daycare at 6 weeks... and that is what i told my boss that i would do when i was hired

BUT.... are any of these a good reason to quit my amazing job before i start? I'm worried that by doing this... another employer or the same hospital would never consider hiring me again. Also i'm very worried about loosing my newly learned skills and knowledge and be an unsafe nurse when i do go back to work.

Anyone have any advice for me??

Thank you in advance :)

*Becca

[DeLana_RN, BSN, RN]

Hi, Becca,

you will probably get more responses if you post this in the general nursing forum. But I'll be glad to give you my opinion, as a fellow mother (my twins are about to start kindergarten) and nurse.

You say you have some serious doubts about being able to combine a first job in nursing with caring for 2 (soon 3) young children; you do have some valid points. New grad orientation is very intense; you don't say what kind of position it is, but I assume it involves 12-hour shifts, possibly on nights. Does your hospital have its own daycare center? Otherwise it can be difficult to find care for the long hours involved (and especially when you're new, 12-hour shifts don't always end after 12 hours). Your kindergartener's school may offer before/after care, but again hours vary and don't agree with 12-hour shifts. Obviously you were able to attend nursing school, but the hours there may have been more suited to traditional daycare. Do you have a realiable support system (family, friends) who could help you out with caring for the kids? Also keep in mind that sick kids are not allowed to attend daycare or even school and you would need to have someone who could help you out it this case. Yes, you can call in sick of course, but I don't have to tell you that your sick days will be limited (and calling in too much won't make a good impression) and kids can be sick quite a lot.

Also, you will be starting and possibly completing your orientation (how long?) at the end of your pg; then you would be on leave for 6 weeks (which you think is too short anyway, and I have to agree), which means you won't be able to start practice on your own until after a long break (it's long when you've just learned new things and are trying to remember them). This is not an ideal situation.

Frankly, I think all of the reasons you list are good enough reasons to reconsider this position. However, there are also other considerations. How supportive is your new manager? Is this your dream job, in an area/department/unit which rarely has openings? Are you lucky to have gotten any job as a new grad in your area?

As for reconsidering the acceptance of this position (since you haven't started yet, you haven't cost the hospital anything, which is good), I don't think it would leave a bad impression; quite the opposite. Many women are not able to work in late pg for medical reasons; I think your fatigue is reason enough. The hiring manager must want you very much to have hired you despite your obvious condition; this is a good sign (she's supportive of nurses who have young kids), and tells me that she should be happy to wait for you to start after your maternity leave. But of course, she may have to hire someone else instead, and I don't know when you would get another chance; however, she can probably give you a good idea.

I hope this helps a little. Best of luck to you, whatever you decide. Keep us posted, and welcome to the profession!

DeLana

[Jules A, MSN]

I'm kind of surprised you even applied for a job with all you have on your plate! If you really want to work as a nurse, the money would help and it sounds like this experience would be excellent so I would hate to see you pass this up. FWIW and I know this might not be the most popular sentiment but I believe there are times that our families have to be willing to make sacrifices for what will be the best in the long run. Good luck with whatever you decide.