New nurse not ready

[Portperry09]

Hello all! I'm new here but I've been reading allnurses for years now. This will be my first post...

I guess I should start with saying how much I love to nursing school and how great I was at it, I graduated this past April and started my first job, full-time float position in October. I had 12 weeks of training but it definitely did not prepare me for my float position. The 12 weeks was in just two units, a medicine unit into surgery unit. Since then I have floated all throughout the hospital. I am a Registered Practical Nurse here in Ontario but in the hospital I am in, the scope is identical to that of a registered nurse however we do not float to ICU or NICU/L&D.

I took this position on the float team because it was a full-time position, however every single day I find that I am crying and dreading going into work, it is always so hard, and they always pile on the hardest assignments, and sickest patients. So many times I have been in over my head and needed to get assistance but find it extremely difficult because the floor nurses don't know you because you are a float nurse as well as a new graduate. Like I said, I have been in this full-time role since October, but only on my own for the past month and a half, I definitely had a panic attack before work today and I am definitely considering quitting. I am searching for other jobs but it is very hard to find another full-time position. I am sure I could potential he be good at the job if I put in the time, but I am not sure if I can deal with the stress and anxiety that comes every single day. I feel like I am not good enough, not strong enough as a nurse and not prepared enough to deal with these patients and patient loads. I used to love nursing and now I honestly don't want to be any part of it. Everyone says this is a standard feeling for a new grad, but I feel so terrible I don't know how people could continue nursing after this feeling... feeling lost and confused.

[loriannprice, BSN, MSN, RN, NP]

Oh Portperry09, my heart aches for you! I was in a similar situation for my very first nursing job, I lasted less than 3 weeks. It was awful. I was blessed to speak with an experienced nurse/friend who said if I felt like my license was in danger (which I did) then it was up to me as to whether I stay or go. Nobody would stand up for me like I could. I am so disappointed no one has told you what it would be like in the float position, in our hospital system, they won't even let you be on the float team until you have 2 years experience! I won't tell you what to do, but I'll tell you what I did. I quit. And the next job I applied to (a proper residency program that was highly structured and able to be extended if I felt the need) I was completely honest with them. Told them I had been put in a dangerous situation as a new grad taking care of IMC and VERY sick med-surg patients, and they were very understanding. I haven't looked back with a single regret. Hope this is helpful!

[TriciaJ, RN]

There is a reason many of us believe float pool is not a good new grad position. Too stressful learning the ropes on one unit, even after you've learned the routine and how to find everything. Even when you work with the same people consistently enough to find some mentors.

Now you put a new grad into a different situation every day, new people, no friends or mentors. You spend half your shift looking for stuff. OP, is there any way you can land a regular job on one unit? I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.

[NICU Guy, BSN, RN]

New grads should not be in a float position. You need consistency in a unit with co workers that can be a mentor and a resource person to learn nursing and get a solid foundation. Every 4-5 months when we are slow, I get pulled to either PICU or a Med/Surg floor. Today was one of those days. I had three patients: two 5 month olds and a 2 month old. They are not too much bigger than my normal assignments in the NICU. The whole day was stressful, not because of my assignment, but having to learn the way "they" do things on the unit and the location of everything I need. I have 3 years experience and it was stressful for me. You can push through being a float nurse and eventually you will become more comfortable as you spend more and more time on each unit or transfer to one of the units that is your favorite and settle down and get comfortable.

[NurseMoneyTalk]

I'm sorry to hear that. I'm also very surprised a hospital would let a new nurse work float without experience. If I was in your situation I would try to talk to my director and see if I can get support there. If not I would tough it out until I could find another job. I would be looking and asking everybody I knew if they know of a nurse opening.