I recently moved to my second nursing job and I am very discouraged. My orientation was extended two more shifts. I think I made a mistake coming here. I could really use some words of encouragement right now from nurses specifically.
I have been struggling with my mental health for a while. social anxiety/general anxiety and depression. I feel like I’m always on the brink of crying. I am working on it with therapy and medication, but it’s a long process. Nursing is not the cause of course, but it’s definitely putting it’s toll on me.
I came from my first nursing job at a very large teaching hospital. High acuity patients, we drew all our own labs, lots of bed bound patients etc. in general busy place to work. constantly understaffed and pressuring me to do a bunch of overtime. but, tons of new grads like me.
new job is a smaller hospital. More support staff like CNA and phlebotomists. More walky-talky patients and elective surgery patients who go home after a night. More down time, for sure. But there is new stuff I have to learn, for example I never really had stroke patients or ortho patients before bc they used to go to specialized units at my old hospital.
I applied here after only 10 months of experience at my old job. I wanted to change jobs so I could be closer to my support system (my parents) and I thought a smaller hospital that didn’t have nurses do overtime might be less stressful, which I think may have been a dumb idea.
I think I made a mistake by leaving so soon. I left after only 10 months of experience. I should have stayed until I felt more confident as a nurse. I felt so overwhelmed & constantly busy at my old job, but the culture was great and I was surrounded by other baby nurses who understood as well as experienced nurses who looked after me and were always willing to help me and teach me.
The hospital I work for now is not used to new nurses. I am by far the most inexperienced on the unit. during my orientation I lack confidence, especially with the types of patients I’ve never had before. they are treating me like a new grad. They extended my orientation which I think is making things worse in a way because I get very nervous from hovering. I think I could do better with some space but they don’t agree.
Then more nervous I appear the more they hover and take over my job for me. I was trying to admit a patient but they wouldn’t let me do it, they interrupted me, kept saying I have to do this first no this first why haven’t you started asking her questions yet etc when I was just trying to get her settled in. Later that shift the patient didn’t want me to start her IV because she didn’t know if I should do this by myself since “all the other nurses were telling you what to do earlier” I’m decent at IVs but after she said that I felt so defeated because I knew she didn’t trust me. I was so nervous when starting hers my hands shook.
Yes I lack experience. I am soft spoken but I’m trying my best to improve my communication skills. I think I am a competent nurse. I’m kind, I am thorough, I’m safe, I check all the orders and make sure things are done. I ask when I don’t know something. I’m a little slow doing admissions but in general my time management is good. I need to improve on some of my knowledge, for example get better at performing stroke assessments. Really there is a ton I don’t know yet I admit, but I’m wanting to learn. And I think there’s a lot I do know, like maintaining insulin and heparin drips, chest tubes and trachs etc that we never get at this hospital. I don’t think I’m in an environment where people are as willing to teach me anymore. They expect me to know it all and give me this look when I don’t, I’m very discouraged.
I am frustrated and tired. I am so disappointed that my orientation was extended, other nurses are treating me different now. I try to remember the good things about myself but I can’t help but feel like a stupid nurse. I can’t help but take on the doubts other nurses have of me. I am so anxious thinking about work I can’t relax on my days off. I feel like I made a mistake leaving after only 10 months.
I know I need to be strong and be more confident to get through this but I’m feeling defeated right now. My mental health is at an all time low, I can’t be alone bc my thoughts get to me too much so I have a very hard time at night when my parents are asleep and I cry a lot. If anyone has similar stories or advice or anything to offer my right now I’d be really grateful.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
I think your biggest problems are a less-than-assertive personality and learning-curve-itis. Time and experience alleviate both of these.
The plus side of your former job is that they were used to new grads. The downside is that it was just too crazy.
I think you did a smart thing to take your current job. Extra help and lower acuity are golden. But please accept the fact that you technically are still a new grad. Cut yourself slack. Cut your new coworkers slack for not being used to new grads.
Keep reminding yourself about what you already do well. I think your biggest challenge at the moment is to project a bit of confidence. Fake it till you make it. I predict a year from now you'll be just fine in your current job. Hang in there.
TriciaJ, RN
4,328 Posts
I think your biggest problems are a less-than-assertive personality and learning-curve-itis. Time and experience alleviate both of these.
The plus side of your former job is that they were used to new grads. The downside is that it was just too crazy.
I think you did a smart thing to take your current job. Extra help and lower acuity are golden. But please accept the fact that you technically are still a new grad. Cut yourself slack. Cut your new coworkers slack for not being used to new grads.
Keep reminding yourself about what you already do well. I think your biggest challenge at the moment is to project a bit of confidence. Fake it till you make it. I predict a year from now you'll be just fine in your current job. Hang in there.