Latest Comments by OncRN10

OncRN10 413 Views

Joined: Feb 7, '11; Posts: 1 (0% Liked)

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    I am a semi-new grad (May '10). I worked as a nursing assistant in a hospital for three years during college and, while i didn't LOVE it, I didn't hate it either. I recently started working on an oncology unit as an RN at a large university hospital. Oncology was not my first choice, but after searching for a job for 6 months, I figured I would give it a shot.
    I have now been there two months, just finished orientation, and I find it completely horrifying and cannot wait to leave. I absolutely hate it - the patients are way too high of acuity for me, and during my 7 week orientation I already had 2 codes (and with each, a panic attack). Every time I start to feel comfortable with what I'm doing, I have a patient crash, and I end up crying during the whole 40 minute drive home. I feel like I've never had so much anxiety/depression/confusion as I have from this position. I was very active during college, involved in SNA and student council and wanted to go to grad school, and now all I want to do is get as far away from the bedside as possible. I really don't think I can handle doing this, and all I want to do is find a job outside the hospital. my husband and friends keep telling me that I should just wait it out and things will get easier for me as I adjust, which I'm sure they would get easier, but I hate it so much that I feel like I couldn't handle working there 10 more months to finish off a year's experience. I've been looking into jobs outside the hospital, but it seems like they all seem to want acute care experience...
    Does anyone know of positions that are open to someone with a BSN that don't require hospital experience? Or do you think I just need to get over myself and stick with it for a while?