Long Whine....
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Today was a really sucky day. First thing, during my med pass, the maintenance man tells me that a resident died in the night that I was particularly attached to. After that I just kind of felt like not being at work. I was really expecting her to come back to the Nursing Home today.
Then I got two readmissions. During which my ADON and a med rec person and another nurse got right in the middle of. I was grateful for the help but their chaos disrupted my organization. I had things ready to go and they were in the middle of it making a mess. I finally just walked away.
One of the aids was ignoring me when I told her Ms so and so needed such and such and so and so had to be positioned in such a way per PT.
There were bells and noise, screaming and yelling and accusations from another resident. I snuck into the med room and sat on the floor and cried for a few minutes. It didn't solve anything but it made me feel a little better.
I hate health care today. Right now today as I am sitting here I am trying to find a way out of this awful mess called nursing. I have No time to talk to the residents, no time to do more than a quick assessment, shove thier pills in them and keep walking.
My adon told me that I had to find a place within myself where I could be content with touching a few rather than all. I don't understand what that means. I want to be able to take the time to sit and talk with each resident at least fifteen minutes every day with out interuption. I want to talk to Mr So and so about the WV game that went into triple over time, and Mrs So and so about the new crosstitch book her daughter bought for her. I know she was trying to tell me that there is only so much time in a day and that other things have priority.
I am not sure that I am still nurse material, and I am considering giving it up.