how long to take off after a baby?

[adpiRN]

My husband and I are brainstorming ideas on how to make it work if we have a baby next year.

At the moment I work full time day shift and supply our health insurance (which is great).

My husband is working from home, starting his own business which is just starting to gain steam but is still far from stable or financially secure enough to support both of us.

I'm turing 30 soon and want the option of 3-4 children and would love to start trying to get pregnant this summer.

In my ideal world my husband would have the income, and ability to get health insurance, that I could take off as long as I want and go back per diem when I'm ready. But if I want a baby soon that may not be possible by the time I have a baby.

1 option is I could take off just the 12 weeks for FMLA, thus keeping our insurance and go back to work part-time after that. But leaving a baby after 12 weeks seems sad, even if just for 2 days/week.... My mom could probably help take care of a baby on days I work though which would help.

Or if we're feeling a little more financially secure with my husband's business by the time I have a baby, I could take off longer and use COBRA for our health insurance. I've heard COBRA is expensive. Does anyone have experience with how much it can be a month or does it vary widely?

We have enough savings that I COULD take off several months without pay, but we obviously don't want to blow through most of our savings and health insurance is a big concern for me.

Sorry for the vent, just wondering how other nurses make it work with combos of FMLA, COBRA, full-time, part-time, per-diem etc And how about breastfeeding/pumping while at work? I've seen nurses I work with pumping in the lounge or even having their baby brought to them for feedings, so I know it can work.

It's hard to plan because I'm talking about actually having a baby sometime in spring/summer 2012 and a lot could change with my husband's work situation before then, either good or bad. But I don't want to wait years until his work situation is completely stable because I see how hard it can be for some women in their 30s to get pregnant and I'm scared that will be me. Plus I just want a baby! (occupational hazard of L&D. haha)

[evolvingrn, BSN, RN]

cobra can be about a thousand a month for a family (depending on plan). my dh is also starting his own business and we are having a baby. Im not sure if you have done the homework for insurance for the self employed but its pretty unreasonable at this point and time (and now that obama's full idea for health plan does not look likely there isn't a lot of hope it will improve) for us im working 12's for the insurance and working days that are 'slower' plus my every other weekend so that we don't have to do day care. we also will have in home care for several hours on those 'slower' days so he can still work. ( i work nights so i will still be here) i am taking unpaid leave for my maternity and saving up my vacation as well so that i can have lots and lots of vacation time that first year (we get about five weeks a year and i rolling over at least 3 weeks from this year) Good luck.

[NPvampire, MSN, RN, APRN]

I had like the worst situation...1st time baby was a surprise right out of nursing school and the only job I could find when pregnant was part-time (no vacation pay, no FMLA, no nothing). I was off 5 weeks post c/s and then went back again part-time. It was too soon for the shifts (12s or bust) plus my awful drive. I continued to do part-time of various jobs and amounts up until 2nd baby (had FABULOUS understanding employer then) and then went back at 5 weeks again (sigh yes, post c/s all the unpaid leave I could afford) but started at 4 hour shift fill-ins and worked up.

Pumping at work depends on your employer...all of mine I had to hide out somewhere, sometimes in the bathroom with a manual pump, on my piddly lunch break. Sometimes on weekends I'd get lucky and use the manager's office. I guess now there are laws to give "enough time?" I am unsure, but "enough time" may not be enough for your particular body.

Also, I HAD to eat meals when I was still breastfeeding, so I was often wolfing down my food at the same time as pumping since they used to only give one break. If I didn't eat, I would pass out.

Fortunately, my spouse has always had insurance so that hasn't been an issue. Before his job, our COBRA was $873/mo for a brief time.

With your experience, can you get a Baylor job somewhere? Work 2-12s, get paid big bucks, and maybe get insurance too? If I had been experienced I might have tried that. I don't have Baylor, but I have been working weekends for 2 years to "tag you're it" with DH on the baby care.

It's tough. I have actually wanted to go full time b/c my dream employer ONLY hires full time, but I just can't see a 40-hour week with young children and a fulltime spouse.

[VanLpn]

i think it's sad that you have to worry about things like health insurance coverage while trying to plan time with your baby. my wife(an rn) and i are considering having another baby and if we do she will take the full year off that that she is entitled to. she'll get maternity benefits the whole time and the nursing union tops up your wages to 90% for 4 of those months. of course being in canada, we don't need to worry about medical insurance.

[merlee]

I was the sole support when I had my first baby. Took off 10 weeks post c/s, went back to work full-time. Stopped breast-feeding a few weeks later.

Got pregnant again 5 years later. Another C-section, again went back to work about 10 weeks later. Breast-fed a bit longer.

Everything is possible, but compromise is a must.

[mama_d, BSN, RN]

With baby #2 I took off 8 weeks (could have swung 12 but I was going insane sitting @ home).

He was exclusively breastfed till he was 9 months old. He didn't wean completely till he was 18 months old. I was like a freaking cow...gimme an empty supply room, a breast pump (Avent Isis) and ten minutes and I'd have 12-18 ounces. I was working 4 12s a week shortly after going back.

Hubby and I did the tagging in & out at the door for a while, till he got laid off and is currently a SAHD.

[Bobbkat]

I'm due in 2 months, planning on taking 12 weeks off, then I'll be back to work. I plan on taking my pump to work and pumping. We always have lot's of staff in various states of pregnancy/maternity leave/pumping and the floor is very supportive. Being in the NICU with pumping rooms available is pretty helpful too, I must admit. I pumped with my daughter and had no problem. She was exclusively given breastmilk for a year, and I had tons and tons of milk. My pump was me BFF : )

COBRA is expensive, how expensive will depend on what your current coverage is, since it is an extension of your current care.