I am nurse and caretaker to a partially mute male, 14 years old. He has failure throughout his body, including problems with digestive and nervous and vital systems, and I must tend to him.
He has good skills and intelligent and mentally independent. He can do and enjoys doing puzzles or hand activities, but can only do so much due to low coordination. He understands language and he can make noises that resemble words, however does not speak much. He prefers to make sounds or be silent.
I massage his belly to bring about eructation (burps) and flatulence and to improve digestion. I also massage him daily to help with digestion and circulation and to soothe him.
I handle hygiene and intimacy. I give him physicals or check ups once a week. I bathe and groom him regularly and take good care of his skin. I diaper him since he dislikes bed pans or catheters. Not to mention he does have sexual insecurity, even with puberty, so it is even worse on that part. I occasionally administer enemas or laxatives also.
We've agreed that it is acceptable for me to spoonfeed him, since he has poor coordination. Often he can feed himself but requires assistanxe. Although I do respect him and I assure meals are satisfying.
I do talk to him kindly and considerably. I communicate with him and make sure I know what he needs or what he wants me to know, even though he has difficulty replying or talking. He cannot communicate easily but he is very intelligent and he has a very active mind. Even though his body cannot function correctly, his mind and feelings are still working fully. So I am concerned. He does enjoy the care. He likes massages and such. He knows he can trust me and that I can help and comfort him. He knows I will respect him and do what he needs.
However, things can be too overwhelming, like my "full control" or his overdependence. I feel as if I invade or put too much pressure on his will.
Please help me. How can I keep his dignity intact? How can I help him yet allow him to not feel like he nothing?
