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i decided to start a new thread rather than offending anyone who has been participating in other threads. i need to get something out in the open and this is it:

if any of you caring for elderly or debilitated residents are having trouble being compassionate towards your residents then you need to get out of the profession.

residents act the way they do for a reason and we may not always know that reason but we must always think and act in a non-judgemental, compassionate and empathetic manner. anticipate their needs based on past behavior patterns. go see them 15 minutes before they start complaining. even a better idea: go see them for no reason other than to say hello and give them a hug. the results are often profound.

if you don't know what empathy is, or feel no compassion for the situation of the vulnerable and less fortunate, then just get out!!

if you don't realize that every single resident in your care is vulnerable and less fortunate, then you need to just get out!!

the residents and our profession will be better off without you.

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Specializes in Gerontology, Med surg, Home Health.

Hmmm. I must disagree. Not all residents have a reason for acting the way they do, unless you consider dementia a reason. I agree with being non-judgemental with people who have no idea what they are doing, but I will not be non-judgemental with alert, oriented residents who treat my staff badly...who say they are there for us to "do" for them. I will be very judgemental with alert, oriented bigots or people who have abused their wives for years and now think it's OK to treat my staff in the same abusive manner.

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Hmmm. I must disagree. Not all residents have a reason for acting the way they do, unless you consider dementia a reason. I agree with being non-judgemental with people who have no idea what they are doing, but I will not be non-judgemental with alert, oriented residents who treat my staff badly...who say they are there for us to "do" for them. I will be very judgemental with alert, oriented bigots or people who have abused their wives for years and now think it's OK to treat my staff in the same abusive manner.

ITA!

Some people are mean all their lives, and they stay that way when they get old. I do not believe in the old excuse as illness and/or infermity as a reason for being mean or abusive.

I treat all of my pts with respect and dignity and expect the same. When any pt is abusive or inappropriate, I let them know in a civil way that that kind of behavior is not appropriate.

I have submitted written complaints on several alert and oriented adult pts who have been sexually inappropriate and/or verbally abusive with staff.

Setting limits as needed is crucial.

Additionally, many nurses and CNAs who start their careers with a great deal of love and compassion for their pts lose some of it after years of being short-staffed and overworked.

There are sometimes when I do not feel much compassion at all for some pts, but I do not let it affect the care I give them.

Most seasoned nurses feel this way at one time or another.

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Also, I have seen many a staff member who spends their time chatting and socializing with residents, but slack off on their duties.

Hugging, joking and chatting w/ residents is nice, but it does not make up for them not getting their meds, bathing, incontinent care, etc.

Caring means taking care of pts, not just chatting with them, as some I've seen seem to think.

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Specializes in LTC.

When those who are currently working in LTC are overworked and underpaid it's hard to keep that compassionate spark alive your entire shift. While I adore my residents very much, and respect them all, I can't be 14 places at once. If I know the little old lady in room 204 will probably need to be toileted soon, I can't help that someone in 213 is incontient of BM and that the fall risk in rm 207 is on the floor again, and that the resident in rm 203 is stuck to my hip because she woke up and has no clue where her family is and wants me to find them or take her home. Chances are I'll get to the sweet little old lady in room 204 late and a bit worn out.

Don't get me wrong. I completly agree with you. These people deserve all the respect in the world and problems should be prevented not solved, but when your nurses and aides are so overstaffed these simple things sometimes become impossible.

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After 23 years in LTC I have seen my share of slackers, workers who let others carry the brunt of the load. I have often gotten angry and upset by this. One time i particular that I remember, a male CNA was just sitting in the hallway in a rocker next to a resident who was, we thought, basically unable to express or communicate in any way, she would just sit and rock all day, no facial expression, no verbalization. As the Shift Supervisor I went over to the CNA and asked him to please get up and help the others with care. As he began to stand, the resident reached out, touched his hand, SMILED and said one word "Please?" Maybe I was a terrible Supervisor, but I let him sit there for another 15-20 minutes until she was ready to stand and be accompanied back to her room. Every now and then, I think that these types of "slackers" should be allowed to slack off, just a tiny bit, if they can perform this kind of magic.

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After 23 years in LTC I have seen my share of slackers, workers who let others carry the brunt of the load. I have often gotten angry and upset by this. One time i particular that I remember, a male CNA was just sitting in the hallway in a rocker next to a resident who was, we thought, basically unable to express or communicate in any way, she would just sit and rock all day, no facial expression, no verbalization. As the Shift Supervisor I went over to the CNA and asked him to please get up and help the others with care. As he began to stand, the resident reached out, touched his hand, SMILED and said one word "Please?" Maybe I was a terrible Supervisor, but I let him sit there for another 15-20 minutes until she was ready to stand and be accompanied back to her room. Every now and then, I think that these types of "slackers" should be allowed to slack off, just a tiny bit, if they can perform this kind of magic.

That is so wonderful!! It makes me smile to read it!

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After 23 years in LTC I have seen my share of slackers, workers who let others carry the brunt of the load. I have often gotten angry and upset by this. One time i particular that I remember, a male CNA was just sitting in the hallway in a rocker next to a resident who was, we thought, basically unable to express or communicate in any way, she would just sit and rock all day, no facial expression, no verbalization. As the Shift Supervisor I went over to the CNA and asked him to please get up and help the others with care. As he began to stand, the resident reached out, touched his hand, SMILED and said one word "Please?" Maybe I was a terrible Supervisor, but I let him sit there for another 15-20 minutes until she was ready to stand and be accompanied back to her room. Every now and then, I think that these types of "slackers" should be allowed to slack off, just a tiny bit, if they can perform this kind of magic.

NICE story, NICE supervisor!!

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I agree that you have to be empathetic, kind, and patient and treat ALL of your residents with dignity and respect, but this can be a very difficult thing sometimes. From experience, I can honestly say that LTC workers are as close to saints as you can get. Some residents just make it sooooo difficult to be good. I will never forget the sweet little old lady who would "dig herself out" and smear bm everywhere (all over the bed, bedding, wall, her self, her hair -- EVERYWHERE). One night, she had done this for the third time, and the CNA caring for her asked her, "WHY do you do this?" The woman's reply -- "Shut up. It's your job to clean up my sh*t":devil: . The resident obviously had some dementia, but she was "with it" enough to come up with that reply. Very frustrating:smackingf .

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