Is buying a present for a pt. appropriate?

[estrogen]

I have this one pt. who I really like very much. He is an about 80 y.o. quad on a vent and has been in the facility for years. His mind is so sharp and he so hungry for company, conversation and any kind of information, yet he has no one to visit him. He likes to read and he is very religious. Would it be inappropriate for me to buy him, say a really nice bible? I remember something being said in nursing school about receiving or giving gifts to/from pt's is inappropriate.... What do you think?

[estrogen]

I have no idea why I'm being targeted. I'm only trying to help. I was not the first to mention books on tape. Honestly, with nurse staffing the way it is these days, who in the world would assume there would be time for someone to come and turn the pages of a book for this man? That's why the tape was suggested instead. And the reason I recommended inspirational stories was because my grandmother was deeply religious, and when she wasn't reading the Bible, she was reading inspirational stories by Christian authors. It was just an idea, a suggestion!

I know you came here to ask about the ethical issue of giving gifts to patients, not about the appropriateness of the Bible. But some of us mentioned that it might not be a good idea. It's just our opinions, we didn't misunderstand your original question. It was just that it sounded like a double whammy - first a very generous gift (you said it was a very very nice Bible, and those aren't cheap) and then it being a Bible on top of that.

We're just trying to help here. If you don't like our advice, don't take it.

You seem really on the fence about giving this gift. Just don't do it, and then you won't have to worry about it. Or if you do, give it totally anonymously, and never admit to him or anyone else that it was from you.

Good luck.

I'm sorry that you feel attacked. That was not my intention.

[Chaya, ASN, RN]

What I am unsure about, and am trying to find an answer to, is the appropriateness of any gift to a patient such as mine in general.

See, I'm asking myself, what if he starts to think of me as a friend? What if I become "important" to him? ....Then, one day, what if I go to another job an he never sees me again? Could I actually possibly hurt him with my gift? Sometimes, humanity requires courage. and I don't know if I posess such courage.

Estrogen-

Sounds like you are already important to this patient. If you were to leave I think he would remember you always and just be grateful you touched his life. Follow your heart on this one. Which would you regret more-giving this gift OR knowing you had the chance to and did not?

[BittyBabyGrower, MSN, RN]

We do it all the time....especially if it is a family we have gotten close to, we'll buy a book or an outfit for them.

I had a nurse in the LTC that took care of my dad...she would bring him little things and it just brightened his day! I loved that someone cared for him that much :)

I have received small gifts from parents also...nothing extravagent, and usually of the food persuasion that is shared with everyone :) Several of us have had cards with money...we turn that over to the NM to put in the general fund, monetary gifts are a huge nono!!

I say go with your heart...you care for this person :)