I'm 36, starting second semester. My friend visited my from New York this weeks, he is a Nurse Anethetist, god, and does he have money. And he is 3 years younger than me. I just feel like I have done nothing with my life. Most men my age have houses, nice cars, trips, nice things. I'm barely paying my bills. I just waited too long waiting on fire dept to happen, and maybe spent too much time dancing on the disco box shoving anything white and powder like up my nose, and not, I'm here with nothing to show for it. Its mainly the age thing that bothers me.
Thank you for posting this. Like many others on this thread, I am older than you and I guarantee that I am in a worse starting position than you. That said we all have to start somewhere, sometime. Take a look around, there will always be someone who "has more", is happier, taller, stronger, smarter, and so on. For the same token, there will always be someone who has less, is more depressed, shorter, fatter, etc.
Take some time to wallow in self pity, but remember that feeling of despair and desperation. If you can do that, you will be able to draw upon it later as a reminder of how things "once were"
The only thing you have control over are your own actions. Your destiny is in your hands. Only you know what will provide you the happiness you seek be it money, power, fame, or a family with the house & white picket fence and even at 36, that is likely to change!
Set goals, work hard, and enjoy the things that make you happy. Life is an evolving process, don't place your feet in a bucket of concrete and watch it pass you by.
One more thing, I wrote this reply to myself as much as I am saying it to you.
Good luck and best wishes for the success you're seeking.
I feel your pain....I am 36 and sometimes wonder where did I lose my way. I got divorced, lost my business, i'm in debt and had my house forclosed on. To say the least I have been humbled. Yet I am grateful for every bit of it because it has pushed me to pursue my dream of becoming a nurse. I start school in January and i'm so excited, yet realistic about the difficulties that I may have. Take a deep breath and focus on the small blessings and think about all you have accomplished! :icon_hug:
don't worry about others have accomplished... this is your reality, focus on your goals. and how you are going to accomplish this. my mantra was "failure is not an option" money is an issure... i sold my business after paying off debt there was very little to show for it.
i sold my insurance agency dec of 03. after 4 months of settling the new owner in. i started looking at my options. if i didn’t have health insurance my profits would be eaten up to quickly. my husband and i are older i was 45 and he was 50 it is really hard to find affordable health insurance. i knew i wanted to go into nursing so i started at local nursing home in may of 2004 as a na-r, i needed health benefits and they had a full time opening on the noc shift with benefits. i do not sleep well at night so i thought it wouldn’t hurt to give it a try. na-r is very hard work. i knew that my body would not tolerate this for long. i enjoyed the residents and liked this kind of work.
i started the lpn program in aug of 2004. my hubby was not happy about me wanting to go to college. he thought it was too much for me to handle. i had signed up and promised i wouldn’t go if he said no… i missed the 1st week of school because he couldn’t make up his mind, monday morning i told him that he better tell me if i could go or not and he wouldn’t say anything so i took that as a yes and went to college…. i went to my 1st class and it was nursing 1 the instructor took attendance and afterwards she asked me to pick up my books and step out into the hall she said that i couldn’t start a week late that they have already taken a test and i missed the lecture. so i didn’t say a word and went to the councilors’ office and asked if there any of the programs in this college that the student guide didn’t applied to. he said no, so i turned right around and went back to the class. sat down asked if i could have the power point. and she handed it to me. after the lecture she said i would need to take the test tomorrow. i said fine. i took the 1st test and the second test on the same day… i failed the first test because they take 10% off for taking it late. i got an 80% (a c ) on the second one. so i just plugged away… continued on.
at midterm my instructor pulled me aside and told me i was at a high d… i asked her if she was kicking me out. she said no because i had perfect attendance. i told her that it’s not over until the fat lady sings and this fat lady hasn’t sung yet!!! i paid for this and i was going to go to the end even if i failed it… i would just take it over if i had to.
working night was tough !! because it was so easy to fall asleep in class. i started bring lots of goodies to class. granola bars. fruit, chips. bottles of water. … and i would share them with the students around me if i dosed off they would fill in my notes… they thought i was crazy but they respected me. (some of the students worked part time in the same nursing home that i did) at the end of the semester i had a b in that class. i studied my butt off. i got a 98% on the final.
the second semester i took 3 classes online a&p ii, psycho social, & med terminology that helped with the sleep issue. i could do them on my own time.
our school has open enrollment and i took 18- 21 credits a semester i graduated with a 3.5 gpa in three semesters partly because when i was a student there 27 years ago i was a straight a’s at that time. i believe during the lpn i had a 3.0
i continued taking my co required pre- req. classed so that my work load would be lighter later in the rn program. i worked 5 nights a week as the charge nurse on the night shift. and 3 day shifts. i was accepted into the part time program. so my rn program was 3 semesters long. i only had the core classes left…. thank god. those classes were the hardest classes i have ever had.
organization was one of the keys to my success i bought a large day planner. everything about school and personal life was in it. i knew when my tests were and when projects were due. if future papers were on the agenda i kept a list of ideas or things i would like to research. i always kept in mind what my future practice would entail. (geriatrics) it was the hardest thing i have ever done. i had many struggles though it
i worked for local nursing home full time. i work 10 shifts per 2 week period. and usually work 1 to 2 - 12 hour shifts if someone called in. i graduated with a 3.12 i didn’t get any time off. with school and work it was 12 days straight until my weekend off. i told the “kids” the other students that this is just a short blip in my life and i will get through it. i graduated in may of 2007. took the nclex the same day my 1st granddaughter was born…(i knew she was in labor but she and my husband did not want me to postpone it) well i took the test and made it back to my daughters side to have my hand in on the delivery. (another story some day.) i found i had passed the nclex the next day.
that’s my story.... yes keep going don't stop... it is so easy to let life get in the way. and you know what… what other people think is unimportant. the rewards are great. i finally have job satisfaction!!
Don't look at the past... all you can do is go forward, brother. Only look at the past to learn a lesson from it and then walk differently in the future.
You are not old. I am only 26 and I know 36 is not that old. You aren't a spring chicken but you got a lotta good years ahead of you so do something you love with your life. But don't get caught in the trap of thinking you have done nothing just because you don't have nice things. Most people with fancy houses, good paying jobs and nice possessions are uterly miserable. In fact some people with those things are more miserable because our society tells us you will be happy if you have nice things so once you get those things you realize that they don't change a thing. Do you understand what I'm saying?
If you do what makes you feel happy in your life then you can be living in a cardboard box and still be happy... you may have it hard but you will be happy and thats what matters. Trust me, the happiest I every was in my life was when I was traveling around the country, living in the woods without two dimes to rub together... I was poor but free and it was wonderful.
But don't go into nursing unless it is really what you want to do because it will just make you more miserable. Find out what you really want to do then do it and be ready to sacrafice your comforts for it.
flaco
5 Posts
MedicJohn,
Thank you for posting this. Like many others on this thread, I am older than you and I guarantee that I am in a worse starting position than you. That said we all have to start somewhere, sometime. Take a look around, there will always be someone who "has more", is happier, taller, stronger, smarter, and so on. For the same token, there will always be someone who has less, is more depressed, shorter, fatter, etc.
Take some time to wallow in self pity, but remember that feeling of despair and desperation. If you can do that, you will be able to draw upon it later as a reminder of how things "once were"
The only thing you have control over are your own actions. Your destiny is in your hands. Only you know what will provide you the happiness you seek be it money, power, fame, or a family with the house & white picket fence and even at 36, that is likely to change!
Set goals, work hard, and enjoy the things that make you happy. Life is an evolving process, don't place your feet in a bucket of concrete and watch it pass you by.
One more thing, I wrote this reply to myself as much as I am saying it to you.
Good luck and best wishes for the success you're seeking.