I need help vs do it for me

I hear you. When I'm working with a nurse like that, I just spend as much time as I can in my patient rooms.

Sometimes I think to myself how much thought must go into this approach. If you would just do it yourself!

It seems to be the newer nurses off orientation.. Like did I miss a class that instructed you on how to finesse your coworkers and sit on your discharges so everyone else gets new pts instead of you? Lol I'm just grouchy today. ...more.coffee.

Sometimes I ask for "help" when I don't really need it- like placing a foley in that young, extremely anxious female or dropping an NGT when it's been a really super long time since I've placed an NGT, and the patient is one of those super duper anxious people that make you anxious too. Some of my coworkers have more of a clue than others and understand when I'm needing technical assistance vs. moral support.

I think if you're dealing with newer nurses, maybe you already do this, but I would coach them. First I'd say sure I'm happy to help, get everything ready and then I'll join you. Make them get the foley kit and prepare the patient, and then you just come in and supervise and give them pointers. Sometimes it's just a lack of confidence, and if you allow them to get out of doing the task themselves, you're not doing them any favors. They need to do it.

And don't let them get away with sitting on their discharges either! If you see they have discharges ready to go, say "Oh, you have a lot of discharges here. Let me help you. I'll go discharge room 7 right now, while you do room 10.".

One of the biggest favors a more experienced nurse did for me when I was new in the ED was, he made me do an ABG. He told me the patient needed an ABG, and I was going to do it. I said "Oh, I've never done one before, I think I should just watch." He said "Nope, you're doing it" and dragged me into that room and made me do it (he coached me through it, of course, to make sure I did it safely and correctly). A similar thing happened with my first RSI. The nurses that made me go into that room and do new things taught me how to just suck it up and get in there and do what you need to do. They were there- they had my back and would stop me before letting me do anything unsafe, but they did not let me just sit in the background and watch, and I'm grateful to them for that.

99% of the time, what goes around comes around. If I help the other RNs on the shift, they help me. Sometimes they don't ask, but you just know they are tied up in a room, and a new patient is put in another room of theirs, get that pt started for them, and they can do the same for you later on.

There are a couple nurses I don't do this with. They tend to be resource black holes. One asked me to help put in a foley, next thing I knew she was giving me a list of tasks that needed to be done to her patient and she had left to go treat other patients of hers. The interesting thing is that all of the nurses tease her about this behavior, it doesn't seem to change it but it does make it easier to deal with that we all know about it and are open and upfront with her about how she is a resource black hole.

I just steer away from helping her when I can. If she has a critical lvl 1 pt come in, of course we all go in and help as needed. But I try to be out of there before I somehow get roped into doing more.