I Hate My Job!!! Someone Help Please!

meownsmile, BSN, RN · Mar 28, 2004

Other than going to your nurse manager and making their not helping an issue i dont know what to say except stick it out the 6 weeks and hope it goes fast. Dont make it a racial thing though because that will surely follow you to any other department you choose to move into. Even though that may be the case, and it might be very obvious that they might be making it a race thing, you be the bigger person and leave that problem with them. Let that be their problem not yours, and leave it there when you leave.

pilatesRN · Mar 28, 2004

First, I just want you to know that you are 22 and a new nurse. There are people that will not like you for that. I was 31 when I became an RN, but I looked much younger and ran into that as well. You just need to learn as much as you can to prove yourself while being exceptionally kind to those with less rank or education than yourself. My techs, ward clerks, secretaries, and nurses know that I respect them and appreciate them. They try to do things to help me out because I care about them and the well being of the patients. It will take patience and time to win their aproval. Pray about it and God will give you the answer. Do not make assumptions. Accept others and they will accept you or at least respect you.

I never expected life to be like this!
I've been out of school for about 19 months now, all the while working on a pediatric hem/onc floor in a large teaching hospital. I'm at the point now where I'm chemo certified and I often do charge at night when a senior nurse isn't working. I'm finally semi-comfortable with what I'm doing, but now I hate it! The problem is, I like the kids, the work isn't what I mind. It's mostly who I work with. I find myself often working with a group of people who won't lift a finger to help. I would have to come running out of a room screaming for help for anyone to notice that I needed a hand. I think that's pathetic, especially when I frequently offer my assistance to others. It's to the point now that things are so bad, I turn my mental stress into physical ailments. For example, I was supposed to work a 12 hour night shift tonight, but I woke up in the middle of the morning with an excruciating headache. Despite the pain medicine and an ice pack on my head, it only got worse so I was forced to call out. I don't have much sick time saved up so this is going to be a problem if it continues. I've applied for another job, but I'm going to have to stay on my floor for another 6 weeks. I know that I can make it through that length of time, but I don't want to! I receive no respect from my co-workers, even the secretary gives me a tough time! They pick on me about pieces of my personal life they've heard and it really bothers me! Another problem is that I often have to work with a group of people that are very racist. If you are their race, you have no problem, but for people like me, we're the odd ones out. It's a black/white thing most nights I work and it gets old. Can anyone give me some advice to help???

jkaee · Mar 28, 2004

I remember how that was........I graduated from nursing school when I was 20, and I was working as the charge nurse on a floor that had LPN's that had been working there longer than I had been alive! I, too, had to go thru some really rough times, and although I stayed there for 2 years, and worked my way up to unit manager, I never did have the respect of all the workers on the floor. I think that it's mainly an age thing, because 9 years later I don't ever really run into those problems anymore. But I know what you're going thru! I understand that it's a really tough time for you right now. As soon as you can, leave the unit and try to find a place to work that has a larger percentage of new grads. The seasoned nurses on a unit like that will probably be more patient, and you will have other new grads to support you.

Hang in there! It does get better with time!

Jennifer :)

yaddadoit · Mar 28, 2004

I just resigned from a work situation that I found intolerable. I was so miserable that I couldn't stand to wait for the nurse recruiters to find me a different position and gave my 2 week notice. I'm not a new nurse, nor am I young. I understand what it's like to feel that rotten! I think it's horrible that some nurses treat their coworkers like this. I have also found it somewhat fascinating that such dysfunctional behavior is out there, so started doing a little research. Do some searches online for workplace bullys and bullyism in the workplace. There is some excellent information out there. I wish that nurses would become more aware of bullyism issues as there is a lot of it going on, but it is very subtle. Often times the person who is being victimized gets the blame for being a trouble causer, not fitting in, not doing their job and is made to feel miserable. Until someone takes a really close look, the victim looks like the source of the problem, just maladjusted. In reality, often times the victim is just that... a victim. Good luck to you!

moia · Mar 28, 2004

I have seen it too. I got all my specialty certification and training in the US and when I came back I was shocked at the outright hostility of a lot of my co workers.

Once I settled in and made it REALLy clear that I would not put up with anyones crap most of the staff settled down too. Ofcourse there were a few that never got any better but I just ignored them completely.

I have decided that people will always be hostile at first, they have all their own weird paranoia. I refuse to become a part of their little world and that seems to make them more comfortable.

The problem with your situation is it's too late to school these people. They got away with their bad behaviour for too long and they are now entrenched.

When you get to your next job you must be clear about your boundaries. I know no one wants to start a new job and have attitude but you must not allow anyone to get away with crap you would punish your 5 year old for.

If you are really clear about what you expect your coworkers will settle faster. There is always a testing period in the first weeks and how you behave in that first two weeks is going to define how these people respond to you. Be really clear about when you expect help and when you don't. I guarantee you will hear " well we don't it THAT way here" a hundred times a day, be really firm if you don't agree.

I would love to fine nurses a hundred dollars every time they say "thats not how we do it here" or worse "not my patient" .

I wish you good luck with your new job, be optimistic but be practical, let your new coworkers know you are not going to accept bad behaviour.

Tweety, BSN, RN · Mar 28, 2004

Take care of yourself and find an environment that is supportive. It's going to be stressful, and there's always going to be those who don't help, but finding a team that has even a few who help is like finding gold. Good luck.

CseMgr1, ASN, RN · Mar 28, 2004

I know what you're going through. Back in '75, my (ex-) husband and I had just bought our first home, having moved out of a trailer. I had been working part-time for the first year we were married, but was forced to go to work full-time, in order to get it furnished. Anyway, I went to work at a small community hospital about 15 minutes from where we lived...and, right away, it was made well known to me by the other nurses who had been there forever that I was an outsider, and they went OUT of their way, to get rid of me. Nothing I did was right. Then, on top of this, someone kept scrawling the word "B.S." on my time card. I reported it to the D.O.N., but she did nothing. Finally, after one extremely difficult day, I went home and cried in the arms of my (ex-) husband all evening. I didn't EVER want to go back to that place, but I knew I had to, because there were bills to pay (of course). He suggested that I "kill 'em with kindness", and then if that didn't work, he gave his blessings for me to look someplace else to work.

So, the next morning I went into work, my mind made up that I wasn't going to let these b-----s make my life miserable. Right away, one of the Senior Staff Nurses started in on me, as I had been assigned to pass meds with her that day: "I thought you didn't like working the floor", she commented, scathingly sarcastic. I turned to her and responded in my best professional tone: "I do what I am told to do", grabbed my med cart and pushed it out of the med room, and left her standing there.

After that, things began to change. The anonymous scrawling on my time card stopped. And, not only did this nurse (and others) stop picking on me, she and others became some of my best friends...and remained so, until I left this hospital 7 years later. It's just a shame, to have to put up with this crap, to begin with.

guest22304 · Mar 29, 2004

I see you're from NC, surprise, surprise. Ha ha, no really, I think every place has people that are lazy. My girlfriend is an LPN in a big Virginia Hospital and moved floors to get away from trifling, lazy people. She LOVES her new floor and they all get along great. I think it just has to do with the mix of people. If you only have 6 weeks left, I would kill them with kindness, and make a point to pull the LAZIEST & SORRIEST one aside and tell her how much you appreciate all her help and hard work. Say it sincerely and see what happens. Then offer to help them. You may be surprised. GOOD LUCK!!!!!

:)