I feel like such an idiot

Specialties Geriatric

Published

Long story short, I had no clue that Bacitracin is the active ingredient in antibiotic ointment. And got my head bitten off by the nurse who took the order because I ordered it from the pharmacy instead of just grabbing it from our on hand supplies. She felt I was questioning her order by ordering it without "knowing if she didn't order it, it was for a reason", and that I should have called her at 10:30 at night to clarify it with her. I dread going into work every day because simple errors are treated like you overdosed someone on insulin. And I'm only 3 months into this job as a new grad, and I feel like I just have to take it. I try my best to just own up to my mistakes and make sure they don't happen again, but I feel like such crap when it happens. I have 45+ residents to see in my 8 hour shift, with several that I have to see multiple times through the night. I feel like I suck at being a nurse, and can't believe I didn't know what Bacitracin was.

I'm here to tell you that you aren't alone in that feeling. As a new grad myself, I have gotten chewed up and spit out by the other nurses and supervisors for some similar reasons. It's a learning experience and we are bound to make mistakes and it won't be the last time we make mistakes. I think as long as we haven't caused irreparable harm and learn from these mistakes, then all will be well. For me, it sometimes feels a little stressful as I feel like they want me to function at the level of their seasoned nurses and I know right now that is not just going to happen overnight. Just try to remember that they saw something in you or else they wouldn't have hired you. Try to find some support in the other nurses. There's bound to be at least another nurse who can answer your questions. Don't be afraid to admit what you don't know. Sure they may looked shocked but remember that you're still getting used to the medications and have only worked with them for 3 months versus other nurses years of exposure to these meds. I always ask questions about all the meds I don't know and I'm sure they are tired of me always asking. I just wanna make sure for the safety of the residents. Just think, one day you'll look back at this and chuckle about not knowing what bacitracin was. It'll be a little story for you to tell future new grads to help them get through their first mistakes.

Specializes in ICU, CM, Geriatrics, Management.

Erica & Venous -- So sorry to hear some staff at your facilities are treating you as they are.

Experienced nurses should know better than to brow beat you folks. Everyone makes mistakes.

Hang in there and learn what not to do in the future to newer nurses.

I've had a few experiences like this myself! There are nurses like this at every facility. I don't know why they attack other nurses...maybe it makes them feel better about themselves, or somehow superior to other people. Don't stop asking questions! You are there for the patient, not for a snippy coworker.

Antibiotic ointment? Do you mean OTC triple antibiotic ointment? Because in that case the ointment also contains Neomycin and Polymixin B. Therefore, unless the order that she wrote "for a reason" states that the topical abx being used should contain all three of these, that nurse is wrong.

At my facility we write the order as TAO (Triple Antibiotic Ointment) if this is what was intended. You cannot write an order for bacitracin and then use TAO. That would be a med error...

Long story short, the other nurse is wrong, and you're right for ordering it.

Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis.

Don't beat yourself up not knowing that for your facility antibiotic ointment = bacitracin. None of us passed that mind reading class in school! At least you ordered it, you wouldn't believe how many experienced nurses I work with that take med orders and fail to order the med from pharmacy.

Shame on the nurses that gave you a hard time for a non-error like that. Remember that nobody is perfect, including them.

By the way, just showing your concern by writing that post definitely shows that you don"t suck as nurse!! LTC is overwhelming at times, even for us seasoned vets. You will get more comfortable and gain more confidence with time.

Specializes in critical care, ER,ICU, CVSURG, CCU.

i am sorry that is happening to you, and i am even more sorry it happens to a lot of newer nurses.......i wish nurses did not "eat their young"

i would of explained what ever the deviation may or may not have been, is done with what ever, and why etc...... i appreciate your efforts, can assure you it will get better........after 41yrs of being RN! i need you younger nurses, come on to the work place, as some of us fossils need some rest ))grins((

just try to let your princples guide your actions, every thing else will work out :angrybird5:

Well, after my first new admit at my first RN job (LTC and two month old grad), I cried on my next day off...because the other nurse working on the next hall was NO help at all. I feel like she purposely withheld info and wouldn't tell me diddely quat.....so I get it, it is be a witch to the newby who asks lots of questions..UGH!

I am a new grad and I just got my first job at a LTC. Most of the nurses have bad attitudes and don't want to train you. At Times I hate to even ask a question because of the attitude I get. It has gotten so bad I have second guess myself on whether nursing is the career for me. Everyday seems worse then the day before. So don't feel bad I'm going through the same thing. I'm praying things get better.

Lilmama and the others: let's make a pact to hang in there...we made it through school and we have something to offer...

Specializes in LTC, Float Pool, Ortho, Telemetry.
Well after my first new admit at my first RN job (LTC and two month old grad), I cried on my next day off...because the other nurse working on the next hall was NO help at all. I feel like she purposely withheld info and wouldn't tell me diddely quat.....so I get it, it is be a witch to the newby who asks lots of questions..UGH![/quote']

I appreciate new Nurses who ask questions because I feel that they care about learning how to take the best are of our residents/patients and becoming competent in their new role. On the other hand I worry about those who never ask questions and act as though they already know everything. IMO, there are no dumb questions.

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