I am convinced...

[Persephone Paige, ADN]

that if George Washington had possessed a nursing license, I would have felt no shame asking him to pass my narcs.

When I was interviewing for the job I currently hold, I was told it would be no big deal when it came to passing my narcotics. After all, it's only a year long process and I'm over three (3) months into it.

Well let me tell you, nothing could be further from the truth.

I have a few advocates, which I am so grateful for. But the chief person who was a part of my interviewing process has all but abandoned me. Yesterday, I had a patient begin asking to be medicated right at the beginning of my shift, during report actually. When I started this portion of my journey, I thought it best to have as few people know about my IPN participation as possible. And I tried it... Quickly though, I discovered that I was significantly shrinking the pool of potential narcotic passers.

Now, I'm asking the students, their teachers, the pharmacy techs ( they can't, btw ), etc.

Recently, the hospital pharmacist called because I was assigned a patient who was getting less and less of his scheduled IV pain med over a lengthening period of time. She spoke to me first, she would settle for speaking with my supervisor but really wished to speak with the doctor in charge of this patient. Lord knows what she thought: that I was charting "not given" while simultaneously shooting up at his bedside? Who knows? Anyway, I had to end up explaining to the MD that I was in IPN, couldn't always rely on people to pass my narcs the way I thought I would be able to (they way I was told I would be able to). He was very understanding, he took the call from the pharmacist and ultimately changed the order to PRN, but still.

I've reached the point of no return. No matter who they are, or what they may think, if I can get a narcotic passed, I ask 'em. They probably think I'm nuts, but oh well.

Three months down, nine to go.

[catsmeow1972, BSN, RN]

I was fortunate in that I worked off my key restriction in an area where I did’nt hand out narcs regularly. I still got thrown into positions where I had to disclose this to people who had no business knowing. A PACU nurse, when she needed a PCA double checked (call the house sup.), A co worker when the surgeon wanted some kind of cocktail for injection (sorry, just can’t. Why not? Just can’t. Do it yourself.) I also had a whack job of a charge/interim director/manager or what ever she was calling herself on any given day who Outed me to others. That was awesome. So much for right to privacy and dignity.

By the time I got to the floor, the key thing was gone but I still could not float. As one does not float in the OR (at least not non-voluntarily) to outside the department, I never worried about it. On the floor, I got cornered by a PCT (of all people) who challenged why I never floated when everyone else had to. Like it was any business of hers. I think she probably noticed that my name never showed up in the log of who floated last. I also think somebody didn’t have enough work to do.? My answer was the same...just can’t and not your business.

Having to constantly justify why you need help with this gets old. Fast. I suppose, being on this side, it’s easy for me (and any one else) to say “oh it doesn’t matter what ‘they’ think. Yeah, it does. As you close with, 3 down 9 to go. Just survive it. You’ve come this far. Ultimately you get your patient taken care of and that’s what being a good nurse is about....ergo, you are a good nurse...so there.

[Persephone Paige, ADN]

Thank you, Cats.