Husband rant...kinda long.

[jamieekins]

I start my ABSN program in January...it is coming so soon. I am so excited but super nervous. I like to prepare, I am very organized and enjoy some order in my life. My husband however, is the opposite. I have been trying to go down the list of to do's with him to prepare the family for the big changes and also to just have some sort of order in the household while I am gone. One of the items on the list was food/dinner prep. We DO NOT have any extra money this next year to eat out or grab dinner at all..we will be living on a very strict budget. That being said I am a stay at home mom now and have dinner planned every week ahead of time so that everyone gets dinner at 6:30. We have the schedule so tight in the evenings because my daughters have activities they do after school and then they come home and have homework to do and so dinner has to be cooked and ready by 6:30 or we eat soup. We are too busy not to have a schedule. My husband does not know about all the details and work that goes into this schedule...he just knows to go here and there and when to be where. I am the one behind the scenes orchestrating it all if you will.

Okay so here is my point...I tried to talk to him about meal prep and schedules once I start school. His answer? "I don't need to know the details...we will be fine. I will take care of it my way." OKAY...his way is they are late for everything and dinner (chick-fil-a or something quick) is not eaten until 8 at night and they don't get to bed until 10. NOT cool. My kids are going to before school care this next year and they will have to be up by 6am. They need sleep to function and we cannot afford to get quick dinners...not for a family of 6.

I love my husband dearly, we balance each other out. That being said, we have never switched roles before...he has never had my job. He thinks "his way" is going to get the job done and I don't doubt it will but I know that his way is the harder way and more stressful way- I have left him alone for a weekend here and there in the past to fly out and visit family and I have seen his way. I am only trying to offer him tips as to how I do things- I have been doing this for 8 years..I have worked out the kinks and I know what works and what does not. I only was trying to speak with him about dinner and maybe scheduling crock pot meals a few days a week and freezing meals for the rest and he did not want to hear it. Oi vey. I did not push the issue but I am feeling a bit panicked thinking about how things are going to go this next year for my family.

Maybe I am being a bit neurotic but I really just want this next year to be as low stress as it can be on everyone. So many people tell me to just let it go...I don't know why I can't. I have never had to hand over the reigns before completely so that is probably why. Should I bring this up with my husband again or just let it go?

[nguyency77, CNA]

When I was 8, my mom went back to work from being a stay-at-home mom. She worked long, hard hours. Thus, my brother and I were left at home with my dad. We ate Vienna sausages with Tabasco, Burger King, and Chicken McNuggets.

11 years later, my brother and I have learned to fend for ourselves. I learned how to cook a huge variety of things, and we have all learned to accept that the house can only get so clean. It drives my mother crazy, but whatever. If she wants the house sterile, she can do it herself. We no longer rely on my dad for food, because if we did... We would be obese/dead.

I promise you, from the children's perspective...It will get better (out of necessity). LOL Cheers! And best of luck on your academic journey!

[Stephalump]

My house is absolute chaos since I went back to school. My husband is a bit of a "free bird" while I'm anal enough for the both of us

Teamwork is definitely key. But I think the absolute most important thing to keep your time in NS lowish stress is expectations.

No matter how much coaching, planning, and talking y'all do, your husband is still going to be himself at the end of the day and the way he runs things will reflect that. Husband following mommy's rules will always be a totally different beast than mommy doing her own thing because it isn't organic.

My kids eat too much pizza. I filled up 7 garbage bags worth of laundry and went to a laundromat to get it all done at once the other day out of pure desperation. But we're doing it. In 16 months ill be finished and all the chaos will just be a memory.