Hospital charts

[madwife2002, BSN, RN]

Actual writings from Hospital charts:

1. The patient refused autopsy.

2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she

was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a

year.

6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it

disappeared.

7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears

to be depressed.

8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

9. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.

10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert

but forgetful.

11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

12. She is numb from her toes down.

13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

14. The skin was moist and dry.

15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her

life, until she got a divorce.

19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for

physical therapy.

20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.

24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

[pooh54]

These are great, keep 'em coming! :rotfl:

[letina]

Kay, you are so funny :rotfl:

There's one we see regularly in our pt's daily report :

"Offered pt a bowel to have a wash"

[zambezi, BSN, RN]

I have read this multiple times and everytime it makes me laugh out loud.

I totally understand how stuff like this gets written...

[madwife2002, BSN, RN]

Kay, you are so funny :rotfl:

There's one we see regularly in our pt's daily report :

"Offered pt a bowel to have a wash"

I like 21 best

[maolin]

Best one I've seen on one of my pts (in my extensive year of nrsg school :chuckle ) was "pt ate 100% of bowel of soup." A simple and understandable typo - but funny just the same.

[greenspreengs]

number 17 makes me wince every time i read it!! :rotfl:

actual writings from hospital charts:

1. the patient refused autopsy.

2. the patient has no previous history of suicides.

3. patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

4. she has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she

was very hot in bed last night.

5. patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a

year.

6. on the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it

disappeared.

7. the patient is tearful and crying constantly. she also appears

to be depressed.

8. the patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

9. discharge status: alive but without my permission.

10. healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert

but forgetful.

11. patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

12. she is numb from her toes down.

13. while in er, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

14. the skin was moist and dry.

15. occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

16. patient was alert and unresponsive.

17. rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

18. she stated that she had been constipated for most of her

life, until she got a divorce.

19. i saw your patient today, who is still under our car for

physical therapy.

20. both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

21. examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

22. the lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

23. skin: somewhat pale but present.

24. the pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

25. patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

[student4ever]

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Absolutely hilarious... I see these all the time at the hospital I work at. Most common error I see, and relatively funny, though sad at the same time.

Disposition: deceased, body to the morgue

Condition on discharge: improved, condition stable.