No disrespect by the title of this thread, but I must say I am rather frustrated with what is going on.
My dad has hx of alcoholism (and addictions of other nature as well). When he first got terminal lung ca the doctors told him how addiction is not a concern now, only pain control. Well, I believe he either never really fully understood the pain scale or he manipulated to get strong opiods to medicate anxiety (he has Xanax, but I think he prefers the completely out of it state of Oxy--until he became completely "gone".). Anyway, he is now sitting at 600 mg Oxycontin per day when you combine SR with IR. He is so out of it that he nods out in from of the fridge for 3 hours!!! It has gone from bad to worse! Every time hospice comes my dad says his pain is between a 6 and 8 on the pain scale but will tell us earlier that day that the PHYSICAL pain in his chest is only a 3 but his MENTAL pain is off the charts. We try to explain that Xanax is for mental pain, Oxycontin for physical pain, but no matter what, every time he has some anxiety (which is all the time) he reaches for that IR! Well, because of that every time they come they are upping his drugs. Last time, he couldn't even talk with the nurse for the assessment w/o his head falling and she wanted to DOUBLE the whole freaking dose! My dad will even say he doesn't like how his mind feels, how doped he is, but he doesn't speak up. I know he is just too afraid of what is too come.
It is frustrating cuz on one hand my Dad will say he thinks he is too doped up, that we are right he did not understand the pain scale, but then when the nurse comes he is like mums the word! Last time she visited we all were there (my siblings) and everyone ended up in this big fight :argue: , speaking for my Dad. Finally I spoke up (I could tell the nurse was frustrated) and said, "Excuse me, but shouldn't my father be able to speak for himself..I mean, is he still ABLE to speak for himself?" The nurse said, "Yes". So I said, "well, ask him then!" (regarding whether he wanted the medication doubled). We were so very concerned because now he has become incontinent of bowel and urine at night, and most recently, has developed tremors. The nurse also said that putting him inpatient for one week and getting him on Methadone was another option. WHAT?? Jeez, we don't want to do that....He had one month to live one month ago, the last thing we want to do is put him in a facility to "detox" from Oxycontin. Jeez.
I don't know if we are all fighting a losing battle anyway. His appetite is close to nothing (don't know if that is influenced by the Oxy). He has tremors now and they did decrease the Oxy because of that. He can't hold his bowels. And according to him, pre Oxy, the only pain he had was in his chest!! I don't know if it is just the drugs causing all these symptoms. He is taking something like 50 pills a day!!!! You know, senna, colace, xanax, mediclophan (nausea creme), Oxy SR and IR. He can't even remember what day it is and DEFINITLY can't figure out when he gets more pain meds. I don't even know how he even can remember he is in pain!!!
he was supposed to have only "weeks to months" according to the doc back on St Patty's Day. with his SCLC, the tumor near his heart is the big prob, but now he has a visible mass on his back near his kidney. We want my Dad to lead a pretty OK quality of life while his pain isn't so bad, but now, because of these drugs, he has lost almost all dignity. Am I wrong to assume this? Is this just the end, like it or not? I just wish these drugs were never started cuz now we will never know how he really would have felt! :crying2:
If you have any suggestions on how to deal with this situation, I would like them..anything that has not already been suggested.....
:crying2: