Home Care Heaven

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In Home Care Heaven:

*All houses are clean and have indoor plumbing

*Oasis is declared unnecessary

*All nurses are given Cadillac SUV's, loaded, with road service and unlimited gas charge accounts, optional chaffuer when you need that drive time to chart, eat or nap.

*All patients have family members willing to learn, help and are completely sane.

*All doctors are interested in hearing what the nurse feels the patient needs and often say, "I wish I'd thought of that" and "I couldn't do this without you!"

*Digital disimpactions are no longer needed, a sprinkle of pixie dust does the trick!

*The top executives of leading managed care organizations are all in desperate need of home care but ......only 2 visits are approved and they'll have to do the care for themselves!! HA!

:devil: :p :devil: ;)

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Specializes in MS Home Health.

Sounds just like home health. Yes the HMO stuff is a killer. Teach the world and more in 2 visits please. Then call and beg for more.

renerian:(

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Specializes in Home Health.

Love it!!

Love the pixie dust especially.

And, I know it says all houses are clean, but just to be specific, my Heaven has no roaches either. :)

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quote: (tehehehehe.. my favorite) All doctors are interested in hearing what the nurse feels the patient needs and often say, "I wish I'd thought of that" and "I couldn't do this without you!"

May I add to the list?

:)

Patients would never pull out their tubes, foleys, or lines during off hours.

Nurses would be compensated fully for all the extra Case Management.

ICD-9 really stood for Incredible Care and Dedication would include an extra 9 hours of PTO.

:rotfl: okay... okay... I am dreaming. :rotfl:

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