Help! I think nursing is not for me!!

[lmr14]

I graduated as a BScN 2014. I got my first job in LTC as casual nurse, shortly after I became a travel nurse consultant and I really liked it, I was getting a lot of hours so I left the LTC. Well as the business grew it became more about sales and ethically I could not sell what wasn't needed or recommended to clients. My hours decreased, because the nurses with the most sales would get the hours, so I got another job at LTC to casual at to compensate lost hours. I found myself getting bored in travel medicine because in my office I was the only person there, I felt isolated and felt I was losing nursing knowledge and skill and there were no pt/ft positions at the ltc. I decided to look for a job that was more challenging and would help gain some hands on experience. I received an offer for FT employment as a community nurse, which brings me to now.

This is a job that is meant for experienced nurses. I find myself drowning in stress, this jobs consumes my life, I am loosing sleep. I am being sent to homes with clients with care needs that I am not qualified to do. I have reached out to my supervisor and educator , but I was declined joint visits, education and being certified in certain skills, because I hadn't completed all my modules, some that were completely irrelevant to care (IE how to use a computer). I have now finished them and I am still finding I am being pushed to the side. There is no support unless your a favorite, or this is how it seems. I had a review and the resource nurse said I am too anxious. I told her I am not like that with my clients when shes not there observing.

My problem is that I don't like this job, but financially I need to work. I need skills. I am worried that when I start looking for a new job, I will be asked why in such a short time I have switched jobs so much, although I have been with the travel medicine clinic for 2 years, but during that time I have had 2 ltc casual jobs and this community job is ft and travel clinic is now casual.

I want a happy job, support and I want to love my job.

Any suggestions, because at this rate I am ready to leave nursing.

[ottersloveoysters]

What brought you to nursing initially? What interests you about nursing now? It sounds like this job isn't for you but I'm not sure that means nursing isn't for you.

[Cowboyardee]

What didn't you like about the LTC positions?

Honestly, you've kind of been jumping around in different jobs without ever really building a strong base of the nursing skills you might need to be independent and confident in those jobs and make your life easier. I've seen 'anxiety' defined as the fear that you don't have the resources to do what's being asked of you - and in this case, that definition might be true enough.

If you're not ready to throw away your education or move permanently into some off-branch of nursing where you will find yourself forever lacking the skills needed to make a change, I'd suggest giving another look at acute care. Med-surg jobs aren't necessarily fun, and they typically aren't stress-free. But they build skills, and having a reliable skill set is a huge part of feeling confident and enjoying your work for the rest of your career. Think of it as the two year internship nursing school should have in order to complete the degree. On the upside, it's a fully paid internship.

[lmr14]

I have always felt so gratified helping others. I think I would love to work in postpartum, maybe labor and delivery. I have zero experience except my nursing school 3 month placement and that was 5 years ago. I was thinking of starting some extra courses, but still not sure I would be a candidate with no pp or L&D experience.

[lmr14]

I think this may be were I went wrong, I took the first job offered because I wanted to work. I gained a lot of experience health teaching/educating clients and I can give a fantastic IM/SQ . You are right I need a good foundation to build off of. I am nervous now though, trying to explain in an interview why I have been a nurse for 2 years and I am basically like a new grad. Maybe I should stick it out in the community...or try to find a position in med/surg and have the support of fellow nurses.

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

Moved to our Canadian Nursing forum for more responses.

[madricka, BSN, RN]

Don't let this unpleasant and stressful job situation destroy your love of nursing! There are a lot of jobs (in any field) that suck. The beauty of nursing is that you can switch to different areas until you find one that clicks and makes you feel satisfied -- it's out there, you just have to find it. From what you've said it sounds like going to a general med-surg floor in a hospital would be ideal. You would have a nurse educator, access to in-services to learn/develop new skills, support from other nurses (& nurse manager), and a wide range of patient populations so you would be exposed to different types of needs/activities to strengthen your skill set. Even though you've been away for a while doing community, interviewing wouldn't be as hard as you think. If they ask why you suddenly want to be in hospital, just be honest! Community isn't for you and you want to develop your clinical skills, you're eager to learn as much as you can and so on. Emphasize that you are looking for a facility with a lot of educational opportunities and a lot of different types of patients. And, of course, emphasize your current strengths.

Once you get more experience in hospital you will feel a lot more confident about gravitating to a more specialized area (like L&D).

[FitNurse444]

I found home care very stressful as well and I like you had a few jobs in a short amount of time (mostly casual positions). I just recently landed an interview for a full time position in LTC. it was hard to come by and I was nervous to explain why I had so many jobs but I just explained that they were only casual positions and it is difficult to find permanent full time work. They obviously understood because I got the job! It sounds like LTC might be a good fit for you I find it less stressful and it doesn't consume my life like homecare and hospital nursing.