new job, bad anxiety

  1. This is mostly a vent, I am just so frustrated right now. I am starting nursing school this semester, next week actually, and got a job as a PCA in home care. My position is nights, 2x a week. Even though it's nights I only work for abot 3 hours at night and in the morning, getting my disabled patient read for bed and for the day in the morning. I also have to 1-2 times a night to turn him. I initially was really exited to get this position, I thought I'll get some good experience in nusing skills and be able to work while my kids are sleeping but still get a decent amount of sleep at night. This was my fourth day of work, first day that I was mostly doing it on my own, and it was absolutely horrible. I feel like some of the tasks are just physically too hard for me, like lifting and transferring. I feel like everything I do is not to my patient's satisfaction.

    But the absolute worst is the sleep deprivation. I have my own room there to sleep, but after waking up at night to turn him I just cannot get back to sleep. i'm nervous about everything I need to do in the morning, their house is too hot, their neighbors have stupid loud wind chimes, etc. The whole night is just torture, I keep feeling anxious that I can't sleep, which just makes me not go to sleep even more. I slept a total of about 3 hrs last night, and am a total mess. I feel too anxious to nap, but my brain just feels like mush. Today is my daughter's b-day but I'm having my husband take my kids to the ILs house this evening before work bc I'm afraid of snapping at them. After every time I work, I break out in hives the next day, which has never happened to me before.

    I just feel so defeated. I haven't even started nursing school and feel I won't be able to cut it, how the heck will I work night shifts if I can't even work a shift where I can mostly sleep.
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    About MadameFreckles

    Joined: Jun '09; Posts: 35; Likes: 10


  3. by   lhome
    Venting is good. I totally get it. I hope you can find something that fits for you better. There are jobs with more human contact and support. Try a nursing home.
  4. by   M/B-RN
    Since you have figured out that you can't sleep there, then prepare for it like it were a true night shift where you wouldn't be able to sleep. Sleep before going in, pack lunch, and since there is downtime bring stuff to do. I work nights and it's hard to get used to, but take care of your body and you will get used to it!
  5. by   Esme12
    ((HUGS)) I hope you feel better. invest in a large tote bag....put things that help you relax in it. Does the room you sleep have a window? open it slightly. Buy a table top fan....plug it in and run itce. It will cool you and provide white noise.......point it right at your face. Don't try to sleep..... try to rest. Close your eyes and dream. Let your mind wander.

    Get a laptop...... use it. Once in school you might find this time of essentially undisturbed quiet helpful to get work done so when you are home you will have quality time with your family homework free. I will not lie to you...nights are hard. In the hospital there is no quiet down never get used to them but you do learn to tolerate them.

    You will have to get protective of your home sleep time. You will learn to power nap. Your anxiety is exhausting you not the nights. The harder you try to slet the harder it will evade you. Don't try....just relax. Invest in good ear DVD/s on a cheap laptop. Focus on relaxing...not sleeping.

    I wish you the best.
  6. by   MadameFreckles
    I worked the next night and got even less sleep than the first I was able to sleep the last night that I was home, but today I still feel terrible. I feel terrible anxious, shivering, very naseous.

    The first time I worked 3 nights in a row, I was able to get a decent amount of sleep, maybe 4-5 hours a night. I napped a bit during the day, and after my night back at home was feeling fine, just a little tired. I am training every other weekend, so it had been two weeks since that time. I dunno if my body has just decided it will not cooperate, but if this keeps going on I will have to quit and look for another job. I don't have time to nap during the day as I am a SAHM with young kids, and my husband and I trade off evenings going to school. The girl that trained didn't seem to have this problem. On the weekends my patient likes to sleep in and she says she loves working those bc she gets so much sleep. I, on the other hand felt like it was torture to be confined to a room for 10 hours, unable to sleep.

    I wake up at home at night to tend to my kids all the time, but somehow am able to get to sleep just fine most of the time. Last night my daughter was sick and I got 3 times but it just didn't effect the same way, I ws able to go back to sleep. I think over there it's just that I have to physically exert myself to turn him and use my brain to get everything done and afterwards I am just unable to unwind and get to sleep.Does anyone have any ideas for getting back to sleep at night after waking up?

    I start NS classes this week and am a nervous wreck. I loved my prerequisite class and do very well in school but am starting to question whether nursing is for me bc I just don't know if I could ever do night shifts. Do you think it would ever be possible for me, as a new grad to start on day shift? I don't care where it is, I'm willing to give working in a chosen specialty for a regular schedule.
  7. by   DedHedRN
    Maybe this person you are caring for should be a two person assist with turnings and lifting? There is a possibility that this job may actually be dangerous for your health and back if your straining yourself so badly. Another thing is good body mechanics, and draw sheets, gait belts, you need to use all these things properly so that you reduce the wear and tear on YOUR body.

    Did you check for bedbugs? I have been reading that they are epidemic nowadays and would cause hives after sleeping in a bed that has them. Also, you may just be allergic to something at their house. There are some houses as a home visit nurse that I just would never sleep in.... As soon as I walk in I'm nauseous...I always attribute that to my weird and erratic allergies. Never could figure out exactly what it is that makes me feel icky... but its a fact that it does happen. I'm the person you always see at the store who opens every bottle of shampoo in the isle and smells it... because many smells make me sick and I wont buy any that do.

    You really need to learn to relax. Seriously. Its the key to nursing. Keeping a cool mind and not panicking..learning to let things go, and avoid stress. I had to practice meditation for months, but it really helped.

    I have a job where I work from home taking telephone calls all night long, and do home visits in the middle of the night frequently. I just make sure that all the little things that I like are available to me on my work nights.. my comfy pillow, my heater pad for my feet, and my PJ's. I keep my work clothes ready, my pen and paper and phone by my pillow so I don't stress about missing calls. I relax by playing a game on my cell for a few mins, then when my feet are warm I nod right out.. until the next call. I can usually work and get enough sleep to feel fine the next day.

    You can start out on days as a new nurse, usually PM shift, and they almost always want you to work weekends. Well, anyways.. I feel for you, I hope you enjoy nursing school, and can figure out your job situation. Good Luck!