feeling unsure... need input

[delirium]

Alright. Let me preface this by saying that I have worked *extremely* hard to get where I am right now with no help... I work full time, attend school full time, I am winding down the semester with one left to go and then graduation...

What's the problem?

I have no desire to be a nurse anymore.

Everything that I've seen in nursing school reinforces that nurses are underpaid and not respected. In fact, the nurses I've seen mostly act like waitresses to the doctors, scurrying around to get them things and cleaning up after them as if they've suddenly developed polio and cannot move their arms or legs.

Isn't there more to being a nurse than passing meds and answering call bells? Is that all it is? I haven't seen any sort of creative problem solving, critical thinking, haven't seen anyone have any FUN...

So yeah, I've worked hard to get here. It would be stupid not to finish. But what's the point of finishing to have a career that I will be miserable in, like all the nurses I have worked with thus far?

The only reason why I didn't walk off the floor at clinical last night and go home was that I had a friend ride with me, and I was her only way home.

Nursing school makes me feel like binge drinking.

Has anyone else ever gone through this?

[researchrabbit]

I agree with Heather -- nursing is what you make it. I don't think I COULD be a floor nurse for very long in most units (although there are a few that I'd like). Research suits me and I'll work in that area as long as I can...I get to use my problem-solving skills and I am autonomous.

I did psych research for 12 years and have just recently switched to a government grant in which our entire facility does investigator-initiated studies (we are also encouraged to write our own, although part of our mandate is that we must also have an MD sign on as a co-investigator). Now I am doing everything from elder fall studies to breast cancer to small vein elasticity and much more (lots to learn, I love it).

[JillR]

Delirium,

I used to feel like this after every sememster. I questioned my motives, and frequently questioned if going to nursing school was the right thing for me.

One time I was on break with some of the RN's that I worked with (I was a CNA and EMT) and they were talking trash about the EMT's that I worked with. Later that day the ER/EMS director called me at home and I was very upset and told her why. She said to me "Now you know the kind of nurse you do not want to be, you have the choice not to become like that. Quitting nursing school is one option, but another option is making the decision to behave in the way that you would like others to. I hope you make the right choice." She never once told me what she thought I should do, just that I had choices regarding my behavior. Now, when I work with people with bad attitudes, I just stay away from them. If they want to kiss up to the docs and wait on them, that is their choice. I choose not to act like a maid because I am not a maid and I believe that when nurses act like that, it creates an expectation. I believe that you will get as much respect and you expect to get and earn. You cannot wait on doctors and expect them to respect you for that. Same goes for your kids, would you let your children treat you this way? ( I am not talking about small children, I am talking about older children) If no, then why in the world would you let a mere aquantence treat you like that.

I refuse to even respond to treatment that is not acceptable to me.

I believe that all the nurses that you are observing as a student are role models. It's up to the individual student to discriminate what roles are acceptable and what are not. Use the positive and discard the negative. Just remember that not everything you will see in clinicals will be kosher. Not every nurse will do things the way that you have been taught to believe is the right way. This is where the good instructors come in to play. If you have decent instructors, you may be able to bring up these concerns and they may be able to help you to sort through your feelings and thoughts. I was lucky, we had great instructors that did not forget what it was like to be a student.

Good luck in your decision. I hope you make the best decision for you.

Jill

[micro, RN]

Yes, actually I went into nursing school after high school........but I had other things to do..............

then I returned to nursing school in "my second lifetime".........

......micro.............

[jessjoy]

You are definetly NOT alone! I was JUST talking to one of my classmates about this the other day. We seem to go through phases of enthusiasm and phases of self-doubt. Every week I flip flop back and forth wondering if I am doing the right thing. But one thing keeps me going.......there are TONS of different ways to be a nurse. If I (or you) can't stand the hospital setting we don't have to be there!! There are so many ways to be a nurse. It doesn't have to always be in a hospital. More than anything I am just trying to find my "nursing niche" I graduate in May and I have no idea where I want to work!! I just wanted you to know that you are not alone....and I feel better knowing that I am not alone!! Good luck!!

[missionnurse]

Delirious!

I have been feeling the same way as of late. I have one semester left till I graduate! I just recently found the answer I needed.

As part of our clinicals, we have to go to a school, a doctors office and the health department. For me this was the best experience yet. I was able to see how nursing is used in a situation outside of the hospital. To me the hospital is full of catty backbiting women, but at the health department I found the place for me!

Take a look at what else is out there! There are SSSSOOOOO many more places for a nurse to use her skills. Perhaps finding one of these areas will give you back the inspiration you started with!

Good Luck and Keep up the Work!!

Misty