failed clincials...done for the semester (long post)

  1. I posted previously that I had been placed on a clinical action plan on April 17th with only 3 clincial days left in the semester and today I was told that I still wasn't functioning on the level of a second semester student and I wouldn't be moving forward in program.
    Yesterday, my guest CI rated my performance as "fair" but not satisfactory and said that I was unorganized and reprimanded me for not being able to start an IVPB on my own. I told the guest CI that I hadn't done one on my own before and she actually grabbed my skills checklist and searched to see whether or not I'd been checked on it (I had done one with another CI) then she said, "You've done this once with my CI and you gave me the impression that you had never done one. I would've thought you hadn't done it at all." I told her that I hadn't done one alone and that I was sorry if she got the wrong impression, so I guess she thought I wa a liar. I got my patient assignment and told myself that I would do everything right today but everything went downhill quickly.
    This morning when I got in, I checked my pts info and listened to report. I looked up my pts meds and she was receiving Humulin 70/30 @ 0730. I did an Accuchek. I talked to my CI about the pt's insulin order, sliding scale insulin, the pts BS level and I was told that we wouldn't be giving sliding scale insulin because of her results, so I thought I was prepared. I gathered up all my meds and we were standing outside of the pt's room when my CI says, "You're forgetting something. Something the pt asked me about early this morning when I went in." I said, "Okay, let me think this through." I couldn't think of anything and the pt hadn't talked to me about anything when I'd gone in so, I clicked through the MAR and looked at everything, so I'm standing there looking confused because I thought I had gotten all of the meds. I finally said, "I don't know what I forgot." Then my CI says, "You forgot the pt's insulin." I said, "I thought we aren't giving the insulin." My CI says, "We aren't giving the regular insulin, we are giving the combo insulin. I explained to her that I had gotten confused because I had asked her about the insulin earlier and I had the vial in my hand and had put it back because I thought we weren't giving it. My CI goes on to say, "You should know the difference between the pts sliding scale orders and her insulin order and if I wouldn't have been standing here, you wouldn't have given the insulin and that is unsafe." So that was strike one.
    Strike two, was when I was trying to set up a new IVPB. I had went over the steps at least 50 times in my mind and I just knew I was ready. Well, when we got in the pt's room and I started going through the process, I had to change the line so I unhooked the old one and got ready to spike the new one and my instructor says, "You're forgetting something and you're going to lose all of that medicine." So, I'm standing there holding the bag and the line and running through my steps and then I figure dout that I hadn't clamped down the roller. So I clamped the roller shut and primed the tubing and hung the IVPB and stood for a couple of secs to watch the drip start. My CI says, "Is it dripping?" It wasn't dripping, so I opened the roller clamp. It still wasn't dripping. I'd opened the roller clamp for the primary set instead of the secondary set. So I realized the mistake and opened the roller clamp for the secondary but it was too late because I'd already messed up the procedure. My CI said, "Did you not do this yesterday, you should know how to do this by now."
    Anyway, I don't want to go into all the excruiating details but I guess it all boils down to some stupid mistakes that have cost me this semester. I'm very sad about it but I am trying to be strong. I have to meet with her before class tommorrow and she's already told me her evaluation. She says because of the insulin I am unsafe and I don't know what I should know and maybe I should rethink my career because while I am a caring person, I'm not on the level of a second semester student.
    At this point, I'm depressed and I don't know what to do. I want to reapply for the next sememster and restart all over but I don't know if I will be allowed to since I didn't pass clincials. I'm just really sad. I've worked so hard and spent so much money and I am really disappointed with myself.
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    About shining_star28463

    Joined: Aug '06; Posts: 35; Likes: 4

    23 Comments

  3. by   SuesquatchRN
    {{{{shiningstar}}}}
  4. by   Clarise
    I am sorry. Your CI sounds like a nightmare. You are still a student and you don't know everything and won't be "perfect" as a second semester student. Seems like she is being extremely difficult and trying to get rid of you. Because let me tell you I am sure there are other students in your clinical group who make similar mistakes and are not failed. Unfortunately she had you in her mind since the beginning and was unwilling to give you a break.
  5. by   shining_star28463
    Quote from Clarise
    I am sorry. Your CI sounds like a nightmare. You are still a student and you don't know everything and won't be "perfect" as a second semester student. Seems like she is being extremely difficult and trying to get rid of you. Because let me tell you I am sure there are other students in your clinical group who make similar mistakes and are not failed. Unfortunately she had you in her mind since the beginning and was unwilling to give you a break.
    I beleive there is favoritism too. I'm constantly being compared to other students but these are the same students that listen to lung sounds through clothing and show up to clincal site without stethoscopes. One day I left my penlight in the car and I got a "U".
  6. by   Soup Turtle
    I'm sad for you...

    I think you should give it another shot next semester, but get a different clinical instructor. Even if I knew everything, I'd forget it under the stress that she seems to have inflicted on you.
  7. by   _Shar_
    I hate CI's like that!! Ive had one too but thank god it was my first year, first semester clinical or I believe I would have failed. People like that make me want to quit!

    I think you should take this matter further, can you talk to someone? Take the proper action and say you have been treat unfairly and deserve a second chance or something. I know at my uni is possible to fill out a form and they look into it.

    Good luck.
  8. by   jazzyran
    I Kind Of Agree With Clarice About Your Ci. Keep Your Head Up!!!!!! Reapply, Dont Give Up!!!!
  9. by   NursinOrBust
    You are still a student and being put on the spot like that is sooooo frustrating. Sounds like you handled it well. Talk to an advisor at school, seek out your options, and don't give up. Days like these can only make us stronger. :icon_hug:

    BL
  10. by   muffie
    meanie ci

    you guys are first year !!!!!!

    hang in star
  11. by   CaliNicuRN
    If this is your passion and your goal, DO NOT GIVE UP. I had many tough trials during school and nearly didn't make it through 4th semester clinicals. Fortunately I pulled myself together. My point is reapply. Get back in there and do it! You can do it. I know how tough it is to have an instructor over your shoulder all the time especially when they are pushing you to fail.

    Hold your head up high and reapply. Don't let one person take away your goals from you.

    Tracy
  12. by   canoehead
    Sometimes the fact that you know you are on the line makes it harder to remember everything. If you really want this, don't give up.
  13. by   Psqrd
    Good luck star and don't give up, that just lets your CI win.
    Now you know not to trust her for anything...when she says that you don't have to give insulin, then you know to double check. This is something that I have been told you must carry into practice after you graduate when its your license on the line and no CI to look over your shoulder.
    Oh and by the way caring is huge in health care, when sometimes it may appear that money is all that matters.
  14. by   jjjoy
    There is a bright side to this. Instead of thinking of it as "failing" and "retaking" a course, think of it as "extra practice" and "really nailing it down." Most new grad nurses feel that they could've used more clinical time in school, so here's a chance. Hopefully, you'll get a different CI. If you're going to have the same CI, try to find a mentor - maybe someone from this site! - to review each clinical day with and get a different perspective.

    If you can, arrange a meeting with the CI soon and ask her in all seriousness what she thinks you need to work on most and what you can do to make the most of this upcoming 'second chance.' You'll probably feel defensive and unfairly judged but listen respectfully, thank her graciously, see if there's anything useful she noted and then mentally toss out those things that don't help. If you find you have some questions later, consider another short meeting with her. She will certainly see that you are REALLY dedicated to improving. Of course, this strategy depends on the CI. If you know it's a bad idea, don't do it.

    Does your school have an open skills lab time? If not, is there another school that might? There's a community college 40 minutes from where I live that has open hours in their skills lab and any health professional can access it if they pay a small enrollment fee. It's a great place to practice skills over and over again, by oneself and then with the on-duty instructor to review your technique. No grades!

    Also, ask your classmates if they'd like to practice skills with you. You can take turns critiquing each other and get more comfortable with being observed and thinking on your feet. Ask them to "not be too nice" sometimes.

    Next term, you'll also have new clinical classmates. You can learn a lot from them, too!

    This really can be an wonderful learning opportunity! I truly do not believe that "failure" is a waste. There's always some new opportunity, even if it's "just" learning patience and humility. : )

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