Mom needs advice please!!!

Nurses General Nursing

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Hello,

Any advice would be helpful. My daughter is 17 years old and was homeschooled. She went ahead and took her GED and did well. She has wanted to be a nurse for many many years. She was unable at this age to enter an RN program and to be honest as her parent did I feel she was ready. We instead allowed her to enter a LPN program. There were 3 in our area to choose from. We decided to choose the smaller program feeling she would be better off. I wish I had done my homework on the programs but I had no idea each had its own rules. My husband and I are paying cash for her program. This has been hard but we do whatever it takes to help our children. The first payment was 2500.00 dollars. We have another payment due in December and the last one in June. I felt the need to explain all of this before I explained the problem. Our daughter Laura performs well on fill in the blank tests but struggles with Multiple Choice. She said something happens to her and she just goes blank. She knows the material believe me. She has pulled all A's on the fill in the blank but pulled low 70's on the Multiple Choice. Passing is 75. What we found out after we had enrolled and paid was that this particular program will expel you after the fail of the 6th exam. It does not matter if you got all A's in the unit these are not averaged in its only the final exam that counts and these are multiple choice. I found out after the fact that another program in the area does not kick you out but works with you. They also average ALL your grades in the unit so even if you score below on a final your quizzes and tests can pull your average right back up. My daughter asked for help in her present school and was told to buy a book. I am so discouraged for her. She would be a wonderful nurse. My husband and I will be out the 2500.00 if we take her out of the program but the next payment is due in December. She could get to a month before graduation and fail the final and be gone. We don't know what to do??? She has been in school for 6 weeks and right now carries and average of 86. But the MC tests pull her down. She has failed one exam with a 73(only missed it by 2 pts) and so she has one strike. If she fails 5 more she is gone. What do you suggest?

Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr.

I would want my daughter to be a nurse. She said she would be kicked, hit and spit on and most nurses end up in agony by the age of 50. I do know a few nurses and never had I heard such negative stuff. Is it really that awful for a nurse?

I don't want to give this posters identity but she told me this and it scared me:

". I don't know why you would encourage your daughter to go into nursing. She will risk being kicked, spit on, cussed at, treated like a flunkee, and generally abused."

She will be exposed to many diseases and antibiotic-resistant bacteria, hepatitis, TB, HIV and the verbal abuse is VERY real.

THIS SCARED ME!!!

I understand your fears, but you are not the one who has to live your daughter's life. It is not your choice even though you are the Mom and paying the bills. If she chooses not to go into nursing because of your fears, she will still be drawn to a career helping people, and thus she will still be at risk for the above.

The fact is people who work in careers that deal directly with the public are at risk of bodily injury. Social Workers, Cops, Firefighters, EMTs, volunteers, or even a Medical Assistant taking patients back for his/her check up are at risk.

I doubt your daughter will be convinced to choose a different career path for too long assuming you are able to change her mind right now. Trust me when I say that the change of mind will only be temporary. At 17 she may placate to your wishes because she is afraid to do otherwise (you hold the purse strings and she was home schooled and possibly sheltered). However, sooner or later you and your husband will not have that kind of control over her life or her choices and she will be back here.

Read the posts on this board of people who changed his/her minds at an early age because of parents and now are trying to get nursing degrees. I know, I am one of them.

I went into IT because my parents were not thrilled with the idea of me becoming a nurse for similar reasons (my Mom worked in health care for years and knew the risks). I was miserable, though I was good at my job! I always had a nagging feeling I was doing NOTHING with my life.

People told me that I "saved" their lives when I was able to do my job and recover material or fix a computer problem or write a program that saved time. However, I did not come close to actually saving lives until I worked as a Social Worker. So now I am back studying to become a Registered Nurse.

You say you know you have to give her more control. Well, this is the time to actually do it. Let her live her life and she will actually come to you for advice. If you continue to shove advice down her throat and try to fix her problems, she will eventually start to ignore you because she will realize you are hindering her growth and harming her future.

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Specializes in Float.

I think the advice to take a few gen ed classes is a great idea. Get her feet wet for college type learning. She would probably enjoy those a lot more than jumping straight into nursing classes.

In my nursing program (RN) we had an entire lecture dedicated to studying and test taking! These styles of tests are something so unique to nursing programs that it is very important to learn HOW to take the tests. I have found several books in the nursing section at our college library about test taking. They help you identify what TYPE of test taker you are (for instance personally I WAY over think questions) and give you tips of figuring out the distractors. I also like the idea of covering the potential answers and thinking about it BEFORE you get distracted by those distractors lol.

I don't know a lot about LPN school.. but in RN school we are expected to take initiative in our learning process and there is much self study involved. This may be why the books were recommended... that is why they are written..because that is a whole learning component unto itself..learning the way the tests work.

Mommy

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Specializes in Emergency.
We can not afford tutors. And she has asked for help and they told her to buy a book. I do have a book ordered for her. It just baffels me as to how schools can vary so much. The school that she is in now bases all their weight on finals and I found out has about 50 % grad rate but the other school takes all tests into consideration and has a 99 % grad rate. I wish I had dug deeper. I know she has to take a State Exam but there are plenty of online prep courses and books for that and she can retake it. I had just heard that it took a women 5 times to pass. Why do programs vary so much?

It's not the graduation rate from the school that you need to worry about, it's the pass rate for the LVN boards. We started with 60 students in my ADN program and had 12 graduate at the end of two years. But all twelve passed boards.

The problem with nursing school and the standardized tests and the NCLEX (board exam) is that none of them reward critical thinking skills. They want rote memorization of facts and the ability to regurgitate them. The problem with home schooled kids that I have seen is that they are usually better educated than their peers and DO have increased critical thinking skills.

So, now what to do for your daughter. Since she is getting good grades on non-MC tests, it's obvious that she knows the material. The various MC books that were recommended (also called Q&A practice books) are a good idea. This will give her practice with that specific testing format. How about when she takes a MC test, she cover everything but one question at a time with her hand or a piece of blank paper. Then answer that question in her mind as if it is a fill in the blank. Then uncover the answers for that question and choose the answer that best fits what she has already decided on as the answer.

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Specializes in Pediatrics.

I'm glad to hear your daughter is beginning to get the hang of things. It sounds like she is very smart and will do well in the long run.

I am sorry you received such a horrible e-mail. Most likely someone sent it privately because they new if they posted it, there would be a huge outlash from those of us who actually LIKE nursing. Nursing has its strengths and weaknesses (just like every other type if job). But I think the GREAT thing about nursing is that there is so much diversity in job opportunities. Any nurse is bound to find something that fits well with him/her. But it can take time, and it WILL be frustrating waiting for the Best Fit For Me Job! For me it was peds and by unexpected life events, I landed into teaching future nurses. Which was not something I ever really considered, but is by far my favorite job.

I also hope you encourage your daughter to become a member of the forum. It is a great support system for nurses and future nurses!

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Specializes in Telemetry, post partum, critical care.

the minimum credential to teach in the california state university system is a doctorate in nursing. the minimum credential to teach for university of phoenix is a masters degree. the minimum credential to teach for a community college is a bachelor's degree in nursing and preferably a masters. there are some vocational colleges that will accept someone with an rn license. however, in my opinion the lpn is not worth it. it is not a stepping stone to anything except an rn license. employment is limited to those facilities that utilize them. they can find work in clinics or doctor's offices but generally that does not pay very well. registry lpn's make half of what an rn makes while doing very similar duties. so your advice does not really apply in this case. the student will have limited options as an lpn. good for you that you found a great job. however, it is not in floor nursing and you are not an lpn.

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Specializes in Pediatrics.

In the area I live in, we have some LPN schools and some of the clinicals are taught by LPN's. The class portion is taught by BSN's. Also, MA schools utilize LPN's as well. I'm only saying this to note that teaching certainly isn't out of the question. Also, the mother had stated in an earlier post that her daughter strongly intended to advance her degree, but wanted to be able to get some nursing experience. Perhaps I should have been more clear about that in my post. Sorry for any confusion!

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As far as books go are funds are a little low but I have a bid on e-bay of what I was told was a great book. Its called Saunders Comprehensive Reviews for NCLEX-PN. It comes with a CD also. Anyone heard of it? Thank-You for all your help. I have much to learn about letting go. Thank-you for all your kind responses and your honestly. I needed to hear it!

I am in my 2nd year of LPN school, and we just recieved this book...it is wonderful. I was having some difficulty with the style of the questioning on my tests....I feel more confident now, and I know what to look for because of practicing on the CD that comes with it. It is a great study guide, Im sure that she will find it very useful. :nurse:

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