I need help and Im between a rock and a hard place - page 4

An icident happened a few months ago , and I need advise on what to do, and how much further I should carry this issue... I was in the Operating Room when a Dr that I was working the case for ,... Read More

  1. by   HRHNurse Carol
    Zoe, you are the good guy here...and you are doing the right thing. I once chaired a violence in the workplace committee and boy did I learn a lot. Too many of us as nurses take things that are done to us as part of our job, or our fault, or don't want to make waves. Congratulations Zoe on breaking that pattern- what you are doing will help all nurses not just you. That man- I can't call him a doctor- should have been arrested. The hospital should have backed you and gotten you the support you needed, whether medical, emotional or whatever you needed. I once saw a supervisor have a dr. arrested because he took a phone out of her hand physically. It basically was a misdemenor (spellin!?) here but he was very embarrassed and he had to go to court and he had to apologize on public record. A lot of problems with other Dr's stopped at that time. As a manager now I will never ever let that sort of thing occur on my shift. I will call the police myself. Still working on way to stop some of the more insideous abuse tho... I am thankful for all the good doctors out there who are sane, competent and secure enough about themselves to treat others in a respectable manner. Of course, part of stopping the abuse is reconizing how we abuse ourselves and other nurses. I think we are making progress and especially those of us who use this forum seem more empowered- I think this forum helps! And Zoe, what you are doing is a good thing and it's good for all of us. Thankyou Zoe.
    Well spoke with the lawyers this morning....
    Its fixin to get ugly , and thats ok. I have come to a decison that ugly is what it was in the first place and Im not backing down. Its also going federal for sure that was confirmed this morning in the meeting, I declined the Drs first offer and didnt look back , He called me a Money grubbin Bi#$^ which is fine , my lawyer just smiled at him and told his lawyer that would be another charge as well. I maynot be able to get him so hard because of the state Im in but I want and have requested that if the case is settled or even if it goes to court I retain the rights for publication. That I will not back down on, I think the support here has been wonderful and I cant thank each and everyone of you enough ....
    As far as the Nurses that look down on me because of this , Well thats ok, maybe one day they wont have to chance to know how it feels and thats all that matters to me.
  3. by   lpn2serve
    Dear Zoe, I am new into this field. I am still in school and when I hear stories like this, it makes me a little upset and somewhat uneasy about the profession that I have chosen, especially with the fact that I will be an LPN. During clinical rotations, I have seen this kind of abuse come from physicians and I think that is horrible that two professionals can't collaborate with each other in a "professional" manner. I agree with you taking up for yourself and I commend your bravery and knowledge (knowing that you are right about your feelings and standing your ground). There is a thing that some nurses are doing now to take a stand against this kind of abuse in some hospitals that I have heard about. The nurses came together and come up with a code to call if there is abuse going on. They call it Code White Coat. When the code is called to that floor, other nurses come and stand as witnesses to the incident that is happening. I hope that everything works out for the best for you. Good luck.:roll
  4. by   ShelleyERgirl

    Zoe, we are all with ya girl, you don't have to take anybody's crap. You are a strong, courageous person or you wouldn't have taken any action at all. Keep ya head up sister and go on with your bad self!
  5. by   CaliNurse

    I really feel for you! Please think of the positive aspects of this situation - your knowledge! We know the golden rule, "If its not documented its not done"! ASAP make a log book of everything that happened. who said what to who. Try to keep all the emotions out of it and just state the facts. Document everything! Statement & Actions of - the Brainless surgeon,witnesses in the room did, Administration personnel, the Medical Staff, the Nursing Staff & anyone else who is relavent. Each time you interact with them and it relates to this DOCUMENT IT. Just save this as a journal. In case you eventually end up in court this can be used to show the suffering you have been going thru. It can also refresh you memories of who, what, why, when, and how. My husband was in a court case against a man who hit him while he was on a motorcycle. This was the advice of the attorney. It helped settle the case so it never went to court.

    Advice #2, You use statements like "I feel like a traitor". You may have a backbone which has helped you so far but it needs reinforcement. You should not feel like you did anything wrong. You may have been the first one bold enough to recognize his abusive behavior. I hope you can find a few things to help you. You need an Assertiveness class, MAB = Managing Aggressive Behaviors, and a few self help books about self enpowerment.

    If I were you I would file a complaint with the Medical Board, the Hospital, & the Department of Health.

    One last suggestion - instead of feeling like you "Are a traitor" start feeling like you "Are being treated like a traitor." Take the blame and self guilt out of it. It helps you handle the situation. You simply handled it appropriately, THEY CHOOSE THE HANDLE IT LIKE YOU WERE NOT!

    Let just one of those administrators do one case in the O.R. with him and he would be seen for face value!

    May I ask what state this happened in?

    This was also an abusive situation for your patient. How awful for them to think you are about to go under the knife and your surgeon is wigging out with his "Surgical Team". I would have at that point being the patient to get me the heck off the table that I wasn't going to fund his temper tantrum with his nurse.

    This is how some people (doctors in this case) conpensate for their low self esteem. They a perception of power by attempting to mistreat others and dominate them with ignorance.

    I hope you feel better soon, we support you!

  6. by   CaliNurse

    I forgot to say something - I am proud of you also!

    You are doing a great service to the profession of nursing.

    We often feel like we stand alone but in the long run if make a difference you are making a difference for all of us.

    I would also as one suggested take it anonymously inform the media. Did you hear about the doctor in Mexico who amputated a mans penis in error? This kind of thing travels fast. The hospital will not welcome such publicity. Although they can't reverse their actions now it will affect the future situations there. I would even leak it to radio stations. Everyone loves to be the first to report such things!

    Hang in there!

    We are part of your support system.

  7. by   Sodie
    I would do the same that you are doing. We had a Dr. that talked down to the staff. He would snatch things out of our hands. He wouldn't yell at us, but would talk to us in a very demeaning way, like we were children and had no clue as to what we were doing. He would do it in front of the patient, family members, other staff members and other doctors. Guess what? we told on him. We told the director over our department. One by one we went into the director's office and told what he had done to us individually. He had even called some people idiots. We also told his partners how he was treating the staff. His partners came down on him. They told him that he needed to behave better and to learn to treat the staff as he would like to be treated. The director did call him to his office and spoke with him. Now, he is more plesant and he actually says please and thank you. In other words, he mellowed out- Alot !! If we had not taken steps to talk with the director or his psrtners, he would still be acting like a jerk and we would still hate to be around him. It took alot of nerve to report him, because we all knew that he would know we did it. It is unfortunate that so many other people that your Dr. has abused has not taken up the fight that you have. This is probably the reason why nurses continue to be abused. When they get tired of the abuse, they give up and leave the profession. I am fortunate that my administration backed my department up. I am also fortunate that the other Docs in this group did not approve of his behavior. I have learned to say- I don't allow my children or my husband to talk to me that way and I'm not going to come to work and allow you to talk to me like that !! Best Wishes !! Hang in there !!