Funny experiences in nursing?

Well, there was the elderly gentleman whose room was across from the nurses' station. One day, during visiting hours, he threw his (stainless steel) bedpan out into the hall and shrieked "I cannot sh*t on this g-d plate!"

We had a patient one night go into the urology residents' room stark naked, take one of the doctor's white coats (which happened to have the doctor's name on it), put it on and proceed to go from room to room looking for his shoes. The alert patients who had that doctor wouldn't let him live it down. The nurses didn't either.

Another time I was holding a patient over on his side while another nurse was cleaning him before we transported him to the ICU. He was assisting by holding tight top one of my hands. The LPN came in to do a fingerstick. Because of his strong grip, I didn't feel anything until she poked my thumb with the lancet. The LPN didn't miss a beat. She simply stated, "we might as well make sure yours is okay since you haven't been to lunch yet.":rolleyes:

another time i was holding a patient over on his side while another nurse was cleaning him before we transported him to the icu. he was assisting by holding tight top one of my hands. the lpn came in to do a fingerstick. because of his strong grip, i didn't feel anything until she poked my thumb with the lancet. the lpn didn't miss a beat. she simply stated, "we might as well make sure yours is okay since you haven't been to lunch yet.":rolleyes:

years ago when the climate about restraints was far different than it is today, we used to give paraldehyde to our patients likely to dt. it was nasty stuff and no one wanted to drink it -- we used to chase them around the unit to try to make them drink it. but that's another story!

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]we had one old guy go into active dts -- screaming about the bugs all over his skin, trying to leave, etc. etc. the solution to that in those days was that every nurse on the floor holds the patient down while the resident gives him a shot of librium. there were only two nurses on the floor -- not enough to hold the guy down for the resident to give him a shot, so we paged the nursing supervisor for help. she showed up with a friend from the maternity ward (who had never seen such an event before).

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]the four of us nurses tackled the guy as he was about to pry the windows open to leave (from the 10th floor), and the resident had the librium syringe -- and plunged the whole dose into the arm of the lpn i was working with that night! never missing a beat, bill shouted "draw up another dose before i pass out!"

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]the patient got his librium and was restrained and sedated for the rest of the night. bill slept off his dose in the break room, and the supervisor spent most of the night helping me keep my head above water. and that was the last time we ever subdued a patient by that particular means! we never let that resident give another injection, either! she's probably still trying to live that one down.

One day we got an elderly man into our acute psych unit because he was found walking naked in the dead of winter and became combative with the police and so he was brought in for a psych eval. I felt he was more dementia then acutely mentally ill. Well, we had him for 30 days, during that time, his family came to visit and brought him a huge bag of M&M candies... he'd eat a half a cupful and then throw them on the floor. One particular night, our Health Service Workers (PSYCH TECHS) were getting particularly upset at having to clean up after him, so I redirected this client and said, "Jim, what are you doing??" as i walked him into the bathroom to wash his hands... He told me he was feeding his chickens. Meanwhile as we were in the bathroom the staff had swept up the M&M's, when we came out He said proudly, "See??....they ate 'em all".... He had a propensity for pouring his dinner tray and milk onto his bed.... We figured he was slopping the hogs....

We Dx'd him with Alzheimers... he went back to a place in time when he was a young boy doing his chores on the farm...