I'm a new "baby" nurse graduated may, took boards in July started about 2 weeks ago in an "internship" program. The past 2 weeks have been a little rough and I'm already feeling frustrated. The 2nd week my preceptor told me she thought I wasn't as far along as I should be and reported this to the education department, which made me feel about 2 inches tall. I thought this was very unfair CONSIDERING I've only been on the floor in the nursing role 2 weeks (a mixture of orientation training and floor time ~3 days with her.) In any case in my mind I thought that was ridiculous decided not to let it get to me and move on.
I worked the beg of this past week to and I just again an continuing to feel depressed and frustrated. The one day I took 2 of my own pts. Problem was when I needed help with things I wasn't 100% confident with I would have a hard time finding my preceptor as she was off busy with her pts. To her credit it is a buussy flloorr. At the end of the shift in a rushed state she finally reviewed my charting (I had some areas I wanted a second set of eyes to review but I was feeling a little uncertain I had charted things correctly.) We quickly reviewed and I went home. Of course after the fact I was thinking about things and I realized I forgot to go over with her one section that I'm not sure I did correctly and I've been worried about it ever since. IT just makes me mad YES it is my fault I Forgot to point it out to her; BUT I just feel like she's rushing soo much that I'm not getting some of the time I need to make sure things are done correctly. On one hand I am glad to have my own pts but I feel I STILL do need some guidance at this point.
On top of this I always wonder "what" the other people on the floor think of me - do they think oh their is the slow?? intern who can't keep up. I really like the floor itself; it's an area of nursing I'm very interested in but I feel after this my chances of ending up there because of what she has said our slim. At work I always try to be positive and to not let it show my feelings but I need to vent here. I'm just feeling so negative about everything, like she doesn't like me the floor doesn't like me..
I know I need to keep pushing on and hope for the best but I Just feel so beat up. Any encouraging thoughts would be appreciated.