Feeling Bullied By A Preceptor

[mrsrosstobe]

Hi allnurses community. I have been having issues with my preceptor and am wondering if this is common or if I'm just unlucky. I am a new grad in a busy Med/Surge Tele unit and am almost done with orientation. After the first few weeks my preceptor started to hardly ever supervise me. I thought this was a sign that she trusted me enough to leave me alone. Today I find out that she has been talking to the educator daily and telling her she thinks I can not be trusted to safely handle patients alone and that I have not made any progress since those first few weeks. She never made any indication of this before. When I have a question to ask her I can never find her because she just disappears. Once I realized she had even left the unit for almost a half hour without even telling me. If she can't trust me to safely handle patients then why does she leave me alone? I plan on asking her this when I next see her. I can't believe I am only just finding out that she thinks I am doing a bad job. Based on her rec I have been told I will fail my orientation unless I can prove a tremendous amount of progress in the next few weeks which I will have a different preceptor because mine doesn't want to precept me anymore. I tried to explain that I would have been changing if I had known I needed to but my preceptor has always told me she has no suggestions for me. Since my preceptor is in grad school she has to leave work right away at the end of the shift. We had agreed to both come in early once a week so we can have a quick chat about my progress (or lack of according to her). She never came early and always only showed up 5 mins before the shift starts so we don't have time to talk. My preceptor says she has repeatedly told me what I should work on and that I keep making all of the same mistakes. However, we have never actually had any discussion. If I ask for something I need to improve on she gives me a broad answer like "time management" or "seeing the big picture" never anything specific.

Once I was talking to a physician on the phone and he asked me to hold. I was waiting for him to come back to the phone when my preceptor came up to me and asked me if I was done with my documenting yet. I said "no" and was going to explain further but then the doctor came back to the phone and started giving orders that I had to write down. I motioned to my preceptor that I needed a second. Later my preceptor told the educator I was giving her attitude and when she asked me a question I ignored her because I was chatting on the phone. I was irate when I heard this because getting orders is not "chatting on the phone". I told my preceptor why I was on the phone and she just asked why I hadn't done that earlier. Now I am in danger of failing orientation. It is my word against my preceptors and of course I will be the one presumed to be lying. If anyone else has had a similar situation I would love to hear how you handled it. Thnx.

[MajesticRN]

Hi allnurses community. I have been having issues with my preceptor and am wondering if this is common or if I'm just unlucky. I am a new grad in a busy Med/Surge Tele unit and am almost done with orientation. After the first few weeks my preceptor started to hardly ever supervise me. I thought this was a sign that she trusted me enough to leave me alone. Today I find out that she has been talking to the educator daily and telling her she thinks I can not be trusted to safely handle patients alone and that I have not made any progress since those first few weeks. She never made any indication of this before. When I have a question to ask her I can never find her because she just disappears. Once I realized she had even left the unit for almost a half hour without even telling me. If she can't trust me to safely handle patients then why does she leave me alone? I plan on asking her this when I next see her. I can't believe I am only just finding out that she thinks I am doing a bad job. Based on her rec I have been told I will fail my orientation unless I can prove a tremendous amount of progress in the next few weeks which I will have a different preceptor because mine doesn't want to precept me anymore. I tried to explain that I would have been changing if I had known I needed to but my preceptor has always told me she has no suggestions for me. Since my preceptor is in grad school she has to leave work right away at the end of the shift. We had agreed to both come in early once a week so we can have a quick chat about my progress (or lack of according to her). She never came early and always only showed up 5 mins before the shift starts so we don't have time to talk. My preceptor says she has repeatedly told me what I should work on and that I keep making all of the same mistakes. However, we have never actually had any discussion. If I ask for something I need to improve on she gives me a broad answer like "time management" or "seeing the big picture" never anything specific.

Once I was talking to a physician on the phone and he asked me to hold. I was waiting for him to come back to the phone when my preceptor came up to me and asked me if I was done with my documenting yet. I said "no" and was going to explain further but then the doctor came back to the phone and started giving orders that I had to write down. I motioned to my preceptor that I needed a second. Later my preceptor told the educator I was giving her attitude and when she asked me a question I ignored her because I was chatting on the phone. I was irate when I heard this because getting orders is not "chatting on the phone". I told my preceptor why I was on the phone and she just asked why I hadn't done that earlier. Now I am in danger of failing orientation. It is my word against my preceptors and of course I will be the one presumed to be lying. If anyone else has had a similar situation I would love to hear how you handled it. Thnx.

I am in the same boat as you. My orientation was extended by 2wks because they felt I wasn`t meeting the expectations. My preceptor never gave me any feedback and i thought i was doing just fine until she told the educator and nurse manager otherwise. I was so depressed and worried that I might get fired before or after orientation. I am always assigned 5-6 pts (4 total care no tech, 1 hourly check pt, 2 constantly demanding pain meds) while others get 3-4pts, I assume that is part of the orientation, though I alway do my best but how can i learn when I`m constantly running between 6 pts. I am very close to giving up and thinking maybe i wasn`t made to be a nurse. But I will not quit, I will let them decide. Hang in there, they always say it will get better!

[doodledome]

I dont think your preceptor was givin general answers with time management or seeing the big picture. We dont learn this in nursing coming out school so its a HUGE problem and learning curve. Seeing th ebig picture you need to be able to think ahead of whats happening. For example your patient has become stable there have been no new orders what are the mds plan? discharge to home? are they going to need subacute care? how about the meds they are on what are new or what kind of teaching do i need to begin doing today so they are ready to go when the orders are written. I too was bulied by my preceptor who eventally did get fired for her poor behavior towards staff. Keep your head up. Take to heart though the things they told you to improve upon and really really work hard at them. You can do it.

[NurseCard, ADN]

Request to sit down with your manager, preceptor, and maybe have another nurse there, not

your preceptor but maybe another nurse who has worked there a while that you can trust. Ask

them what you need to work on, and ask them to be as specific as possible. Then pledge to

work on those things. Doodledome made a good post. Good luck!!!!

[mrsrosstobe]

Thank you for the responses. I have taken the advice to heart and am trying to improve on my weaknesses. Beyond that, my concern was how my preceptor was twisting the truth to make me sound bad, such as the story mentioned above when I was talking to a doctor but she made it sound like I was on a personal call and I have never made a personal call and she knows it. I once typed up information for a patient and gave him the print out and I did so independantly. The patient's wife came up to me at the nurse's station later and thanked me for it. The educator was standing there too so I thought finally I can show her something positive but my preceptor says loudly "I'm glad you finally did what I told you to". She never told me to do so. I had decided on my own after having a conversation with the patient and realizing he doesn't know much about his condition. But it is her word against mine. My only defense is the truth but they def. believe my preceptor over me.

[dudette10, MSN, RN]

I have no help for you, but your preceptor sounds like a manipulative, vile woman.

[Loadbetty]

God we must work at the same place! I have had the same experiences....all I can do is sink deeper into depression and cry....not at work - but at home - I'm totally lost and don't know where to turn!