Explaining Personal Issues to Interviewer

[PoppleWombatRN]

I finished my ADN in December and received my RN license at the end of March. I worked to support myself while taking my prereq's and all through nursing school as an emergency/critical care vet tech (as I had been doing since 2006.) During the last 3 years, I was also been the primary caregiver for my boyfriend, who had worsening myotonic muscular dystrophy. On top of all of that I have an autoimmune disease myself. Due to these issues I was unable to pursue any externships, and my instructors were less than impressed with me because I was so exhausted from working overnights PRN and dealing with my boyfriend.

Just after I graduated, said boyfriend and I parted ways because he began using elicit drugs to cope with pain and depression, and shortly following that I had a pretty severe exacerbation of dermatomyositis, causing extreme fatigue and muscle weakness, resulting in a move across state to stay with family.

On top of all of that, the primary place where I had recently been working PRN is now administrated by someone who basically told me I could forget about having a reference because he personally doesn't like me. I have the same problem with 2 of the 3 other places that I was employed. I have always been very hard-working and never had any issues with patient care, and all of these places still call me to offer shifts. I feel as though this is largely due to jealousy.

So, my question is... How do I explain any of this to a prospective employer now that I am well enough to apply for my first RN position? Obviously it seems unprofessional to dump all of these personal problems on an interviewer's lap, and I certainly understand that I don't sound like a very good candidate...particularly the fact that I have been too sick to do anything for the last few months.

I have individual veterinarians from each of the places I've worked who have agreed to be references, one that has written me a glowing recommendation (a former RN of 13 years), a letter from a past supervisor of one of the vet hospitals, and 2 from individuals whom I trained.

What's a new nurse to do?

[Nola009]

Hmm if it were me, I wouldn't allow a prospective employer to call my current one. Your employer might not

"like"you,but isn't he required to give you a basic reference? Like-- 'yeah, she worked here from __ to __. 'Could you get a coworker to offer a ref?

[PoppleWombatRN]

Thank you for your response, as I appreciate any and all input. Please refer to the entire last paragraph of my post.

[JustBeachyNurse, LPN]

Hand in copies of the references you have assuming the references included contact information for verification.

As far as the rest, if it caused gaps in employment simply state took care of family business that has since resolved.

[PoppleWombatRN]

Thank you, I want to be concise but was afraid of coming off as evasive. The references I do have, which are all excellent, do have contact info on them.

[JustBeachyNurse, LPN]

There is no moral or legal reason to say more than family issues now resolved. Admitting you dated a drug abuser or have medical issues can create illegal bias. If asked state contingency plans in place so that I can devote full attention to my work.

[NurseGirl525, ASN, RN]

I would just be vague without going into detail. You are not obligated to say anything more than family issues which have now resolved and allowed me to go back to work. If you divulge details I can guarantee you will not get hired. Make sure the references you have are great and hand those in. But if they call your current employer although they may not be able to say anything specific the tone that they leave can say volumes and you may be done for already. I would work on my relationships my current job while you are looking for another.