Published Aug 11, 2005
Maren26
11 Posts
I am about to start nursing school this fall. I already have a good job (though not what I want to do ultimately but one that I need to keep through school) so I thought to get my feet wet in the field, volunteering would be a good option. This week I had my first day volunteering in the ER. I thought this would be a good place to see a lot of different medical issues. Plus I'm not just getting people in the waiting room coffee, in fact I'm not in the waiting room at all.
I came in about 7 a.m. ready to go. I was prepared to see trauma and I was realistic at least I thought about it all. What I saw was a man who was brought in because he committed suicide by driving his car into an oncoming train. He was brought in by helicopter but was dead when he got to hospital. He was pretty messed up to say the least. I saw his body and I don't think however prepared I thought I was, I definatly wasn't ready for that. I think I handled the situation professionally and didn't lose my composure. However I feel like I'll be a bad nurse if I can't handle things like that.
Will these feelings pass? Is this something I just need to get used to?
student4ever
335 Posts
I am about to start nursing school this fall. I already have a good job (though not what I want to do ultimately but one that I need to keep through school) so I thought to get my feet wet in the field, volunteering would be a good option. This week I had my first day volunteering in the ER. I thought this would be a good place to see a lot of different medical issues. Plus I'm not just getting people in the waiting room coffee, in fact I'm not in the waiting room at all. I came in about 7 a.m. ready to go. I was prepared to see trauma and I was realistic at least I thought about it all. What I saw was a man who was brought in because he committed suicide by driving his car into an oncoming train. He was brought in by helicopter but was dead when he got to hospital. He was pretty messed up to say the least. I saw his body and I don't think however prepared I thought I was, I definatly wasn't ready for that. I think I handled the situation professionally and didn't lose my composure. However I feel like I'll be a bad nurse if I can't handle things like that. Will these feelings pass? Is this something I just need to get used to?
Wow. Not many people see something that graphic their first day in the ED. It must be very traumatic for you (and it probably would have been traumatic for myself as well, even though I've worked in the ED for two years now.). Give it a little time. Not every patient is that bad off. And it takes time to "get used" to those kind of things to the point where you can see it for "what can I do to help this poor soul" rather than feeling your knees go weak. You never really get used to it in that it doesn't bother you anymore. But your instinct to help kicks in, especially once you have some medical training under your belt, and you go from there. Or, maybe the ER isn't for you. Not all nurses work in the ER! Please don't give up on a potential career in nursing based on one day. Give it some time, and if you still feel like nursing isn't for you, then you saved yourself from the stress of school! If you do decide to go for it, welcome to nursing! Also, welcome to this board, and you can always come here to vent or just to chat with people. It's a great site - I'm soooo addicted!
Aneroo, LPN
1,518 Posts
I started out at the age of 13 volunteering in an ER in a smaller hospital, and saw many a horrific thing. I think that is what has helped kind of harden my stomach to things.
The emotional part, however, is totally normal. It's ok to be sad, to cry, and it's ok to sometimes not show emotion at all, but it's knowing WHEN to do so that matters. I think you have to have some emotion, but can't be all emotion. If you cry everytime a bad case comes in, I doubt you'd be working in the trauma part very long. Sometimes you do have to step back and be objective. I think it'd probably be less hard (but not easy by any means) to be objective with the case you're talking about- the guy did it to himself. That was his goal, and he reached it.
-Andrea
Brotherbob, BSN, RN
100 Posts
I don't think however prepared I thought I was, I definatly wasn't ready for that. I think I handled the situation professionally and didn't lose my composure. However I feel like I'll be a bad nurse if I can't handle things like that. Will these feelings pass? Is this something I just need to get used to?
There is no way you could be prepared to see that on your first day i ER. I hope the staff took good care of you.
Those that come in dead are sometimes harder to handle, because there is nothing I can do to save their life. The intensity is not there. I did not get a chance to do anything to prevent it. It is just hopeless and messy. The challenge is to take care of the remains with dignity.
On the "living" trauma patients my focus is to do all I can to save this human life, or minimize suffering. Professionality replaces most emotions....... for a while. They sometimes come back later and needs to be delt with.
The key to survive in ER is to enjoy the good times, and when times are not so good to be able to vent and deal with the emotions afterwards.
I have no idea if ER is for you, but you can be assured that all of us at some point were unsure if we could handle it. Give it some more time and make sure you have someone you can talk to.
Hope your next day will be better!
MIA-RN1, RN
1,329 Posts
I would think the feelings will get easier to handle. Part of what makes a good nurse is the compassionate professionality that we strive for. It is a shame ethat instead of just getting your feet wet, you ended up being thrown in. But you will learn pretty quickly if this an area you want to work in or not.
I have been tech'ing in the ER for about 3 weeks and last week I saw a code. not graphic at all like your experience but still moving. The atmosphere was different after the code. People were still the same but the air was different for a while. The charge nurse said a little blessing over the patient who had come in alone. That moved me and I told her that later and she said no one deserves to die alone.
You also have to think that not everyone is cut out for trauma nursing and there is nothing wrong with that. The beauty of nursing as a career and profession is that the opportunities are so wide and varied.
So will the feelings go away completely? Maybe, maybe not. BUt its that same caring and feeling that makes a good nurse.
SmilingBluEyes
20,964 Posts
I can't say you will "get used to it"....but you will learn how to cope. What you saw was HORRENDOUS and no one gets used to that......
if it haunts you, please consider talking w/your colleagues (the experienced ones) about this and how they cope, and also never forget your EAP if it REALLY continues to bother you. (((gentle hugs))). That must have been awful for you.
I appreciate everyone's input! It's nice to know that my feelings are normal and that I'm not going crazy. I am definatly still interested in working some day in the ED but only time will tell...I've been feeling like in the past few days this experience has made me stronger. I am not giving up on nursing! Thanks again to everone who replied.