Embarrassed for Having Good Grades?

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Does anyone out there ever feel kind of sheepish when tests are handed back and you are one of only a handful of A's in the class? I'm not trying to toot my own horn or be egotistical, but I genuinely feel embarrassed when everyone is ragging on me and saying how badly they did on the exam. All I can say to them is "I would be happy to study with you" or that, "oh I killed myself studying for this one". Is there a better way I can handle this? Or should I just get my paper back and hide it immediately while ignoring everyone's questions of "what'd you get?"

Also, I am proud that I am doing well in my classes and very grateful for it. I'm just kind of a shy person and hate being embarrassed! :/

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Specializes in Utilization Management.

Does your teacher announce who got A's or are these people seeing your grade on your test? When you get your test back, look at your grade then put your test face down on your desk. If anyone asks, just say 'I passed'. Your grades are no one else's business, especially if they are going to rag on you and make you feel embarassed. It's not your problem that they didn't do well.

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He does announce how many of each letter grade the class received, but he doesn't single people out. But when you have a good grade he hands them back to you face up and everyone around you can see. If you got a bad grade, he find of folds it and turns it upside down (which I don't think he realizes he is doing, he is really very nice). So, in the process of handing them back, people will see the grade you get. It just sucks that not only do they kind of give me a hard time by making me feel bad they didn't do so well, they also kind of assume I don't study or am a "super-genious" (as one girl said). I study my @$$ off for these kinds of results and everyone thinks it just comes easy if you get good grades. Sorry, just ranting haha.

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Specializes in Utilization Management.

Maybe you could talk to him and tell him that you prefer your test be handed back in a more discreet manor. I haven't gotten a test back in a long time (grades are posted online), but I do remember how snarky people can be when it comes to grades. I'd say it's jealousy on the part of those who aren't making the good grades. But, again, it's not your fault that these other people didn't do well. Don't let them make you feel bad about their shortcomings.

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I generally just say, "I'm happy with my grade, how about you, are did you get the grade you wanted?"

This way it take the focus off of the actual grades and instead focuses on if they met their goal. Truly, I think that's more important as what I want to know is if they hit their goal or not...the actual grade is meaningless to me.

Oh, and don't let anyone make you feel bad for doing well. You worked hard, and have nothing to be ashamed about. You had nothing to do with their grade, if they don't like their grade....well they'll have to do something about it. It would be like feeling bad that your car worked when they had car trouble.....don't let them make it your fault.

They can only make you feel bad, if you let them.

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Specializes in ER.

That drives me nuts! I often will get sheepish about my good grades as well. It took me a long time to be proud of how well I do, and to not want to hide it. And I hate that people always have some excuse as to why you did well, like your a super genius, or Oh you have more time to study, or you this must just come naturally for you! NO!!! I too study sooooooo much to earn the grades I do and in doing so I have learned what steps I need to take in order to get that well deserved A. It's funny because ppl automatically assume I'm a ditzy southern cali girl who won't do very well in her classes and then are shocked to see that I get A's - this even leads to ppl assuming I cheat. SO... To make a long story short :) Yes I feel your pain! If someone asks how you did, say you passed, if they ask for more details, gladly tell them you got an A. They are the one's who wanted to know. And you are the one who worked hard to get it!

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Specializes in CTICU.

Heck no, I'm not embarrassed. Then again, I'm in grad school and I think we are all old enough (and paying enough for school!) to realize we get out what we put in. There's none of that "ooh, you're a smarty pants with an A" like there was in undergrad. We are more genuinely impressed with people's work when they get A's.

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Thanks, guys! I was starting to feel a bit crazy like I was the only one who felt this way. I know it's dumb to feel embarrassed about doing well, but it's hard sometimes when people try to bring you down or downplay how hard you work. I have lost many hours of sleep and/or play studying for these classes. Glad I'm not the only one people bully lol.

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Specializes in Labor and Delivery.

I have a similar problem as you too! I tend to be an A student and whenever we got our tests back all my friends would snark over "oh she's extremely smart" "or ew how'd you get that grade" or "man I wish I had that, I did horrible". And so on so forth. I just ignored it half the time, still do, and just smile. Then there are the comments I always get about when we were applying for the fall 2010 RN program when I said I really hope I get in and I get "you're a genius, you'll get in, I have to worry about getting in". Sometimes it does annoy me because I also study my butt off to pull off the grades and I'm no genius haha! Science comes easy to me most of the time, but it doesn't mean I don't have to put tons of effort into my classes! What works for me when someone makes a grade remark is I just smile and say "I am sure you'll do better next time" or "I had to study very hard for this" etc!

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In my micro class in the summer 2 people had like real As as in 90 percent up. the only other As were like 2 people with 88 percent. I had like 98 percent.. Nothing to be a shame of. Hell I always go "I killed that sh1t" and I was happy b/c I taught myself about 90 percent of the stuff and the instructor sucked.

Its not like I went around telling people my grade and gloating about it (although my lab partners knew it b/c they asked) some how everyone else knew my grade and I could care less. I don't care about anyone in my classes besides for my friends and lab group.

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Oh, I hate that, too! I mean, just because I get good grades doesn't mean I am the only person applying with a good GPA and good entrance test scores. My worrying is legitimate! lol

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Specializes in CSICU/CTICU.

Honestly I can't fathom why an adult (or child, for that matter) would be embarrassed for getting good grades? The reward for studying is good grades, the reward for doing well in school is good grades..you should have a smile on your face! Sounds like you're in class with a bunch of underachievers or five year olds....You earned your grades now own them with pride and take solace in knowing the destiny of your "cooler" failing classmates...You know what I mean :-P

Elle

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