Dual diagnosis...anyone?

[skinnedknee]

Dual Diagnosis...anyone?

My story begins as many of yours did: I was caught diverting meds from the pyxis. However, there is a bit of a twist that I haven't seen anyone else describe before. I started at home with vicodin and I noticed a really neat side effect: it took away the voices I've been hearing for over 25 years. So I began taking from the pyxis and the voices were gone.

I've heard voices, or rather I call them "whisperings", suffered from delusions and hallucinations since I was nine. I never have been formally diagnosed with anything and never felt the need to. I also grew up with a schizophrenic uncle. He was really bad off and my experiences were mild at best, nothing compared to what he experienced.

So to make a long story short, aftertaking the vicodin to soothe the voices, it spiked a 180 and* my whisperings turned into full on, command hallucinations. People's faces would warp and I couldn't shake the sense that I was being "watched" through satilites in the sky. I stopped taking the narcotics because the voices told me to stuff them in the sharps container to "save the world."

Eventually, after a year I was caught.* I've lost my job and am about to sign a contract with hprp. The psychiatrist/addictionist I'm seeing is wonderful. He is very understanding and supports nurses in trouble. He thinks I have a thought-mood disorder(only one I can think of in that category is schizoaffective disorder)

So, anyone have any similar experiences? I don't see a lot of dual diagnoses on here, if at all!

[VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN]

I'm dual-diagnosed with alcoholism and bipolar 1. The alcohol hasn't been an issue for over two decades, but I did have an incident very recently where I violated abstinence by over-medicating with Ativan after a serious argument with a family member. So it's still a concern; thankfully my BP is managed fairly well now and I have an excellent support system.

I had to semi-retire from active nursing a couple of months ago because of cognitive changes and a growing inability to focus. I took myself off the floor and now only do SNF admissions, some QA work, and a little patient education. It's not much, but it does provide some money and more importantly, it provides dignity and a sense of purpose. Nothing is worse for a person with dual diagnoses (or any other sort of illness) than to feel useless, for it leads our minds down paths best left unexplored.

I hope you are fortunate enough to continue seeing the same doctor; continuity of care is crucial and you'll do so much better if you can work with someone you like and respect. I also hope you'll feel free to come here to AN for support with your MH issues as well as for education and sharing; we have a small but vocal number of nurses with psychiatric conditions who are more than happy to talk about it. All the best to you, and Welcome to Allnurses!

[poppycat, ADN, BSN]

I'm also dual-diagnosed with bipolar & alcoholism. My drinking was at its worst in the mid 1980's when I used alcohol to escape from debilitating panic attacks. I've been sober since 1/2/1989 but know very well I'm not immune to relapse.

My bipolar is well controlled with a low dose antidepressant. I can't take mood stabilizers because they make me manic. I have an awesome psych doc who's very much aware of my addiction issue & asks me every time I see her if I've had any cravings or thoughts of drinking. Fortunately I've always been able to tell her no (so far!). I think having an understanding doctor is half the battle.

[ER/Trauma Nurse]

You are not alone, this is my first day on this site so I am very encouraged to find this forum. I also am dual diagnosis, bipolar and opiate addiction, I have received treatment in the past but fell from sobriety during a medication change. I am fortunate that my employer has placed me on medical leave and I leave for rehab (a dual diagnosis facility) on the 22nd. What is hprp? Has your Board of Nursing been any help? We have a diversion program in california that has been a great help to me.

[poppycat, ADN, BSN]

Welcome, to the site. Hope the rehab you go to helps. I've heard of one in Texas that's dual diagnosis rehab & they're supposed to be really good. (Dr. Phil sends lots of people there.)

HPRP is the "punishing" body in Michigan. They're not really helpful but are very punitive.

[Meriwhen, ASN, BSN, MSN, RN]

I think it's safe to say that a lot (not all) of the nurses that post in here are dual diagnosis. Or they may have an Axis II diagnosis in lieu of--or in addition to--the psychiatric diagnosis. They may just be choosing not to discuss their non-CD diagnosis in this arena. So you're not as alone as you think.

Unfortunately, substance abuse and psychiatric disorders run hand in hand, with one frequently exacerbating the other. Some choose to self-medicate to manage their psychiatric symptoms. Others find that drinking, drugging, what-have-you, are compounding their depression/psychosis/personality disorder and making it worse.