Doing My Peds Rotation On Oncology Hemotology....

Pediatric Critical Care Columnist · Jul 23, 2006

What would you do for your own child? If you can put yourself in their place for even one minute, you'll know what you would like to have done for you. I know how draining it is to be a caregiver for a child who has been given a death sentence, but really when it comes right down to it, kids with cancer are still kids. If you have a little bit of time, read them a story. Or play Barbies, or put nail polish on their fingers and toes. Boys too! If they're too sick for those kinds of things, put on some soft music and give them a nice bath or even better, wash their hair. Ask the parents about the kinds of things the child likes to do and what kind of kid they are when they're well. Show that you're interested and you'll be well ahead of the game. Downplay the clinical stuff. They know it's there and it's not going away, but it doesn't have to be all that's happening in the room. Pay attention to the siblings. Include them in whatever's going on. With only one patient per clinical day, you can do a of of things the family will remember forever. No one will ever say, "That Janey was such a great nurse... she made sure Jimmy got his meds right on time every day." But they will say, "Remember the time that Janey made a tea party with the med cups and apple juice? And she put popcorn in a bedpan!!"

lawilk99 · Jul 23, 2006

I agree with janfrn and I would also add that giving the parents "permission " to take care of themselves by taking a break to go outside and get some fresh air, etc., can help the child indirectly as well. I know your question was specifically about helping the child but some parents feel they must spend every moment at the bedside. That can be quite draining emotionally as well as physically.

I think your desire to help will be understood whether you realize it or not.

Pediatric Critical Care Columnist · Jul 23, 2006

lawilk99... how could I have overlooked the parents? Shame on me! In my real life they're always a priority... go have breakfast... take a shower, you'll feel like a new woman... when was the last time you saw the sun?... maybe the other kids would like to go play on the swings for awhile... Many parents are unable to separate from their child even to take a pee break without feeling like they're abandoning them. I like to remind them that there is a life outside the walls of their child's room, that they must look after themselves by eating regularly, getting enough fluid, some exercise, some fresh air, some down time, some real sleep... in order to be there for the child and that no one would ever criticize them for taking a half hour for themselves. Yeah, maybe the kid will fuss and carry on that Mom or Dad is leaving them, but telling them that Mom will come back soon, always and no matter what often defuses the kid enough. I learned all of this the hard way, and when it was my own child in the bed, it took a security escort to get me to go for lunch. Now I know how important it is to have "me time" and have developed a script for talking to parents about self-care. I call is "Standard Lecture #72" and most of the time it works.

MrsMommaRN · Jul 24, 2006

thanks so much for your replies. it means so much to me. i look forward to my clinical day tommrow.