Deeply Disappointed and Burned Out

[Burned Out, BSN]

I graduated with my BSN in 2021 and went straight to the ICU. I was able to preceptor in ICU and cardiac before graduating I loved the experience and the critical thinking. When I received my job I was super excited however was hit with a dose of reality. Despite loving the critical thinking aspect I did not have the thick skin to go along with it. After 4 short months I decided to go into dialysis outpatient and realized how disorganized and unprofessional these clinics can be and was not given a proper preceptor but was given a technician to train me and being a new nurse it was really to my disadvantage. As I was not progressing in that environment I went to a new independently owned outpatient surgical center. Unfortunately, was given only 3 days of orientations (yes, you read that right). It was not a bad job but it was definitely disorganized and not helping me as a new RN. I decided to go back to dialysis at a different clinic where they gave me somewhat better training. I stayed there as I enjoyed the coworkers and patients but still just was not satisfied, I decided I would stay on PRN and go to a new hospital built to where I lived and go inpatient dialysis. This was on the ICU floor where the first 3 rooms were dedicated to dialysis. I thought to myself finally now in a hospital I will definitely get some good training from an RN and become more confident in my role. Unfortunately, I was more than wrong. No nurse trained me a technician did (a controlling one at that) yet management expected me to run like I was a nurse of 20 years of experience. It was just me and the controlling technician. The dialysis lead worked from home. Amongst it all I have become burned out and feel like a complete failure but I know down deep it was the health system that failed me. 
 

Reflecting I enjoy the outpatient setting but I also want to use my nursing skills. I do have some Chronic health issues that limit me hence why the outpatient is a better set up for me.

Any advice from those more experienced, should I just give up nursing? I would have lived doing research nursing or become an NP but I feel too much of a failure now. 

[HiddenAngels]

Don't be too hard on yourself.  You've accomplished a lot.  Some people don't have the courage to step out and try new things, but you did.  Unfortunately you ran into some bad experiences along the way but it's taught you what will and what won't work for you. 

At this point you have to find what you like and focus on that.  You like outpatient so I would lean more towards those kinds of jobs.  There are clinics that are NP run.  Try to get employment with one of those, that way you can finish school and be a front runner when an NP position opens up.

Good Luck!

[Burned Out, BSN]

Oh wow! This is super encouraging, thank you so much! I will take this advice in my decision making. 

[xbananachipsx, BSN, RN]

I've had my fair share of job hopping. outpatient to inpatient to outpatient again. It's okay to keep searching what works best for you. It's okay to not work in med surg right out of nursing school. All these preconceptions about what to aim for as a new grad stresses everyone out. I have clinical depression and anxiety, and I get the struggle, now with 10 years under my belt. 

Listen to your gut as well. You don't want to be put into a position where you're forced/coerced to do something you don't want/sign up for. You also want to protect your license. 

If, however, you feel like you don't enjoy nursing anymore, then I would consider other options. 

Nonetheless hang in there and things will be okay. 

[Nurse Beth, MSN]

As a hiring manager, you are a flight risk, and landing a good job will become increasingly difficult. 

You left the ICU as a new grad after only 4 months and then went on to leave several jobs after that. At one job that provided better training, where you liked your coworkers and patients, you "weren't satisfied" and left.

I don't know if you ever made it through Reality Shock as a new grad, but you are not giving yourself a chance to learn and grow.

You are asking which job would be best for you—it's one in which you stay for 1-2 years and start to build a work history. Best wishes.

 

 

[Burned Out, BSN]

I see what you're saying, the job that was better I remained at as PRN. I have been there for about 2 years now. Though, I will say the training was not all encompassing. Thank you for the insight I do appreciate it!