Conflicted about advancing to APN

Sounds like you are reasoning with yourself and quite rightly so. It's a big decision and one only you can make. For what it's worth I will tell you that it's hard. It won't go exactly as you planned it, but it will be challenging and exciting but it will also be stressful and tiring and demanding. I was also a critical care nurse but I made the decision to go into acute care because it's the only thing I can see myself doing. I don't mind if I end up in a specialty but I couldn't bear doing primary care. So far I have managed to keep working and I am fortunate to have a manager who understands what it's like to be in school. Both the director and the assistant director of my department did their master's recently and are both of a similar age to me so they have been exeptional in letting me arrange my schedule around school and clinicals. I work mon-fri office hours so as you can imagine that's not been an easy transition. Unfortunately that also means I have had few days off and sometimes keep going for weeks at a time in order to juggle all the balls.

I will say that there have been many times when I almost gave up. I nearly quit last month in fact when it all got too much, but I have persevered and have one year left of my program. I realize that I have invested too much to give up now and I know that in the future I will be glad i did it. I have a very comfortable life and job, a cozy private office space, excellent independent hours, no weekends, call or nights in my job right now. I wear nice clothes to work and drink coffee all day, and yet here I am contemplating a return to the craziness of the ICU. Why? Because it's in my blood, I crave it and I love the feeling when I walk into the unit. Life changes and nothing is guaranteed and so if informatics as a specialty tanked tomorrow I know that I have a future and a guarantee of sorts of a decent income for life by being an APRN in acute care. I've made lots of sacrifices to do this. I also believe in work/life balance but that has taken a big hit this year. I haven't seen my friends nor partaken in any of my hobbies or kept myself fit. I was run down and exhausted and ended up getting the flu and was off sick for 2 weeks. I was too sick to study and I missed clincials too, and I was a week alte taking an exam that I was convinced I would fail, but I ended up scoring a 93% which was the tipping point for me to realize that I can do this. It has given me time to sit and contemplate what I'm doing and to make the decision to continue but with a promise to myself that I start to take care of myself, find time for fitness and self care and to indulge in some "me" time even if it takes me away from homework. This is our one life and we need to invest in it and enjoy it with one eye always on the future.

This sacrifice is for a finite time only. It will end and life will resume, but if you make the decision to go for it, throw yourself in wholeheartedly and realize that there will be sacrifices and hard work and some difficult decisions. I wish you luck in your decision making. Progress is never a step back, and moving forward will always take you somewhere new.

I can't speak to any of the fields in reference but one thing to consider in light of spending time, money and effort for the DNP and then not using it.. If you decide against using the degree, your current position puts you in a better position of paying it off than if you were to use it. Almost a win-win in an unconventional way. And it may seem a total waste but how could education ever be completely wasted?

I think you should defer a year, 1) So you can see how you like your current position after the honeymoon period 2) Throwing in the stress of school may cloud your perception of either.

I was an RN for nine years before I graduated as an FNP. I have been a nurse practitioner for six years now. Two in primary care and four years in cardiology. I feel like my work life balance is worse as an np. I work four ten hour shifts per week which are sometimes longer with the charting. Starting in the fall I will have to do hospital rounding on some weekends. My pay is not much more than I could make as an RN with my years of experience. Remember in a clinic job the work never ends. There are always phone calls from patients, refills to review and sign, and other paperwork to do. I feel like there is less flexibility as an NP. I miss being the expert. If I had it to do over again I wouldn't do it. Also since I've graduated and with the flood of online programs the market is saturated and it's hard to find something else. I don't think I had a great idea of the role when I went through school. It was just the next step I thought. Those are just my two cents I know there are plenty of NPs who love what they do.

Rocknurse, Yes.... the sacrifice is great, but you are right about it being finite. I'm glad you're pressing on. If I make the commitment then I, too, will need to delve fully in. Thanks for sharing the real-life struggles of it.

Libby, I like your logic! It's true... my current job is a good hedge in this situation -- financially speaking and otherwise. I never thought of it that way.

Bayecheri, Thank you for your honesty. I imagine that is hard for you to feel that way --- that you wouldn't do it again if you had the chance. It sounds like you are enjoying success, but at perhaps a higher cost than you had originally figured on? And that is why I want to be very sure of this before I proceed.