I've been a nurse for 9 months. Started off in a MICU. I just feel so burned out. I've been off orientation for a little over 3 months. I feel stupid 99% of the time. I just had two bad weeks in a row, with poor patient outcomes (one through no fault of my own, another because my pt went from fast asleep/sedated to self-extubated in literally less than five minutes while I was in another room), stress, drama with patient's families, and dealing with mid-levels who truly take pleasure in acting like jerks (this is not just my opinion because I'm upset, both providers I've been dealing with have a reputation on the unit for being intentionally mean/rude to staff nurses). I feel so dumb and like I shouldn't be on the unit. I have had great feedback from my management, co-workers, etc., but I always feel like I'm one dumb error away from a disaster. This week just reinforced for me that I work at a job where the slightest bit of inattention can result in someone dying and I just don't feel like I can handle it anymore. I had a literal panic attack on my drive home from work the other day and the only thing that made me calm down was telling myself I didn't have to go back because I have a couple days off.
I have spent my days off looking at other jobs, but I just don't feel like any other nursing job is going to make me feel less stressed. I could never handle the patient load on a regular med-surg floor. Our progressive care unit is a horrible place to work. I always used to want to be a labor and delivery nurse, but I don't think I can handle the stress of that, either. I truly feel like being in an outpatient setting might be best for my anxiety and how miserable I feel, but I can't afford to take the pay cut right. I just wish there was an easy answer and I'm dreading going back to work.
I guess I'm looking for suggestions about how to cope better so I can get through the next few months and at least make it to 1 year at this job. Suggestions about jobs where my training might be applicable but the work would be less stressful would also be nice.
Hi! I received my BSN in December, passed NCLEX in February, and have been off of orientation from the Cardiac ICU for a month now. I must say, you and I are experiencing the same feelings. I’m mentally exhausted. I never really sleep well the day before my night shift starts. I feel dumb sometimes. I’m terrified of making mistakes. I never want the really critical/complex patients and frankly, I don’t think I’m ready to start caring for them yet. I’m scared something bad will happen to one of them and I won’t know what to do. People at work keep asking me to take care of the IABP and CABG patients and I’m not ready for them yet. I do feel bad for rejecting but I know it’s unsafe at this point because of my lack of knowledge. My mind is constantly overthinking. I’ve been told I do way too much at work. I’ve been called an overachiever many times. I’m contemplating if Cardiac ICU is the right thing for me right now. I don’t know what else to do. I just asked someone to be my mentor so I’m proud of that. But overall my life has just been too overwhelming.
WOW, I can't believe you are already off of orientation! That seems like a very short time to be trained and they already want you taking IABP patients??? I had a 20 week orientation into the medical-surgical ICU and have not yet been trained on IABP (we occasionally get those patients) or CRRT or anything like that! No wonder you feel overwhelmed.... it sounds like you are not getting enough support. I feel for you. I hope that you are able to find a balance in your work and life. I can say that things have slowly been improving for me over the past couple of months thanks to having some more time/experience and thanks to switching to only night shift instead of bouncing back and forth between days and nights. I am still looking for a different position, but I think I am going to stick with this ICU for at least another year to try to come into my own and achieve some competency.
I hope that things improve for you soon! A big turning point for me was joining a gym and going at least three times a week. Makes me feel like I have something to live for other than work and sleep ?
emmjayy, BSN, RN
512 Posts
WOW, I can't believe you are already off of orientation! That seems like a very short time to be trained and they already want you taking IABP patients??? I had a 20 week orientation into the medical-surgical ICU and have not yet been trained on IABP (we occasionally get those patients) or CRRT or anything like that! No wonder you feel overwhelmed.... it sounds like you are not getting enough support. I feel for you. I hope that you are able to find a balance in your work and life. I can say that things have slowly been improving for me over the past couple of months thanks to having some more time/experience and thanks to switching to only night shift instead of bouncing back and forth between days and nights. I am still looking for a different position, but I think I am going to stick with this ICU for at least another year to try to come into my own and achieve some competency.
I hope that things improve for you soon! A big turning point for me was joining a gym and going at least three times a week. Makes me feel like I have something to live for other than work and sleep ?