Backing out of NP job - not my style, but...

[iudiva]

I have interviewed for 2 jobs. Job A is my top choice, but Job B is acceptable. I have a good offer from Job B, but they understand my situation with Job A. They have agreed to hold their offer for over a week while I wait to hear back from Job A.

Job A is taking their sweet time getting back to me. I told them that I had an offer from another clinic, but my top choice would be Job A. They told me "protect yourself," and advised me to accept the offer from Job B, then back out if I was offered Job A. They said, "that is not a major faux pas."

To me, that is completely unprofessional. It's not right, and it's not a position I want to put Employer B in. I respect the organization, and I don't want to burn bridges.

BUT I realize that I'm new to this, and perhaps I'm being naive. I understand employment is at-will, and having Job A would be a huge benefit to me for years to come, while Employer B would only be inconvenienced for a short time by losing me.

So...what do you guys think? If Job A offers me the position after I've already accepted Job B, do I put myself/my family's needs first and back out of Job B? Or do I honor my word, do the right thing and tell Job A they were too late? Is it really "not a major faux pas" to do something like that?!

Obviously I'm going to put pressure on Job A for an answer before my deadline, and possibly ask Job B for a little more time to try to avoid this situation. But I'm scared that I could end up having to make this decision, and I could really use some advice. Thanks!!

[carachel2]

I wouldn't want to work for or with an employer who would have me make a move that goes against my own personal integrity. When I make a commitment I honor it and don't back off just weeks later because something better came along. Sounds like Job A thinks they are all that and a bag of chips and expects you to lie to other people in order to fit them in.

I'm not a big "game player" obviously. Maybe I don't belong in the tough corporate world of negotiations. But my word will always be my word and If I say I'm going to do something I NEVER mean "until something else comes along."

[SlyFoxRN, BSN, RN]

If job A is that much better, just ensure your contract with job B has a "30 day trial" period built in, where either party can cancel within that window if it doesn't fit. If you hear from Job A, and Job B didn't fit in the 30 days, just back out and say you don't think you're the best person for this position and go to job A. Who knows, maybe you'll enjoy job B during the "trial" and stick with it.

Employers treat employees like crap if its in their best interests - they rarely have much professional integrity. Just as Job B would drop you in a heartbeat if someone with 5x the experience came in willing to work for 1/3 the salary (aka: a great opportunity for them) you should drop them if you find something better too.

[SubSippi]

Well, I accepted a job initially, then unexpectedly got offered another job I'd rather have. I told the first job that, unfortunately, my circumstances have changed, and I will no longer be able to take that job. Their responded by thanking me for letting them know, and to keep them in mind in the future for employment. You don't need to get specific.

In my opinion, you should do what you need to do to CYA. The people doing the hiring everywhere don't have your best interests in mind, they have their own and their hospital's. I understand your concern about integrity, and it might be different if there was actually a nursing shortage, or if you had already started the job for a couple week and quit after they spent a bunch of money on you. But you should always put your family's needs first, because if you don't, no one else will.

In reality, they probably have back-ups that they have already interviewed, and will just call them after they get off the phone with you.

Think about it like this...if you end up having to un-accept the Job B offer, it will only be a mild inconvenience. But if things don't work out for you and you reject Job B and don't get Job A, you'll be in a pretty tough spot!